Im 13 year old, going to be 14 in july.Frankly I hate life, and some might probably not, know me or heard of Javier's little sister, (
[email protected])
Well im nothing like javy, I don't see the world as he does.
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Im in 8th grade, and i hate it. I think everyone is just trying to out run everyone else, it's short of funny to see everyone so bitchy just trying to make it to the top, well thats jr. high for ya. I don't see myself as anything really, im not a prep, not a skater (lol.) not a punk or geek or anything really, I just see me as me, and if others dont think so, well then they can go fuck them selfs. (no offence.)Most people around me tell me things I already know, mostly my mom and my family. I hate them all right now, because they don't try to know me better, and always tell the bad before the good. I mean really would you rather know what your doing right or have a big piece of bullshit layed down in front of you? But they dont see that.
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The only thing I have in common with my family, is that im bitchy. thats about it, I have other things but like javy, i dont like to share my thoughts, I dont keep a journal, i think what happens happens, and you should remember things that your mind recalls. Journals to me are just books that keep things, for all the world to see, (thats another reason i hate my family, they all read what i write.) I don't think that I will ever be good at anything either....Changing the subject.
I play the guitar, but i envy my brother alot, because he can play it good. I can't because im not a fast learner, and i can't memorize things that well. I also envy my brothers body, (type,) My mom always tells me, that You have to lose weight, i mean I dont want you to end up like delia(my other sister,) I like the way I am, i mean if people cant see through the skin, well then I think there just big assholes. I think my mom actually made it so im so bitchy, i mean I use to go outside alot, until she told me I was fat, I didnt like ti to much, and i felt like i couldn't go outside, because if i did, she would point in laugh at me. Thats how I see my mom, a big jerk who never tells the good. My dad is a little bit better, but not to far from the tree.
Javy, well I wont tell much about javy's point of view, because it would probably ruin his rep.
None of my friends see me at a cow, but i guess familys are worse then friends.
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Many times I've thought of running away, from all the discomfort, but instead I write poetry, i think that i can express my way better that way. I dont like sharing my poetry with my family, because i dont think they deserve to see it. I will someday.One of these days i want to scream at my family, and tell them everything they did, but I can't everytime i come close to I start to cry, because i know what they will do.
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ANYWAYS, I love the bands my brother listens to... about everyone. I think javy's band is cool, i mean they get rich and famous, the families get rich and famous...j/k....no i take that back.....not kidding.....I will be famous...YAY.
I think my favorite band, that no matter what other band comes is, The Early November, I think they just have good lyrics, and a great toon.
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Im not very reglious either, i mean i dont think we sould judge eachother on what we believe in. THATS ONE REASON I HATE UTAH, full of mormons who think there religon is the all powerful (no offence to those who are mormons, well some of them.)
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I have not yet had a boyfriend. mainly because im just a friend type. and its Jr high, i mean any fucking guy can say I love you... I mean its not that hard DUH.
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I dont like posers, and that is what springville jr. high is filled with, those who want, and those who can never be. I mean there are really nice punks out there, preps and stuff. but im not one of them. I am me, and im nothing more and nothing less.
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FURTURE CAUSE......PREPS RULE HIGH SCHOOL.....NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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I wish i could state
all that is on my mind
but that would mean staying up longer
more then a life time
things I ponder,
and wonder for that matter
most won't get me
most won't try
but holy fuck i'd give them another time.
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Is she alive? (poem)Her thoughts were smoothher dreams were greatthose stars that helped her communicatei hated to see her falli hated to see the cuts on her armsa face lost in the moon lightthat shined so brightyou didnt know if it was real.She never gave upshe never took the lower roadno one really knew herbut they tryed to knowshe never let anyone inhiding from her pastshe just wants to get along with everyoneand last.she never thought of failingshe never thought of winningbut her mind was settled on one thingshe would tryand thats why she still liesin her bed, breathingand livingthe cuts on her armsfade awayand the girl with the upturned faceis strongand dealing with anything that comes her way.
