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BENNO

ANDREW ROMAN BENNO

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how to treat a girlThis was written by a guy who has had years of experience.1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house...they run around in their underwear just like we do.2. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be screwed3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat if you hurt her, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat.4. NEVER miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.5. DON'T refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.6. If they slap you hard, you deserved it.7. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.8. If you don't sleep with them, DO NOT tell your friends that you did.8.5 If you DO sleep with them, DON'T tell your friends that you did.9. You can be dirty minded in private, really...most of them are not offended by it...10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.11. Most of them don't mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a pussy..11.5 Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!12. Every girl should eventually get three things from her guy- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to beat the shit out of him.15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, PULL YOUR girlfriend closer.16. NEVER, ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.18. You're dead meat if you can't get along with their pets, parents, and best friends. Be prince charming to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.19. Call them just to see how they are doing, even if you have nothing to talk about.20. Don't be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like shit, so be understanding.21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.22. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend.23. Don't stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.26. Memorize their god damn birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.27. Don't marinade the cologne, but smell good.28. Don't give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful.29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt her more if you draw it out.30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE!!31. No matter what the discussion, disagreement, or fight, the woman is always right. At least she always thinks she is even when she admits she's wrong. Always always apologize and say your sorry and you will be shocked how life starts getting easy. What do you have to lose...an arguement? So what?32. never tell her you love her. if you dont mean it.

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SHANE AND ANDREW"S ARAB TECHNO DANCE LESSON

Add to My Profile | More VideosSHANE AND BENNO AS ZOOKEEPERS

Add to My Profile | More VideosMYSPACE UNDER CONSTRUCTION:::THINGS TO DO AT WALMART::::1. Get 24 boxes of tampons and put them in carts of guys when there not looking.2. Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies restroom.4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone: 'Code 3 in House wares' . . and see what happens.5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay-away.6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.7. Set-up a tent in the Camping Department -- and tell other shoppers you're sleeping over; invite them in, if they bring pillows from the Bedding Department.8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask: "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"9. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick your nose.10. While handling guns in the Hunting Department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.11. Dart around the store suspiciously, while loudly humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."12. In the Auto Department, practice your "Madonna look" using different sized funnels.13. Hide in a clothing rack . . . and when people browse through, say: "PICK ME!!! PICK ME!!!"14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO!...It's those voices again!!!"And last but not least:15. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while, then yell loudly: "There's no toilet paper in here!"

Movies:

Guys: 1-touch their waist 2-talk to them 3-share secrets 4-give her your jacket 5-kiss them slowlyare you remembering this?6-hug her 7-hold her 8-laugh with her 9-invite her somewhere 10-let her be with you when you're with your friendskeep reading11-smile with her 12-take pics with her 13-pull her onto your lap 14-when she says she loves you more, deny it. fight back 15-when her friends say i love her more than you, deny it. fight back and hug her tight so she cant get to her friends. it makes her feel lovedAre you thinking about someone?16-always hug her and say i love you when you see her 17-kiss her unexpectedly 18-HUG HER FROM BEHIND AROUND THE WAIST 19-tell her shes beautiful not sexy! 20-tell her the way you feel about her!..20 u need to show her you mean it too21-kiss her on the lips 22-DONT ask her to buy you stuff. you buy HER stuff 23-TELL HER WHAT FEELS GOOD 24-make her feel loved 25-buy her stuff. small things can still helpwe might deny it but we accutally like and kinda want you to get us things26-don't lie to her 27-dont cheat on her 28-take her anywhere she wants 29-txt messege or call her in the morning and tell her have a good day at school, and how much you miss her 30-be there for her when ever she needs you, & even when she doesn't need you, just be there so she'll know that she can always count on youare you still reading this u better be its important31. Hold her close when she's cold and she can hold you too. 32. When you are alone hold her close and kiss her. 33. Kiss her on the tip of her nose; (it will give her the hint that you want to kiss them). 34. While in the movie, put your arm around her and then she will automatically put her head on your shoulder, then lean in and tilt her chin up and kiss her lightly. 35. Dont ever tell her to leave even jokingly or act like you're mad. If shes upset, comfort herremember this next time you are with her36. When people diss her, stand up for her. 37. Look deep into her eyes and tell her you love her. 38. Lay down under the stars and put her head on your chest so she can listen to the steady beat of your heart, Link your fingers together while you whisper to her as she rests her eyes and listens to you. 39. When walking next to each other grab her hand. 40. When you hug her hold her in your arms as long as possibleMAKE SURE SHE KNOWS SHES LOVED41. Call her at night to wish her sweet dreams. 42. Comfort her when she cries and wipe away her tears 43. Take her for long walks at night. 44. Always Remind her how much you love her.you'll never know when she needs just a lil more love