Wiscon-Ron profile picture

Wiscon-Ron

This guy asked me if I had any cheese, knowing that I was originally from Wisconsin. So I kicked him

About Me

This commercial really speaks to me as I too have a beard combover.
I work around 75 hours a week. I don't take days off. It's pretty neat.
Gotta support the team . Boo Cubs. Boo .
What Famous Leader Are You?

Am I really a Bill Clinton? I think this test might be a little off-base. But what the hell --better than scoring a " Hitler ."
Brain Lateralization Test Results
Right Brain (60.4%) The right hemisphere is the visual, figurative , artistic, and intuitive side of the brain.
Left Brain (39.6%) The left hemisphere is the logical , articulate, assertive, and practical side of the brain.
Are You Right or Left Brained?(word pair test)
Eysenck's Test Results
Extraversion (59%) moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity.
Neuroticism (37%) moderately low which suggests you are relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.
Psychoticism (73%) high which suggests you are overly selfish, uncooperative, and difficult at the expense too often of the well being of others.
Take Eysenck Personality Test (similar to EPQ-R)
I AM GOING TO KILL YOU. Just kidding.
Career Inventory Test Results
Extroversion ||||||||||||||| 50%
Emotional Stability ||||||||||||||||||||| 70%
Orderliness |||||||||||| 40%
Altruism ||||||||| 30%
Inquisitiveness |||||||||||||||||||||||| 76%

You are an Architect , possible professions include - strategic planning , writer , staff development, lawyer , robber baron, architect, software designer, financial analyst , pirate captain , college professor , photographer, logician, artist, systems analyst, neurologist , physicist, psychologist, research/development specialist, janitor , computer programmer, data base manager, chemist, biologist , investigator.
You are Batman

You are dark, love gadgets, and have vowed to help the innocent not suffer the pain you have endured . You are the greatest superhero ever. All other superheros are crap by comparison. Furthermore, your batcave is powered by an "atomic pile." Boo-yah.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz
Whatever happened to Batgirl? Until recently I had no idea that the original Batwoman had been eaten alive by a metal tiger sometime during the late 1970s . Bummer .Metaphors are neat.

What Classic Movie Are You?

I could never get this stuff in Wisconsin for whatever reason, but I can get Schlitz 12 packs for $5.99 in the Bronx/Yonkers fairly easily. My new favorite cheap-as-shit-beer. I highly recommend it. Just look at how blitzed this guy is for Christ's sake. Get Blitzed with Schlitz- the Beer that Made Milwaukee Famous. Schaefer is a pretty good bet when nary a Schlitz is to be found .

My hands-down-favorite President of the United States of America is CHESTER A. ARTHUR . My parents live on a street named in his honor. In fact, I'm such a huge fan of his that I campaigned for him in 2004. Afterall, let's face facts- the only good president is a dead president .
The status quo can go take a flying f*** at a rolling doughnut. Bruce Springsteen is a douchebag. Bob Dylan is a hack.
I never say that I am "waiting on line." Instead, I prefer "waiting in line." In place of the more-or-less standard "drinking fountain, or "water fountain" I say "bubbler." And no, a bubbler is not necessarily a bong. If one refers to a carbonated drink generically as either a "pop" or a "coke" I am more inclined to think them some sort of hillbilly.
A Bubbler (made of solid gold ).

Generally, I tend to say that the glass is half empty -- half empty because you drank my half . I would appreciate it if you gave it back. However, there are cases where the glass is indubitably half full . For example--when a nude autumnal sprite is filling your glass with some variant of roofie-colada [see below].


My Interests

Laughing , Running, Riding Bikes, Noncommercial Radio , the Mythology of the Wild Man , Facial Hair Studies, Dystopia , Political Philosophy, American Studies, History of Colonialism , Facial Hair Competitions , Film, Beer ( Blatz and BEYOND), Bourbon (the cheaper the better), Gin, Old Country Music, Cheese Curds , Hardcore/Metal, Classical, Trumpeting / Bugling , playing the guitar as loudly and as poorly as possible , Peace and Justice, TRUTH, My (ex)GF Lulu-gamorph , The Great Outdoors , American Pride , Literature, Doing Nothing, Riding Trains , the History of Fashion , Progressive Politicking , Drunken Bowling , Radio Drama , hiking, time , pretending to known Latin grammar, Surrealist Art , Disturbing the Peace, Ironic Crap Relating to Jesus H. Christ , Building Fires, New Plungers, Taking Stupid Risks, Slapping Hands...

