I wander around, grazing as peacefully as I may, watching life and participating, from time to time. I am said by those who know me to be a highly intelligent and able pervert - indeed, one of some distinction.I enjoy having a highly-developed sense of the ridiculous, and use my horns to burst balloons of pomposity. The same horns are also useful professionally and on the rare occasions when people wave red rags at me.I am innately curious, but practise it with a degree of circumspection and discretion.
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Betty Swollocks
Birthday: 4th November
Birthplace: Premnay-by-Insch
Current Location: Much-Binding-in-the-Marsh
Eye Color: Blue
Hair Color: Brown (formerly Tow)
Height: 6' 2"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Mainly right, but left for some things
Your Heritage: British
The Shoes You Wore Today: None - shorts, tee shirt and bare feet in the office
Your Weakness: Intelligent, attractive women
Your Fears: Wolk
Your Perfect Pizza: D.I.Y. - I make beautiful pizzas
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Catching up with things
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Don't use it
Thoughts First Waking Up: A certain intelligent, attractive woman
Your Best Physical Feature: Modesty forbids. . . . .
Your Bedtime: Whenever, if ever, I get round to it
Your Most Missed Memory: If I have missed it, how can I remember it?
Pepsi or Coke: Neither
MacDonalds or Burger King: Neither
Single or Group Dates: Single - but I enjoy going out as a group
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Just tea (Lady Grey): I'm British, remember?
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla
Cappuccino or Coffee: Either, but I prefer latte
Do you Smoke: No
Do you Swear: Yes - in several languages
Do you Sing: Yes
Do you Shower Daily: Twice
Have you Been in Love: Yes
Do you want to go to College: Been there, done that
Do you want to get Married: Probably
Do you belive in yourself: Increasingly
Do you get Motion Sickness: Not even in a water bed
Do you think you are Attractive: Not for me to say
Are you a Health Freak: No
Do you get along with your Parents: Perfectly - they're both dead
Do you like Thunderstorms: Indeed I do: they're exciting
Do you play an Instrument: The Fool
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: I confess! I confess!
In the past month have you Smoked: Certainly not: nor snorted, nor injected
In the past month have you been on Drugs:
&..39;In the past month have you gone on a Date:' Yes
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: No - no thrills there for me: just boring chainstores
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Not one. Don't think they are for sale in UK
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: No
In the past month have you been on Stage: Of a sort, Yes
In the past month have you been Dumped: No
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Yes
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No
Ever been Drunk: Don't need a drink to enjoy myself, though I like good wine
Ever been called a Tease: Not to my face, anyway
Ever been Beaten up: Only emotionally
Ever Shoplifted: No
How do you want to Die: Quickly, peacefully and painlessly - or perhaps shot by a jealous husband at the age of 150
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Not doing what I do now
What country would you most like to Visit: Wherever piques my fancy at the time. I have been to quite a few already
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Don't care. What matters is the contents of the package, not the wrapping
Favourite Hair Color: Ditto
Short or Long Hair: Ditto
Height: See above, though I have a predilection for taller girls
Weight: See above
Best Clothing Style: See above
Number of Drugs I have taken: Only on prescription: none illegal
Number of CDs I own: A dozen or so: not enough time for casual listening
Number of Piercings: Only in my heart
Number of Tattoos: Edinburgh Tattoo, Aldershot Tattoo, Beating Retreat (various), Royal Tournament and (best of all) Queen's Birthday Parade
Number of things in my Past I Regret: Several
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