I HAVE A DANGEROUS SIDE TO ME BECAUSE I ENJOY RUNNING WITH SCISSORS AND TEARING TAGS OFF MATTRESSES...WHEN I'M NOT SERVING TIME FOR THE MATTRESS FELONIES, I ENJOY TRYING TO CATCH FLYS WITH CHOPSTICKS...AFTER THE JAPANESE BEAVER INVASION OF 1984, I QUICKLY MOVED ON TO PLAYING THE SPOONS. I COULDN'T REALLY GET THE SOUND OF MUSIC THAT I WAS LOOKING FOR, SO I MOVED ON TO SPORKS. SPORKS AREN'T ALL THEY'RE CRACKED UP TO BE. YEAH THEY'RE GOOD FOR CHUNKY SOUP BECAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW IF IT'S A SOUP OR A MEAL...BUT I COULDN'T GET THE RIGHT PITCH AND I STARTED TO WEAR A HOLE IN MY JEANS. NOW I'M DOING A LITTLE FREE-LANCE SPOON PLAYING AND JUST TRYING TO GET BY WITH STEALING CLOTHES FROM LAUNDRYMATS AND SELLING THEM TO THRIFT STORES...
