[Darling Baby]

Martha. intoxication, infatuation, temptation and knowledge!
I'd quite like to begin all over again. It's minging how everything can change in one night. im never good enough, but i always keep trying.I dont understand myself so i dont expect anybody else to. I'm on the brink of ruining my life, but until everything falls apart, i wont do anything to make things better. I love trying to explain how i feel, or the way i think, because i never make any sense. As soon as i put my trust in someone and open my mouth, things seem to change and things go wrong. Theres only two people i've ever trusted fully, them being steven&nikolai and although i dont really see them much, i'd be nothing if i didnt have them...they are the only people who've ever understood me. I try my best to make other people happy...i like being nicey. I don't hold grudges any longer. If i dislike you, it's most likely because your self centered, if i dont make an effort to speak to you its because im shy, or because your conversation bores me. Non musical people who try to play instruments wind me up. I'd much rather sit in with the lads, get mortal and have a jam than do anything else. Music is my life, and probably will be my main focus for a very long time. Don't think i'm ignorant, i'm just shy and probably one of the most nervous people you'll meet. I'm trying to make the most of this situation, and i'm doing okaay....i'm an optimistic person. inabit!