Geoffrey profile picture

Geoffrey

George is a big pink cunt

About Me

Hello. You may remember me as the star of kids show Rainbow. I know, I was fucking ace.Since MY programme finished I've spent my time cultivating all sorts of exotic plants which help to keep me in the life of luxury that I've been accustomed to. I also have a little side line as a pimp. The idea came to me after realising that Bungle and Jane were fucking useless and that without the show they'd struggle to survive. So out of the kindness of my heart, I decided to whore them out.Jane's a renowned slag and was virtually giving it away to anyone that would take her so I've put her skills to good use. Plus, seeing as she's now addicted to crack, I hardly have to give her fuck all. Just enough for her next rock. As for Bungle, well everyone knows just what a retarded cuntbag he is, so I don't have to give him anything, apart from letting him have free board in my shed. Which is handy for me as it means that I can give him a good slap whenever the need arises.Now if there's anything else you'd like to know just ask. Except for 'Is it the real Geoffrey?' I feel that if you need to ask that question after just reading all the shit above then you are a fucking idiot.Oh, and by the way, don't request my friendship if you have no intention of communicating in one way or another as in my opinion this makes you a cunt.Now come on, entertain me you twats.
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My Interests


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I'd like to meet:

My beautiful and glamourous agent Rachel because although she promises the earth, I very rarely seem to get any decent job offers. You'd think she'd at least offer to sleep with a few producers to develop my career. After all, it isn't as though she's averse to picking up any Tom, DICK or Harry outside her local Co op.
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Music:


TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Geoffrey
Birthday: 30th February
Birthplace: In a stable just off the M25
Current Location: Baghdad (Have just witnessed Saddam dangling)
Eye Color: Mauve with a touch of orange
Hair Color: Same as above
Height: 6ft 18
Right Handed or Left Handed: Depends what mood I'm in
Your Heritage: Aborigine crossed with a dolphin
The Shoes You Wore Today: Yellow wellingtons
Your Weakness: Ladies
Your Fears: Big hairy men
Your Perfect Pizza: Goat, hedgehog and rabbit shit
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: To be a complete and utter cunt
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Cunt
Thoughts First Waking Up: Same as above
Your Best Physical Feature: Can't name just one for fucks sake. Have you seen me?
Your Bedtime: Whenever the fuck I like.
Your Most Missed Memory: Twatting Bungle
Pepsi or Coke: Coke (sniff)
MacDonalds or Burger King: Maccys
Single or Group Dates: Single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Would rather drink my own urine
Chocolate or Vanilla: Not fussed
Cappuccino or Coffee: Cappucino
Do you Smoke: Yes I do. Got a problem with that you health facist?
Do you Swear: What cunt thought up these questions?
Do you Sing: Naturally. I'm multi talented
Do you Shower Daily: Yes, I'm not a smelly fuckrag
Have you Been in Love: Don't have time for it.
Do you want to go to College: Do I fuck
Do you want to get Married: Never again.
Do you belive in yourself: I'm a fucking superstar. Of course I do.
Do you get Motion Sickness: No I don't
Do you think you are Attractive: Who doesn't?
Are you a Health Freak: Am I fuck
Do you get along with your Parents: Fine, now they're dead
Do you like Thunderstorms: Yes, as my parents were killed in one whilst enjoying a round of golf
Do you play an Instrument: I've been known to bang out a good tune on my pink oboe
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Of course
In the past month have you Smoked: Yes
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Yes
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Yes
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: I open them all of the time
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: As I'm not a fucking yank, no I haven't
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: I'd rather eat 7 week old horse shit from a plate of broken glass
In the past month have you been on Stage: Of course I fucking have
In the past month have you been Dumped: Ha ha ha. Are you fucking kidding
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Of course not. It's fucking freezing
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No comment
Ever been Drunk: On occasion
Ever been called a Tease: All of the time
Ever been Beaten up: Hard as fucking nails me
Ever Shoplifted: No comment
How do you want to Die: On the job
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: An animal beautician
What country would you most like to Visit: Colombia
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Brown
Favourite Hair Color: Dark
Short or Long Hair: Long
Height: Short but not a midget
Weight: As long as they're not fat and sweaty I don't care
Best Clothing Style: Naked
Number of Drugs I have taken: 54.3
Number of CDs I own: 10562
Number of Piercings: 60
Number of Tattoos: One big fucker
Number of things in my Past I Regret: Fuck all

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