Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind).

About Me

I am as plain, generic, standard, store-brand as they come, with some sporadic, candy-coated sprinkles. Don't expect more than what's laid out infront of you and then maybe you'll catch on. Probably not though. There's reasons why I don't make new friends easily, or at all for that matter.
I have no purpose or goals to strive for in this life and I'll be the first to tell you that.
I don't drive because I have close to zero depth-perception, and I'm paranoid and paranoid of taking extreme control of things.
I consider myself a realist but I'm stubborn towards optimistic possibilities.
I take affection and validation usually when I can get them but hardly ever without a degree of suspicion or remorse.
I've painted myself into a corner so many times that looking at the same walls has become a comfort and a guilty pleasure.
I can be delusional so maybe none of this is right. (Or maybe being wrong is the delusion.)
I also tend to find myself as the well-intentioned-but-gullible-asshole who tries too hard to get close to people who'd much rather have others around rather than be there to understand--and then make asses of themselves, me, and everyone else in the process.
Uhh... and I have two matching sets of moles in the shape of the constellation of Orion.. or the Big Dipper. Yeah....
Also let it be known that I hold grudges--and a lot of them.

My Interests

Obsessively checking and rechecking AIM profiles and Aways.
Listening to shitty music--and no, not the "good kind" of shitty.
Forming somewhat-thought-out opinions and views in vain attempts to cope.
Reading people correctly (atleast partially at times).
Denying my own gut instincts and then questioning the second-guessing of those thoughts.
Intently daisychaining from person to person, profile to profile.
Kitty cats--specifically my very own Asshole.
Bad photography--again, specificaly my own.
Box Handling.
Ebay'ng for things I really don't need but can't stop searching for.
Finding pants that actually fit (it's a lot more of a quest than you would think).
"Half-sex" e,e ...not to mention spooning.
Girls with raccoon-eyes (natural or Covergirl-manufactured). Mmmm.
Trying to figure out why I can't ever just leave it alone since none of it ever works out.

I'd like to meet:

This girl, this girl riiiiight here: ;D
(I'd like to thank Renae for finding that one.)

In life, someone who doesn't come off as walking ignorance, arrogance and doesn't curl into a ball-of-spiked-insecurity if you disagree with them and point it out. Some morals are nice, too--but not too many, and it's not necessarily a requirement.
As far as MySpace goes (aka The Center of The Internet Universe) I thought I could take a stab and guesstimate a number that sounded right to weed-out the friend whores but really, it's a percentage: if you don't communicate in any way, size, shape, or form with atleast half of your friends' list (and don't atleast KNOW the other half via the ever-shrinking world outside of MySpace) then you're a friend whore, or you're just a random person who's trying to recruit into your faceless masses and chances are, without a bit of coercion you're not going to get anywhere here with that and, you need to leave this page. Like now.

NOTE: IF I DON'T KNOW YOU ALREADY, CHANCES ARE, I PROBABLY DON'T WANT TO. FIGURE ME FOR AN "ELITIST ASSHOLE", BUT REALLY, I'M JUST THAT FEARFUL AND ANTI-SOCIAL. THINGS ARE SAFER THAT WAY--FOR EVERYONE INVOLVED, TRUST ME. AND THANKS.

PS. Anyone who says/agrees-with the cliched line of "living life to the fullest," yeah, you need to go away as well and in my opinion are probably just afraid of stabalizing your life long enough to get real priorities (says the kettle).
Now here's a not-so-original idea, I'm posting some of the things I've chosen as favorites from DeviantArt, here's the current one and it changes... whenever:
Zombie by GlitterGel

Music:

Unlike the norm, I'm taking a pseudo-stand here and not listing every single damn band/artist that I listen to for a handful of tracks--if that...damnit.
The following is probably the few bands that I give half-a-shit about (most times) and I know that it's more than just "that one song" or even just one great cd.
So take it, and like it: (Listed by "importance"...?)
Stabbing Westward
Alice In Chains
Nine Inch Nails
Fuel
Sinatra (Dean, Tony, and The Bing get a nod, too)
A Perfect Circle
Acid Bath
Jack Johnson
Dido
White Zombie
The Doors
and lastly acquiring a taste for Tori Amos

Movies:

Aside from the same exact list that everyone else always has
(Clerks & Chasing Amy
Fight Club & Office Space
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
Amelie
Eternal Sunshine
Waking Life
and The Crow)
...and I finally saw Shaun of the Dead and... I love it!
the following, though are a few that I would like to think aren't on EVERYONE ELSE's, some I know are downright DESPISED including, but not limited to:
12 Monkeys
The Returner
Constantine
Cruel Intentions
The Devil's Rejects
Serendipity
The Replacement Killers
Blade (only the first one was any good at all)
Terminator & Terminator 2 (the third one was utter crap)
...I'll drop the cliche of "I'm sure there's more but I just can't think of them.." so I can be part of the crowd.
Besides, who cares about thinking in a slightly-different, possibly-offensive way, when you can just be a miserable, insecure, defensive sheep, right? Bahhh.

