Drawing, painting, playing bass, writing, singing, reading, ranting about petty nonsense to anyone who listens (and several of those who don't), playing games such as GTA, Resident Evil, The Suffering, God of War, Rule of Rose, Bioshock, and Silent Hill, raiding, pillaging, being a pirate, watching too many movies, watching the ozone layer waste away one cow fart at a time, pissing off animal rights activists, reading unintentionally sexual labels on the boxes of freight at work, the easter eggs at the ends of some movies after the credits, stuffing missing hookers under my bed, and stockpiling all of my favorite songs on my page with my sweet new playlist. It RULES!
Some will tell you I do stand-up. I will tell you I did it once, last year on Valentine's Day 2007. I did alright, but the ending blew. Also, if you already spend this much time on the internet, you can also visit me at http://vampirefreaks.com/SmilingJack. Or maybe you already have. I wouldn't know, I haven't visited my VampireFreaks page in months.
I'd like to meet:
The bigwigs at Sony, so we could sit down and have a little talk about the price of the PS3. And yes guys, despite what you say it IS a video game system, not a computer device. Just admit that you make video games, it's nothing to be ashamed of. I'd also like to meet Ulli Lommel so I could sit him in a chair, hold his eyes open with prongs, and make him sit through every single one of his movies surrounded by a test audience that hates them and loudly says what's on their minds. I'd like to meet Lindsay Lohan because she sounds like a fun drinking buddy. First one to puke drives, Lindsay! I'd also like to meet Ingrid Newkirk, founder and CEO of PETA, so I could eat a large Hardee's Monster Burger combo in front of her. With curly fries. I'd like to meet Marilyn Manson and have a nice long talk about what made him so emo, and that if he only put some pants on over his fishnets and garter belt I would actually watch his videos. Then I would ask him how much money he's made by including his tired cliche rebellion against religion in every single album he's ever done. I'd love to have lunch with Britney Spears so I could play with my hair in front of her, have dinner with Nicole Ritchie so I could strap her down and hook her up to an IV filled with food because she won't touch any food otherwise, and last but not least, I'd love to meet you. If you've read this far, you're worth meeting. Message me and we'll talk. If you want me to know you read all of this, make the subject say "Read me, I'm awesome!"
You scored as Biting. When it comes to being kinky, your biggest turn on is biting. You love the ectasy of teeth sinking into your flesh, and are probably willing to return the favor. Sex just isn't sex without using your teeth.
Bondage
100%
Biting
100%
Whips
83%
Blood
58%
Chains/Handcuffs
58%
Blind Folds
33%
What's Your Kinky Turn On?
created with QuizFarm.com
What is your Paranormal gift?
Control of Fire You're a little pyro, arn't you? Fire attracts you and you've learned how to control it, or even create that pretty little flicker of red, orange, and blue light. Be careful, though, you could set your friends, family, or even yourself on fire... try doing that to the enemies.
You scored as
Romantic Goth. You are a romantic goth, better known as a traditional goth. You are probably quickly identified as a goth by outsiders. Black lace, bats, and moonlit cemetaries are just a few of your favorite things. Click on my name to take my other tests if you liked this one.
Romantic Goth
92%
Death Rocker
79%
Anything-Goes Goth
71%
Old-school Goth
71%
Fantasy Goth
71%
Industrial/Rivet-Head
63%
Ethereal Goth
54%
Understanding Outsider
54%
Confused Outsider
46%
Perky Goff
38%
Cyber-goth
21%
What subcategory of Goth best fits you?
created with QuizFarm.comYour results:
You are Han Solo
Han Solo
74%
Luke Skywalker
70%
Princess Leia
69%
An Ewok
67%
Padme
64%
R2-D2
61%
Chewbacca
59%
Anakin Skywalker
58%
Boba Fett
58%
Lando Calrissian
57%
Even though you've been described as
reckless, selfish and cocky, you're the
type of person others love to be around.
People like you because you're a scoundrel.
(This list displays the top 10 results out of a possible 21 characters)
Click here to take the Star Wars Personality Quiz
Which Pirates of the Caribbean Character are You?
Jack Sparrow
You're most like Jack Sparrow-CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow. You sometimes lie, cheat, and steal, but in your heart you're a good man, even though you don't always do what's right. You're also a little bit crazy, but people love you for it.
How do you compare?
