hello failure© profile picture

hello failure©

I am here for Friends

About Me



im jessica.
you can call me jessi.
or jess.
or anything you want.
i really dont care.
just dont call me thin
or beautiful
or pretty.
because im not any of those things.
i'm really really not.
i want to be.
i try to be.
but i'm not and i never will be.
i change my hair.
i change my clothes.
i even change my name.
but unfortunately, i'm still me.
and i hate it.
i've hated it for 5 years now.
this is not my real myspace.
by real i mean the one everyone that knows me, sees.
this is the real me, however.
these are my real thoughts.
my real ideas.
my real feelings.

and i hate them & love all at the same time.

My Interests

I really
Like
thin-ness
writting
blood
polka dots
my real friends
stephen
cutting
music
poetry
water
sit ups
jump roping
sex
running
dancing
hot showers
sharp objects
drinking
passing out
feeling dizzy
photography
thin-ness
sleep
cold
negative calorie foods
my shades
my propolene
my razors
my journal
my cat
eye liner
hair clips
bright colors on nails
thin-ness


I really
Dislike
fat
food
lazy-ness
chocolate
air planes
waiting
headaches
fighting
people who dont understand

I'd like to meet:



Music:

i just like music.

Heroes:

all my friends. they know who they are. ♥

My Blog

new poem

I Gave Away My OreosSlouching in a desk centered in a bright roomFull of life and laughterI hear nothing, see nothingI sense things moving but the world's on muteThe screen went blackMy fingers orange...
Posted by hello failure© on Thu, 29 Mar 2007 09:31:00 PST

new poem. written by, me.

Shoe Lace Braclets Hide The Scarshead tilted to the righteyes wide openyou would never guesswhat she is hopingwind blows her hair to one sideperfect curls that she hateslook out over the line seperati...
Posted by hello failure© on Sat, 07 Oct 2006 09:11:00 PST

story of my fat life [in pictures]

me in the beginning of 6th grade. .blurry i know [what a FATTY]middle of 6th...SO FAT7th...FATTER8th, volleyball[fatterrr]. i dont have any of my soccer pics on my computer yet but i played for 8 year...
Posted by hello failure© on Fri, 17 Mar 2006 05:07:00 PST

new poem

YOU WONT ESCAPE [:   Look at your self. It's disgusting and yellow. it's pink it's white it's purple you dont know what it is it's anything and everything it's nothing. you're nothing But im tryi...
Posted by hello failure© on Sat, 11 Mar 2006 08:33:00 PST

FAST

50 cal limit. starts tomorrow. try and do SOMETHING everyday even if its going for a walk. drink lots of water. dont enter the kitchen. 3-6-06 to 3-10-06   ...
Posted by hello failure© on Mon, 06 Mar 2006 07:18:00 PST

another poem. inspired by a friend.

FIGHT WITH Him         &nb sp;     (not my bf)Its 4 amI haven't sleptThe mirror infront of meDoesn't lieALL of you have eyesAnd a fuckin...
Posted by hello failure© on Sun, 05 Mar 2006 10:15:00 PST

my attempt of a poem [inspired by Callie]

Another BreakdownThe room is darkThe air is staleMy hands shakeMy face is paleThe blade is keenAgainst my thighThe blood appearsI've spelt 'goodbye'My head hangs lowMy eyelids closeA worthless tearDri...
Posted by hello failure© on Sat, 04 Mar 2006 07:30:00 PST

this is definately me

You walk through the grocery store for an hour or more, examining each and every nutritional label. You haven't eaten all day and for once you feel like have a 'real' ED. You go home elated that all ...
Posted by hello failure© on Fri, 03 Mar 2006 09:29:00 PST

6 day fast 2/26-3/2

okay so i ate today about 800 cals. NO more of that nonsense. im going on a fast. Wanna join? :] okay. So 6 days. we can do it! 300 daily cal limit. daily work out: run for 20 minutes 200 sit ups 30 p...
Posted by hello failure© on Sun, 26 Feb 2006 09:34:00 PST

i ate :/

today i ate. and ate and ate. but it was kinda healthy at least. oh gawd FUCKING SHIT. i hate thiissss i hate fooodddd        i love skinny......
Posted by hello failure© on Thu, 23 Feb 2006 10:48:00 PST