Lets see where do I start? Im very interested in the random and abstract. Every time I go to a Sushi restaurant, I bring my own fork because I cant figure out how to use the god damn chopsticks. I think people that take a shit before checking to see if they have any toilet paper left are pretty fuckin retarded. I have tried my whole fucking life to eat a bag of M&M’s without dropping ONE out of the bag, but somehow I always fucking do it, no matter how hard I try not to. I always wondered why cats just stare at you for like 30 minutes if you catch them while their licking their ass. Anybody know? Everybody always says shit like "Dont Hate" Or "Your Just Jealous Of Me". Well, I Can eat whatever the hell I want and not gain an OUNCE. Now who the fucks jealous? I love fake breasts, but when women with fake cans breastfeed, how the fuck does the milk get through the silicone? What gives chicks that are absolutely hideous with bad attitudes to boot the right to wear cut-off t-shirts that say "Princess" or "I Taught Your Boyfriend That Thing You Like"? The only gals that have the right to wear stuff like that are women like Pamela Anderson. And sweetie, your way fucking off from being Pamela Anderson. You’re more like Rosie O’Donnells shit after Thanksgiving Dinner. On that note, I dont even believe that beautiful women TAKE shits. That would just take so much away from their beauty. I STILL eat kids cereal. Something about seeing a bunch of colored marshmellows drowning in a bowl of cold milk gets my day started off mighty chipper for some reason!!!! When I die, I want them to take my ashes, give them to Ozzy Ozbourne, and tell him that they are cocaine. Do retarded people go to hell since they cant profess their love to the Lord? That would be pretty fucked up, God. I love old people. I love my barbie girls too, all tatted and bronzed and pierced up...any woman that is that hot is ABSOLUTELY worth spending the rest of my life working 60 hours a week while she sits at home and orders shit off Home Shopping Network all day. Im just kiddin Barbies. You know I love you =) Why the hell is Magic Johnson still alive? Hasnt he had AIDS for like 30 years? I dunno. Thats crazy. Life is crazy. LIVE YOUR LIFE CRAZY!!!!!HAHAHAHAHHAAH I LOVE ALL OF YALLS!!!!! V V
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