Rev. Steven Stepe

I am Sam. Sam I am. I am energy. I can neither be created nor destroyed. I am the Walrus. I am he as you are we and we are all together. I am an ordained minister. I am a practicing Shaman. I dress to the left. I am socially retarded. I am somebody's father, son, friend, and husband. I am an addict. I am a goof. I am late for a very important date. I am the anti-Bush. I am greedy. I am self-centered. I am green with envy. I am Iron Man. I've been in jail twice. I've had a near death experience. I drink a 2-liter of Mountain Dew and a can of Pepsi while at work. I prefer Pepsi. Jagermeister is my favorite alcohol although I don't drink much. I have a 33 inch waist. I wear size 10 shoes. I love Chinese buffets. I drive a maroon '97 Ford Taurus. I put on 150, 50 pound oil coolers for semis in a 10 hour work day. I have an upper retainer with five fake teeth. I shave once a week. I believe in God. I still don't have grey hair. I get mistaken for 30 years old. I love my wife after 14 years. I use shampoo as soap when I shower. I sit Native American style when I type at the computer. I wear boxer briefs. I really like Christina Aguilara's "Back to Basics" album. I sleep on the right side of the bed. I only have 3 or four CDs. My house is a beige ranch style home. I only wear white socks. I am losing my hair. I have three tattoos and I am going to get a fourth. I like to rough it when I camp. I have tried dog food. I'm a joker. I'm a smoker. I'm a midnight toker. I have been so poor I ate one day and my dog ate the next. I coined the phrase, "Mean People Suck". I like my steaks medium rare. I love all seafood. I don't have a cellphone. I believe the war was wrong. I don't like donuts with filling. I prefer French donuts. I don't like butter on my pancakes. The best purchase I made was a Sony Walkman mp3 player. I have over 3000 songs on my computer. I would love to be in a band again. I have an over active imagination. I did not go to my senior prom. I had a cool tree house growing up. My first car was a silver Vega. I was given an award for Strangest Imagination in second grade. I was beat up daily in grade school. I prefer early Fall. When I moved back to Peoria from Atlanta I was so broke that I had to sell my phone for $10 worth of gas to a gas station attendent to make it back. My ears stick out but not as much as they used to. I learned to walk at nine months. I will be eligible for AARP in six years. I can't type worth a damn. I rode my bike 150 miles in 2 days. I have a 90 pound Olde English Sheepdog. I lived near Chicago, Atlanta, and southern Illinois as well as Peoria. I have been to over 40 states plus El Salvador, Jamaica, the Cayman Islands and Mexico. I would move to Amsterdam or an island if I had the gumption. I have a 401K. My house has an unattached garage, three bedrooms and a finished basement. I feel off a slide head first when I was 8. I had a hernia operation when I was 4. I had my toncels out when I was 14. I believe in many conspiracy theories. My kids have a hamster and two gold fish. There is so much stuff in my garage I can't get my car in. I'm starting to have a thing for +40 women. I love soft pretzels. My left ear is pierced three times and I don't wear an earring. My finger nails are usually unkempt. I was almost run over by Eddie Vedder in Las Vegas. I love slot machines. I used to have a dog poop scooping business called, "Dog Gone It". I started working for a paycheck at age 12. I got to cut my daughter's umbilical cord. I wear Euphoria colgne. I've written about 150 songs. I had a song recorded by someone in Nashivlle. I'm afraid of heights. I am right handed. I got drunk for the first time at age 12. I smoked pot when I was 14. I have fluent knowledge of psychoactive plants. I never harmed an animal, except for recently putting a 15 year old dog to sleep. I am not a good driver. I've been in the White House. President Bush visited my place of employment recently. I get the willies walking alone at night. I have a Bachelor's degree in social work and an Associate's degree in psychology. I swear alot when in places I can. I am pro-abortion in certain situations. I am for an overthrow of the current governmental system. I was once attacked by a goose that bit me on the thigh. I seldom laugh outloud for some reason, but I have a very good sense of humor. I don't care for sports except for skateboarding and snowboarding. I want to parasail. My dad might be part Viking. My middle name is Visvaldis which means, "Ruler of everything." I believe life is comprised of finite patterns that can be learned and once learned, wisdom can beobtained. I believe UFO's might exist. My favorite cereal is Fruit Loops. I have ugly feet. I once got kicked in the leg by a horse. I weighed 45 pounds in first grade. I am usually in a great mood. I use a #4 clipper for haircuts. I am the most confident I have ever been. I have a tremor in my left hand. I wear 2x shirts. I have very vivid dreams. A movie about my life would be an interesting one. I like to cook. I know sign language and Spanish. I used to play the trumpet in high school. I am guilty by association. I have not hit anyone in anger since third grade. I am a doormat. I dream every night that I can fly by flapping my arms. I avoid pork products. My hands are beginning to look old. I have real good skin. I feel like I was an artist of some sort in the 1940's in a previous life. I am a frustrated artist. I had a cool beer can and stamp collection as a child. I used to skateboard. I am not a good swimmer. I don't like cold water. I am afraid to swim in a lake because of fish. I have to concentrate when I walk. ..