Take this test! | Tests from TestrifficRob Zombie ~ Living Dead Girl
Add to My Profile | More Videosrob zombie
Add to My Profile | More VideosI'm your Boogie Man
Add to My Profile | More VideosReturn of the Phantom Stranger
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Music:
Pretty much any rock music with an emphasis on symphonic/epic heavy metal. I love Dethklok, the band on the TV show Metalocalypse. Every other band I like that I can think of is as follows and I quote: Project 86 (best band ever!), GWAR, Clutch, Nightwish, Evanesence, 30 Seconds to Mars, Tommy Lee, KISS, Aerosmith, Nirvana, Avenged Sevenfold, Powerman 5000, Rob Zombie, White Zombie, The Ramones, Leave's Eyes, Far-Less, Demon Hunter, Living Sacrifice, Flyleaf, Everclear, (old) Metallica, Andrew W.K., Fight Paris, H.I.M., The 69 Eyes, Linkin Park, Midnight Syndicate, Korn, Johnny Cash, Linkin Park, Green Day, Killswitch Engage, Scum of the Earth, Rammstein, Sum 41, Iron Maiden, Ill Nino, Deadsy, Tony C and the Truth, Breaking Benjamin, Sloth, The Dropkick Murpheys, Dark New Day, The Offspring, DragonForce, Lordi, Dimmu Borgir, Amon Amarth, Devin Townsend (ZILTOID!!), Sonata Arctica, Within Temptation, and a bunch of others I can't think of at the moment.
Movies:
Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, King Kong, Pirates of the Caribbean, X-Men, Spider-Man, Saw (1 and 2), Sin City, The Hills Have Eyes, Cabin Fever, The Exorcist, Spawn, Resident Evil, SLC Punk, The Shining, Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Land of the Dead, 28 Days Later 28 Weeks Later, The Breakfast Club, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Corpse Bride, Big Fish, Batman Begins, Mars Attacks, Freddy vs Jason, Donnie Darko, Terminator, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, The Jacket, Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, Blazing Saddles, Spaceballs, Shrek, Men in Black, Hoodwinked, Monster House, Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back, 2001 Maniacs, Andre The Butcher, Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, Snatch, Transformers, and probably some others I forgot.
Television:
I rarely watch TV, usually I stick to movies. But when I do watch shows, it's one of the following: Family Guy, Roseanne, Invader ZIM, South Park, Viva La Bam, Wildboyz, Jackass, Metalocalypse, and stand-up comedy. My favorite comedians are Paul Hooper, the Disgruntled Clown, Bill Hicks, Dane Cook, Patton Oswalt, and George Carlin.
Books:
Harry Potter series, Cell, Salem's Lot, The Zombie Survival Guide, Lord of the Rings, Septimus Heap, Lemony Snicket (would have put it up there with the movies, but the movie SUCKED), Dracula, Dead in Dixie, House of Leaves, The Da Vinci Code, Angels & Demons, The Alphabet of Manliness, Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles, World War Z, Only revolutions, H.P. Lovecraft and some others I no doubt forgot.
Heroes:
First and foremost my number one friend Brittany, who is the reigning goddess of all things sick, twisted, and offensive from Hurricane Katrina jokes to nauseating comment images. My Mom for remembering everything I don't, Sarah for being the mother figure I can tell everything I can't tell my mom, Salvador Dali for showing me that even wierdos like me have a place in this world, Captain Jack Sparrow for showing me exactly how many girls out there LOVE wierdos like me, Project 86 for being the greatest band ever, and J.K. Rowling for keeping me and other nerd-wackos busy the rest of the time. Dethklok for keeping it metal. Oh yeah, and Paul Hooper for not being afraid to say it.And lastly, I must include a special spot for Rob Zombie. Rob, if you're reading this -- fat chance, I know -- I think you rule and I want to grow up to be just like you. Except those dreads you used to rock. Those looked mighty uncomfortable. Plus if I ever got them, I could never keep a day job. But anywho, please come down here and fly me away from all this rural mess. First class, please. Thanks!AND NOW, MY LIST OF VILLAINS AND/OR ENEMIES: Extremists of any kind, animal rights activists (that's different from animal welfare, by the way... Animal welfare activists are of sound mind), people who hate things (God, myspace, the establishment) just because it's cool to hate stuff, people who go out and rush to buy new electronic items as soon as they come out (Remember when the first PS2s exploded, people?), girls who get sick twisted pleasure off of leading a guy on, girls who only date dickhead guys and then rant about how all guys are jerks (you asked for it), emo kids, and anyone who gets in the way of my master plan to take over the world using an army of shotgun-wielding redneck zombies.