100 proof Schnapps - I'm partial to both the Root Beer and Peppermint varieties. You just can't find quality schnapps in NoBro (the North Bronx ).

I'd like to meet:

Friends & Neighbors of Yesteryear, C.H.U.D. s, Suicidal Melancholics, the Drunk & Disorderly, Dive Bar Patrons, Law School Dropouts, Graduate School Burnouts, People Who Hate Cell Phones (specifically the Motorola V276 ), Business Jerks of America, Happy-Time Harry , "Iron Man" Wang , Javelinas

Music:

Pretty much anything either vaguely GRIND or STONER in nature... Tony Danza Tap Dance Extravaganza , The Red Chord , Coalesce, Botch, Swarm of the Lotus , Engineer , Hum, Converge , Pavement, Old Time Relijun , Decapitated, Pig Destroyer , ZEPPELIN, Tomahawk, KYUSS, WEEN , REO Speedealer, pg. 99 , Ascension, Helmet, the Dead Kennedys, the Carrie Nations, Curlupanddie , Dying Fetus, Mr. Bungle , REFUSED, the Locust, The End, Architect, The Network, the Kinks, Ion Dissonance, Horse the Band , Rollins Band, Discordance Axis , Harvest, Glass Casket, Between the Buried and Me , Fugazi, Fu Manchu, The Darkness , Snapcase, Danzig , Creation is Crucifixion , Eyes Upon Separation, Charles Bronson, Eyehategod , Superjoint Ritual , Hank Williams III, Bleed, IfIhadahifi, End of All, Ed Gein , Don Caballero, Human Remains, Deadwater Drowning, Psyopus, Will Haven, Cave In, Buried Inside , The Blinding Light, Black Sabbath, Ufomammut , Clutch, Beck , Analog, Harlots, Into the Moat, the MELVINS, Queen, the Velvet Underground, Calexico, Akron / Family , Hank Williams, Johnny Bond, J. Cash, Tennessee Ernie Ford, Marty Robbins, the Sons of the Pioneers , Gene Autry, Jimmie Rodgers, Hank Thompson, Bob Atcher, Randy Boone, Gershwin, Copland, JS Bach, Handel, Mozart, etc, etc, etc.

Movies:

Borat: Cultural Learnings of America For Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan , Blue Velvet, Buffalo 66, A Clockwork Orange, the Grapes of Wrath, Citizen Kane, Beyond the Valley of the Dolls , Bottle Rocket, Rushmore, The Royal Tenenbaums, the Life Aquatic, any and all Marx Bros. films, Barry Lyndon, Paths of Glory, Full Metal Jacket, Dr. Strangelove..., Apocalypse Now (both versions), Pulp Fiction, Kill Bill, Resevoir Dogs, Jackie Brown, The Big Lebowski, 1984, Lolita, Paths of Glory, Spellbound, Rope, Strangers on a Train, Confess, North by Northwest, Dial M for Murder, Notorious, Suspicion, The Big Lebowski, Metropolis, Mulholland Drive, Twin Peaks: Fire Walk with Me, Wild at Heart, Mars Attacks!, Eraserhead, Easy Rider,
The Magic Christian American Movie, Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas, Fargo, Yojimbo, Snatch, Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, Kids, The Good the Bad and the Ugly, For a Fistful of Dollars, For a Few Dollars More, Once Upon a Time in the West, Once Upon a Time in America, Gosford Park, Harold and Maude, Planet of the Apes, Batman (1966 film- Adam West As Batman And Burt Ward As Robin Together With All Their Fantastic Derring-Do And Their Dastardly Villains, Too!), etc. One Man's Hero (one of the best bad movies out there)

Television:

Arrested Development , the original BATMAN television series, Family Guy, the Kids in the Hall , the original AVENGERS television show, Alfred Hitchcock Presents, the Twilight Zone, the original GREEN HORNET television show, South Park, The Kids in the Hall, Newsradio, The Office, HOUSE, Red Dwarf , Sealab 2021, Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Books:

Aldous Huxley- complete works ; George Orwell- complete works ; Moby Dick; or The Whale ; Cormac McCarthy's Blood Meridian and The Border Trilogy; Zamiatin's We and his short stories; House of Leaves ; Leviathan ; Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding ; Catch 22, K. Vonnegut-complete works ; Babbitt ; Franz Kafka-complete works; Chuck Palahniuk-complete works; Last Exit to Brooklyn; H.L. Mencken's Prejudices ; Hermann Hesse-complete works; the plays of Christopher Marlowe ; James Joyce- complete works ; Hunter S. Thompson-complete works; Bellamy's Looking Backward ; Dreiser's An American Tragedy ; some H.G. Wells ; some Mark Twain ; very early science fiction i.e. Steam-Man of the Prairies ; Bertrand Russell's History of Western Philosophy; etc.

Heroes:

H.L. Mencken , Eugene Victor Debs , Batman, Tom Joad

My Blog

C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week XI

Above we find the C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week (or CHUDABAW for short). I love this commercial.  Today I watched it for the first time since seein...
Posted by Wiscon-Ron on Mon, 05 Feb 2007 10:20:00 PST

C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week X

Above we find the C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week (or CHUDABAW for short). I could attempt to make some pun about Ethel Merman, but then again, fuck that noise. The ad speak...
Posted by Wiscon-Ron on Fri, 12 Jan 2007 06:14:00 PST

PANTS OPTIONAL RADIO LIVES!! (for one night and then it dies again)

PANTS OPTIONAL RADIORETURNING TO THE ETHER FOR ONE NIGHT & ONE NIGHT ONLYON WSUM 91.7 FM MADISON"THE SNAKE ON THE LAKE"LISTEN LIVE OR ONLINEWEDNESDAY 12/27/0610PM-12AM(Central Standard Time)...
Posted by Wiscon-Ron on Wed, 27 Dec 2006 05:51:00 PST

C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week IX

Above we find the C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week (or CHUDABAW for short).Does anyone know where I can get my hands on some "Viking-inspired drinking horns"?  I only wan...
Posted by Wiscon-Ron on Fri, 08 Dec 2006 09:05:00 PST

C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week VIII

Above we find the C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week (or CHUDABAW for short).   Where is she now?     [...]     Fuckin' C.H.U.D.s....
Posted by Wiscon-Ron on Fri, 17 Nov 2006 11:52:00 PST

C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week VII

Above we find the C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week (or CHUDABAW for short).   This man is without a doubt going to shoot his female companion (just look at the dog's expre...
Posted by Wiscon-Ron on Fri, 10 Nov 2006 09:50:00 PST

C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week VI

Above we find the C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week (or CHUDABAW for short). The CHUDABAW from a couple of weeks back begged the question, and it has been one hell of a lon...
Posted by Wiscon-Ron on Fri, 03 Nov 2006 12:21:00 PST

C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week V

Above we find the C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week (or CHUDABAW for short). "Brewed with the water best for brewing."  That is to say, water that is pee-free. Hey, if it i...
Posted by Wiscon-Ron on Thu, 26 Oct 2006 10:03:00 PST

C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week IV

Above we find the C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week (or CHUDABAW for short). "Man Size Pleasure?"  juxtaposed with a man guiltily taking out the 'ol figure skates is t...
Posted by Wiscon-Ron on Fri, 20 Oct 2006 10:09:00 PST

C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week III

Above we find the C.H.U.D.ly Alcoholic Beverage Advertisement of the Week (or CHUDABAW for short).This is an advertisement for Country Club Malt Liquor, a malt liquor ("masculine cousin" to the wussie...
Posted by Wiscon-Ron on Thu, 12 Oct 2006 12:12:00 PST