Ass Hat profile picture

Ass Hat

Melting the world one face at a time

About Me

Let's get something straight from the get go. If you're sappy, emo, a WoW freak, a tool bag, dressed in tart like clothing, a sissy, a douchebag, a light weight (allow me to elaborate on this; if you can't work a ten hour shift, play a game of football/soccer/basketball and get home and drink for at LEAST three hours, you're a light weight). Moving on. A person who uses -izzle, racist, or someone who uses others as emotional tampons, then you're going to be ridiculed mercilessly. I hate all of the above and have a "zero tolerance" policy on all of them. Then again, you probably wouldn't be on my friends list if you were any of these. I'd rather fellate a hot curling iron than deal with this stuff. On a happier note, I'm pretty amazing.

My Interests

Sleeping...yea, that interests me a lot. Oh, and zombie flicks.

I'd like to meet:

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Music:

ACDC and Buckethead top the charts. KISS, Thirty Seconds to Mars, Buckethead, Panic at the Disco, Saves the Day, The Killers, Fall Out Boy, Breaking Benjamin, Armor for Sleep, Ludacris, Eminem, Dr. Dre, 50 Cent, Modest Mouse, Hinder, Reggie and the Full Effect, Children of Bodom, and Lacuna Coil.

Movies:

300 is number 1! V for Vendetta, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Boiler Room, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Mall Rats, Queen of the Damned, Training Day, American Beauty, Dawn of the Dead, The Girl Next Door (Elisha Cuthbert is a goddess!), The Butterfly Effect, Se7en, and The Usual Suspects, Inside Man, The Warriors.

Television:

Family Guy and Robot Chicken. Kinda diggin that Beauty and the Geek show too.

Books:

" I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell" by Tucker Max "The Alphabet of Manliness" by Maddox

Heroes:

Dad, Kelley, P.T. Barnum

My Blog

Vegas stomps ass

I would simply like to say that Vegas for the new year was absolutely and undeniably THE place to be.  I have to hand it to the group I went with for providing laughs without pause and drunken ma...
Posted by Mikeyavelli on Thu, 04 Jan 2007 11:40:00 PST

Misadventures of Modjeska

    Ok, so I thought this night would kinda be shrugged off and forgotten like most of my nights out at a bar, but I feel that this little adventure would be best written down so people...
Posted by Mikeyavelli on Sun, 05 Nov 2006 10:05:00 PST

Guess who's going to Iraq?!

    I guess this recruitmilitary.com thing finally paid off big time for me.  I got an e-mail from some guy named Roger (I don't remember his last name except that it starts with a...
Posted by Mikeyavelli on Sun, 22 Oct 2006 05:08:00 PST

My Not Quite Zombie Experience

     For everyone who knows me and/or has read my profile, it should be pretty obvious that I have an obsession with anything dealing with zombies.  Except for the movie "Land...
Posted by Mikeyavelli on Wed, 06 Sep 2006 09:35:00 PST

Cancer vaccine: Scapegoat for shitty parenting

       Ladies and gents, there are a couple of issues that I wish to address regarding a recent scientific advance.  I apologize prior to my rant and warn you all that this ma...
Posted by Mikeyavelli on Mon, 12 Jun 2006 05:59:00 PST

Tidbits of Doom + Friends = :(

     Hokay, so, I have decided that I should start a string of blogs detailing the completely senseless acts in my life.  And today's story comes from San Angelo, TX in the fo...
Posted by Mikeyavelli on Wed, 19 Apr 2006 10:07:00 PST

How did I make it this far?

 I dunno why I thought of this, but I did and now I wanna write it out and see what people think of this one.  I warn you, it may not be as funny as my other stories.  In fact, it's not...
Posted by Mikeyavelli on Sun, 26 Feb 2006 06:45:00 PST

Philosophy of duty to state

So I was reading more of the philosophy book I got and I wrote out a HUGE blog about the entire chapter I read. Problem is that when I tried to post it, it disappeared. But I think it's necessary th...
Posted by Mikeyavelli on Mon, 19 Dec 2005 07:46:00 PST

We don't love them hos

The following is an e-mail going around NYC...and now California and now Atlanta...and now Rhode Island...and now Mississippi... and now Massachusetts.... and now Arizona...and now Georgia... The 1st...
Posted by Mikeyavelli on Wed, 14 Dec 2005 02:32:00 PST

On Philosophy and other things

So as of late, it's become harder for me to be completely happy about things. Not that I'm depressed or anything.  I'm content...just not happy like I used to be I guess.   Therefore, in an ...
Posted by Mikeyavelli on Sun, 04 Dec 2005 08:03:00 PST