The Grace in Being Doomed |
Totally doomed.We are a plague ship! We knew our rein of enthusiastic mediocre seamanship would come crashing down on us. But a plague?! We were all banking on the Coasties to dig plastic cuffs into o...
Posted by Elmo on Sun, 30 Mar 2008 08:31:00 PST |
Dinner, HPV, and a bus ride (see also: how to write me a letter) |
Back to sea, yes indeed!I wanted to see Dylan and Andy before I left but my mum took me out to dinner and also gave me the last of a series in HPV immunicy shots. Yes? Thanks mum? And I didn't get tho...
Posted by Elmo on Tue, 19 Feb 2008 05:48:00 PST |
The Brave Little Toaster + Other Vignettes |
Should I be angry at myself or at the cute pea-green bottle caps that advertise Full Sail LTD Ale on the topside and "LIVE THE DREAM" on the beer-soaked underside? At 6.3% alcohol by volume it could b...
Posted by Elmo on Fri, 18 Jan 2008 03:59:00 PST |
Letter to PDX postdated a fortnight ago |
Dear Portland,Yeah. We're through. It's the break-up letter you never got. No, everyone is still too enamoured with you to give you one. It's easy to see why. You lured us in with promises of superfun...
Posted by Elmo on Sat, 05 Jan 2008 10:47:00 PST |
I think in Professional Drinking circles its called a Bender. |
Stamps on yr wrists, like suicide scars, remind you of times when. It's the big bonus of being a dirty kid. Wild and unwashed hair as a symbol of times had and had well, an affinity for action which l...
Posted by Elmo on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 10:31:00 PST |
Is it that kind of day? |
A day where idleness wears a crown?I will call all of you back in turn, Meg will get her letter, and maybe I'll put a shirt on (that poor eight year old girl caused me to put pants on).Until then then...
Posted by Elmo on Sat, 01 Dec 2007 03:49:00 PST |
So there we were. Just me, the mailman, and my prick. |
By noon I was doin' great. Not only had I stuck to my guns about not putting on pants until at least two but I had also managed to suck down a metric fuck-ton of coffee. All amp'd up and nowhere to be...
Posted by Elmo on Thu, 06 Sep 2007 12:29:00 PST |
"Drink some more champagne, this is gonna hurt." |
Six months of livin' on the drink, literally and figuratively, go figure. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! I know y'all have heard it already, "I'm comin' home!" A little time on the hard is gonna be good for this k...
Posted by Elmo on Fri, 24 Aug 2007 07:50:00 PST |
Eh, pox? |
What the hell is it? A rash, spotz, fungus, jock itch gone migratory for the winter, or - perhaps! - a pox! Oh dear oh dear oh dreary dear! Spotz, red and white, are creeping up my right arm from the ...
Posted by Elmo on Sat, 17 Feb 2007 12:00:00 PST |
Bright Ideaz for Eager Mindz |
North Portland is in need of new commercial blood! I mean, JEZUZ, how often can you buy yr kid fashionable dudz at Black Wagon? Shiiitttt, why doesn't someone put in a second childrens boutique?! Mahn...
Posted by Elmo on Fri, 17 Nov 2006 10:45:00 PST |
