Toxic - ProfilesArchive

About Me

New Hampshire born & raised, two years in Providence and two years in Boston since. Wouldn't have left without hearing The Vindictives or seeing so many Troma films. I want a dog, a new bed, apartment of my own and a rise in 6 months.
*Edited four months later; No closer to new apartment, dog raise or bed. Will now settle for a night in your bed, and pet sitting.
*Edited 8 months later; No longer have a job, no need for a raise. Still want a dog.
*Edited 3 months later; Got a great job, don't make as much money, still in the same bed and I almost stole somebody's dog today. His name was Sir Lancealot. Holy crap - I know! But I'm happy.
I'll hear that old piano
from down the avenue
I smell the hot springs
I look around for you
Oh my sweet, sweet old someone
Coming through that door
Its Saturday
The band is playing
Honey, could we ask for more?
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My Interests

Art, women, caffine, whiskey. Heavy bass solos during Queers songs. Big hair. Awesome dogs. Revolutions that don't get written about.

I'd like to meet:

"You got a bad reputation, you're a bad little chicken, thats the word on the street, you're the kinda girl I'd like to meet"

Music:

Lee Hazelwood.
For the most part, thats it.
But. When I was 13 years old I bought a Green Day bumper sticker and vowed that I would slap it on the bumper of my first car. But by the time I got my first car, their albums sucked. I threw out the sticker.
Years later, the put out one of the greatest albums I ever heard. This is why I trust my inner-thirten-year-old-self.
Long after the release of that album I proposed to a girl while listening to Choking Victim (though I wished that I was listening to The Queers). She broke my heart. Stomped on it and ate the arteries. I was burnt on them for years, too, until they put out the best goddamned album I'd heard in a long while. So, Green Day and Choking Victim. Yeah. Take that.

Movies:

METROPOLIS, BRAZIL, TROMA, TROMA, TROMA, REDNECK ZOMBIES, DOG DAY AFTERNOON, SADDEST MUSIC IN THE WORLD, WIZARDS, ORGY OF THE DEAD, HOUSEHOLD SAINTS, POLYESTER, BERT RIGBY, TRUE STORIES, The Professional, DRACULA, FEAR & LOATHING, RUN LOLA RUN, Airplane, CRADLE WILL ROCK, ARTICLE 99, M, NOSFERATU, MONSTER IN A BOX, BREATHLESS, BLUES BROTHERS, DR. STRANGELOVE, SWEET & LOWDOWN, GREMLINS, TROMEO & JULIET, WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER, MONTY PYTHON FILMS, THE TOXIC AVENGER, and so on..

Television:

Troma's Edge TV, F-Troop, West Wing, Get Smart; Fuck Anime (Thats not a show title. Just, really. Fuck Anime)

Books:

Lets not get into this.

Heroes:

Mojo Nixon, Lloyd Kaufman and tons of fictional characters. Oh, and...

My Blog

Friends, don't choke!

A sincere warning to all who may be around my body for any number of reasons; DON'T CHOKE. I have lost my state-certified "Anti-Choke" certification and no longer have the legal authority to he...
Posted by Toxic on Sat, 28 Apr 2007 03:22:00 PST

Too many goddamn screwdrivers.

Not the drink. Come Christmas, each year, my father will give me something "manly." It started with a shaving kit, at age 13, and progressed steadily until I was seventeen or so. Since then, ea...
Posted by Toxic on Thu, 05 Apr 2007 04:31:00 PST

Now thats a hapy little ditty

Through early morning fog I seeVisions of the things to be,The pains that are withheld for me,I realize and I can see... That suicide is painless, ...
Posted by Toxic on Sat, 24 Feb 2007 02:48:00 PST

What are we talkin here..?

What are we talkin here.. 5 years later and I still dig Tiger Army? Yes.
Posted by Toxic on Fri, 23 Feb 2007 08:09:00 PST

,,,,..,....,..,...,...,.,,..,..,.

I've reread this blog, for what might be, the first time, and one thing, comes to mind; I use, an excessive amount, or commas in type, and should, by al rights, be stopped. Help, me, please. ...
Posted by Toxic on Mon, 12 Feb 2007 07:07:00 PST

Girls that gague their ears and stretch their...

...earlobes 3 inches, but won't try anal sex; What the fuck??
Posted by Toxic on Fri, 07 Oct 2005 03:29:00 PST

I'd be a terrible doctor....

I never passed Med. school, though I have numerous references from girls I played doctor with in school. But still, I don't think this is the line of work for me. Really, if I were an MD, and say.....
Posted by Toxic on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

What kind of car did Jesus drive?

A Chrysler!
Posted by Toxic on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

The things I'll never get to try

A common lament that runs through my mind, but rarely comes out of my mouth, concerns the many things I'll never have an oppertunity to try. I'm not referring to climbing mountains, flying jets, or ru...
Posted by Toxic on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Thirty-second Love Affair

She paid with a five-dollar bill, which gave me more than enough time to fantasize. Nothing obscene, mind you. Partially because she was wearing a two-piece athletic suit, as she was in the airport wi...
Posted by Toxic on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST