I'd like to meet:
No one. Well, if you insist, how about, ummm, some good writers. Like Paul Auster, Caitlin Kiernan, Walter Mosely, Nancy Farmer, smart novelists like that. And their non-fiction counterparts: Malcolm Gladwell, Anne Lamott, David Hockney (whose own art does little for me, but y'gotta love the way he explains art)! And, of course, the fiercefemmes (TM) Oriana Fallaci and Molly Ivans ... if they hadn't both just died. Life seems expecially tough on gutsy women I admire. Sigh.
I think the rule with me is they not only have to be smarter and more talented than I am, but, and it's a BIG but (though the skirt hides it well), I have to able to ADMIT it. And since I'm a writer, I've got the experience to know when a fellow scribe is (clears throat) smart...er and more--uh, y'know--than I am.
Now, let's keep this between the two of us, but I also suspect there are folks in other fields of artistic endeavor who could also whup my ass (the one under the skirt) in a fair-fought brain-off--AND have talents I can't begin to compete with. People like ..arian Kevin Brownlow, who taught the world that silent films are a different and no less important art form than what came after sound. Or Jon Stewart, whose "fake news" and silly interviews with important people get to more truth than anything "serious television journalists" are doing. Or Jonathan Coulton, who writes hilarious songs that stick in your head because they're actually--gasp!--really good music. And then there's harpist/wailer Joanna Newsom and that pixie Bjork, two whose space-alien-like abilities make competition with me (or any other human) useless.
Okay. Guess I
would like to meet a few people. Maybe even
YOU.
Music:
Oh wow, am I slow on the pickup. I just realized that with the (relatively) new MySpace music player, I can "honor" every ONE of the musicians I've selected as Friends by putting a song by each of them available for your convenient selection, as they say. (Just remember to turn off the song already playing before going into my Song History.) I can also vary which one is gonna ride over whatever the hell it is you're ALREADY playing on your puter ... and will do so, at regular intervals. So to all of you who've welcomed the silence here: TUFF LUCK, BABY!
More about the music you're hearing (or turning off) once I've loaded something by everyone sometime in the next week...which will come to over half my self-imposed limit of 111 Friends. Guess this once again proves that I came to MySpace mostly to find music, old and new, that gets to me ... which, as you'll see from those in my Song History, ranges from from stuff you may well have heard, like Jill Sobule’s cheerful odes to depression and the neo-lounge stylings of Jamie Cullum to songs you probably haven’t, like Chasidic rap from Nosson, strange wit from Mailbox, inscrutibility from Japan’s Alone Together, clever mashups from Austrailia’s Team 9, raw punk from Spain’s A Pedir de Milkhouse and refreshingly different latin jazz from Brazil’s Bruno Oliveira. And let’s not forget that SHOOBY TAYLOR (aka The Human Trumpet) IS GOD.
(I must admit, though, that the reason I've actually STAYED on MySpace has to do with those few odd ducks who actually LIKE to communicate, leaving comments for me to laugh and/or shake my head over and, on occasion, actually reading my blog and, on rarer occasion, actually reacting to it. You know who you are.)
Movies:
Look, I write about movies to make my living. I talk movies day and night: Blah, blah, blah, blah. Blah. Hear all that pretentious chatter? So, when I set up a website with my reviews, I'll let you know. Until then, back off, huh? Unless, of course, you wanna buy a girl a present... ;
Tell ya what...I'll send you a list of my recent and all-time favorites if you email me after watching MySpace(ial) Friend Spicy Mac's hilariously weird 25-minute, award-winning, action-film parody FRENCH BOMBER DETECTIVE (streaming in three segments at his website www.wing14.com...and I suggest you let each stream download in a seperate window before you watch, cause you ain't gonna wanna have'ta wait between parts).
Bizarrely spoofing every cliche of j(as-in-Japanese)-pop, euro-shlock and the brother-&-sister(ish) team formerly known as the Warchowski Brothers, it's funnier than the baby orangutan that Spicy uses as his icon...and there's darn little that's funnier than a baby orangutan. (That's a rule of the universe. Look it up.) If the dazzingly surreal special effects and strange dialogue--which happens to be
EXACTLY the way Spicy speaks IRL--don't have you on the floor, you won't want my film picks, anyway.
Television:
I used to work in television.
That cured me.
Heroes:
THIS SPACE AVAILABLE. APPLY TO LEASEHOLDER.
