the teddy bear is dead - ProfilesArchive

About Me

i have found myself, all of about twenty years, to be now less than i was, or less than i had hoped for. i know what i want to be, but not how to acheive it; i know where i want to go, but not how to get there. my only hope now is that i might somehow become what i once believed i was capableof; that i may be half of the man i have been striving to be.

My Interests

i am only truly interested in one thing. unlike most it is not a mere physical expression of the concept, but the overwealming feeling of love itself.

I'd like to meet:

i wake up, everyday, with the mindset that today will be an exceptional day. today, i will meet someone wonderful; i will replace greif with bliss; i will be more than i was yesterday. i go to bed, every night, with the notion that tomarow will be better than today has proven itself to be. maybe someday, i will be happy again.

Music:

there are very few things i will not listen to. if i haven'thtt already i will certainly try them.

Movies:

such as books, it has to be a winner. i can't stand a plot that i can figure out before the climax of the film.
IF YOU HATE MACS, YOU'LL LOVE THIS

Television:

GAMES

Books:

books are in another category. it has to be well wirtten for me to even consider it. i love the essence of love, passion, tradgedy, politics, poetry, war, and life. fanticitical or monotonous novels are not in my preference.

Heroes:

i had this undying belief; that my greatest hero, or heroin rather, was the one that taught me how to love and in the end, could no longer recognize love herself. but as i see it now; love being placing one's happiness in the happiness of another, and all i have done, and all i have sacrificed, just to see those around me smile; i suppose i am now my greatest catharctic trageody. in my own life, i have learned to love everything as it is, but the one thing i care for most, i can't see happy. real heros are nice people that always finnish last.

My Blog

turning leaves

as i reach the end of my adolessance, i come to the understanding that life is not based so much on self-gratifying indulgance but more over the monotivity that takes place in everyday accordance. i b...
Posted by the teddy bear is dead on Tue, 12 Sep 2006 12:43:00 PST

passionate solitude

forlorn for a loss of words, spoken, i try to find closure within a thought of you, alone, as i am too longing an end to our lives' misfortune. bittered by my own battered spirit, i am comfort...
Posted by the teddy bear is dead on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

whatever happened to seventeen?

when did the day come that i had to grow old how long has it been that i have turned cold i have lost my heart along with all my love to give i dwell, deep on a life worth ...
Posted by the teddy bear is dead on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

if i could only say how much i love you...

in all the times that have went by, casually waiting for something better to say everytime we have ever said good bye, never believing it to be in vain i wonder what would become of us...
Posted by the teddy bear is dead on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

winter being the most depressing time of year....

as this is winter, cold and without passion, i suppose it is not all that uncommon for someone to feel that all that surrounds them is much of the same character. i used to be a happier person, not me...
Posted by the teddy bear is dead on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

closure comes to me, without you

i unerstand now--- the reasons why you left, why you never wrote--- i think i understand you best. i know now--- the thing that you had done, why you never spoke--- i think i know you, all. ...
Posted by the teddy bear is dead on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

i await your return(today, our aniversary)

today was a day i once rejoyced; a day of passion, a day of memories, a day in the past. today is a day to be recounted; a day of sarrow, a day of loss, a day presant. today is our anivers...
Posted by the teddy bear is dead on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

these are the days

these are the days of the endless summer these are the days, the time is now there is no past, there's only future there's only here, there's only now oh your smiling face, your gracious pressen...
Posted by the teddy bear is dead on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

forlorn

i love, and yet i have not love. i weep, and yet i am not wept over. i have lost, as have you. i am forlorn, soon i shall come to you. will you be there; will you comfort me as i have time...
Posted by the teddy bear is dead on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

sorrowful gratitude

often, i look to the heavens, shed a single tear for joy, and another in sorrowful gratitude. it is with great humility that i have found my savior; yet in my humility i know the cost. i know th...
Posted by the teddy bear is dead on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST