Dan Marino profile picture

Dan Marino

Dan Hates Yao Ming ... So Should You

About Me

Hi, I am NFL Hall Of Fame Quarterback Dan Marino. I was born September 15, 1961, in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Most of you probably know me from my award winning cameo in "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective", though. I didn't really like Jim Carrey that much, but oh well, I was paid. I went to college at Pittsburgh University. I broke every NCAA football record including Longest field goal & Best Hair. The Miami Dolphins selected me as their number one pick (27th overall) in the NFL draft in 1982. We went to the Super Bowl in my rookie year, but lost to the San Francisco 49ers 38-16. But I played great, it was the other guys fault. Dan Marino doesn't take the blame for anything! Anyway....I played a bunch of seasons and everyone that isn't a retard considers me the best player in football history. Sports history, actually. I currently am employed on the CBS football pre-game show. I hate doing it. Shannon Sharpe is a douche, Boomer is a tool, and I'm not even sure who the other guy is. But, again ..... I'm paid.
So check out my space and leave 'Ol Danny Boy some love.These Mongooses never should have stolen Dan's car!Watch Dan get yet another hole-in-one

My Interests

Hanging out with my kids, talking on tv, going to Miami Heat games, withholding autographs from adoring fans, Selling Nutrisystem, beating my gardener, lots more!

I'd like to meet:



No one, I'm fucking Dan Marino !! !Dan is a real prankster.

Music:

Dan only listens to mix tapes that he personally recorded from the radio. Dan thinks Hootie and The Blowfish are cool, though.

Movies:

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (Because I'm in it)

Television:

I tend to not watch any television. One show I do enjoy though is Playboy's "Amateur Home Videos". I have sent countless tapes of myself to them but they have NEVER shown them!!

Books:

Dan does not read books ... Dan just stares the books down until they give him the information he wants.

Heroes:

My cannon of a right arm ... Just ask my gardener how strong it still is!

My Blog

Dan REALLY Hates Yao Ming

Dan has a new enemy in life. His name is Yao Ming. Dan is simply not a fan of this gigantor Chinamen freak. Dan isn't racist ... he just hates this one Asian. Dan doesn't even know where the hate come...
Posted by Dan Marino on Tue, 22 May 2007 06:49:00 PST

Dan's Hasselhoff Thoughts

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPYDOam_qec Dan saw this video today and was horrified and disgusted at this persons actions! How the hell can someone as brilliant as The Hoff wind up with ...
Posted by Dan Marino on Fri, 04 May 2007 01:06:00 PST

Dan's Amazing Day

Dan has been very busy tanning the past few weeks. Dan's tan was slowly fading after all 14 of his personal tanning booths went on the fritz. Dan was too used to having his own booths and was not goin...
Posted by Dan Marino on Sat, 17 Mar 2007 07:15:00 PST

Demolition Man

Dan got bored with watching all the football today, so in between glancing at the various tv's in the studio he put in a dvd called 'Demolition Man."Dan is royally pissed right now! Dan watched the en...
Posted by Dan Marino on Mon, 22 Jan 2007 05:22:00 PST

Dans Thoughts.

Alright, Dan might have to admit he has a problem.. this is Dan being drunk 4/ the last 5 days.. Anyways.. Dan signed on to post a bulletin however Tom had disabled that again.. so Dan made a blo...
Posted by Dan Marino on Wed, 20 Dec 2006 06:53:00 PST

Dan vs. The Flu Shot

This time of year many people, including some of the fortunate members of Dan's family recieve the flu shot. Dan however doesn't approve of it. Dan isn't sure how others feel about the flu shot, but D...
Posted by Dan Marino on Wed, 06 Dec 2006 01:16:00 PST

America's Most Wanted

Hello, Marinoites ...Dan has been watching a lot of America's Most Wanted and has come to the conclusion that he could solve nearly every crime they show. Dan is always watching mystery movies and fig...
Posted by Dan Marino on Sun, 19 Nov 2006 06:39:00 PST

Nutrisystem

Welcome, Marinoite ...Dan is giving you the chance to meet him ... you probably are not worthy of this honor, but oh well. Thanks to Nutrisystem, You may have it happen, though. Check out the links an...
Posted by Dan Marino on Mon, 13 Nov 2006 10:38:00 PST

Dan's Gardener

Hello, Marinoites &The question has been posed to Dan on a few occasions about why he beats his gardener, or at least makes claims of beating his gardener. The truth is this & Dan is very passionate a...
Posted by Dan Marino on Sat, 30 Sep 2006 08:06:00 PST

The Tao of Dan

Hello, loyal Marinoite ...Dan has been so busy of late with his usual family matters and TV gigs. Recently, as many of you, Dan became a spokesman for Nutrisystem. This is a great weight-loss diet syt...
Posted by Dan Marino on Mon, 25 Sep 2006 11:35:00 PST