Television:

Well, for starters, I own every season of Buffy:tvs and all but the last season of Angel via the mass-marketing evil/genius of "TV on DVD" if that's too much 'geek' for you, then back-away now, slowly.
On the same note, if every season of Six Feet Under didn't sell for more than the cost of my groceries for a month, I'd probably have them, too.
Since I've recently acquired friends with Cable On Demand I'm now a pseudo-regular fan of The Venture Bros (as opposed to an 'irregular fan' I'm guessing).
I'm not ashamed to admit--although perhaps I should be--that occasionally I'll catch an episode of Smallville
And then there's the only show I really and truly try to keep up on but tend to fail miserably: Supernatural .

Books:

Lately you'll catch me elbow-deep, slogging through another one of Laurell K. Hamilton's Anita Blake: Vampire Executioner novels that went from an "NC-17 Buffy" series to, more and more, supernatural harlequins.
Palahniuk hasn't let me down yet (although there's still plenty of room to).
Also there's a small stock room-sized collection somewhere around here of Richard Laymon 's uber-cheesy horrors

Heroes:

(Damnit. It all gots' erased. Fan-fuckin'-tastic. Did I mention just how much I hate stylesheets? Okay then. Someday I'll actually get around to fixing this, too. Just not today.)

My Blog

A New Meaning to "Mood Music"?

Alright, so by now everyone's grasped the concept:I'm obsessed with the idea of a Zombie Apocalypse! Yes, yes, I know, it's the ultimate D&D-type of geek's kind of fantasy. Hell, I almos...
Posted by Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind). on Fri, 06 Oct 2006 03:12:00 PST

NIN fanboys & fangirls... Lament!

Alright, this just happens to be so pathetic and possibly informative that I figured I had to share.A while ago the NIN site sent out an email saying how Rob Sheridan (the guy in charge of... art dire...
Posted by Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind). on Thu, 15 Jun 2006 11:31:00 PST

More fun than "Guess Who?"... maybe.

Okay kids, so here we go again, posting a new blog--something I haven't done in quite a while. (Run-on sentences are norm, so that's nothing out of the ordinairy here.)The catch with this one tho...
Posted by Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind). on Tue, 30 May 2006 12:44:00 PST

Damn Taggers.

Following suit:I've been tagged by some Nikki girl (who later has been nagging the hell out of me to put this up finally), so here goes....Allow myself to introduce... 6 Random Things about....
Posted by Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind). on Thu, 06 Apr 2006 01:24:00 PST

In passing...

"Those shoes are ugly! Who raised you!?""Well, I thought for where you were going...""You thought I needed ugly shoes for where I'm going??"-an adult daughter shoe hunting with her Mother.(The "W...
Posted by Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind). on Tue, 21 Feb 2006 12:41:00 PST

"Global Personality Test" ..whatever.

Okay, so this was on Sheila's profile and I've taken it a few times before and, depending on how honest you are with the answers (ie you might have to really actually think about it before you go ahea...
Posted by Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind). on Sun, 15 Jan 2006 09:21:00 PST

Dear god, it's another one: The Bed Warmer App

The Spooning/Bed Warmer/Cuddle Call Application [Now with a Pre-formatted Answer Space for Her Pleasure!] 1.)Are you affectionate and enjoy being mildly-smothered in a secure-esque embrace during sle...
Posted by Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind). on Mon, 09 Jan 2006 10:21:00 PST

Ye Ol' "Music = You" Bulletin

Okay, by now this bulletin has probably circled the MySpace Boards about four-thousand times, roundtrip, but I'm bored and this gave me something to keep my mind occupied for.. well, not long enough r...
Posted by Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind). on Sat, 10 Dec 2005 10:31:00 PST

A bunch of people and a lot of pageviews

Well, I just did this as a farce at the depths of my anti-socialness here on MySpace, a community site, but I figured I'd share with all my not-so-avid readers here (it's basically word-for-word from ...
Posted by Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind). on Mon, 07 Nov 2005 08:38:00 PST

The Hiatus is upon...well, us.

Alright, so here's your warning--wait, or is that supposed to be "your sign", either way--if you managed to miss it somehow or other in my journal (or you're just a nosy fucker and enjoy snooping thro...
Posted by Matthew (just Matthew, if you don't mind). on Sat, 01 Oct 2005 10:02:00 PST