I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally I tread water for three days in a row.I cook Rachel Ray's Thirty Minute Meals in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love and and outlaw in Peru.Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fans in international botony circles. Children trust me.I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. The laws of physics do not apply to me.I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic and my bills are all paid. On Weekends, to relax, I participate in full-contact origami. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prizewinning clams. I have played Lady MacBeth, I have performed open-heart surgery and I have spoken to Elvis. I don't drink coffee.
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In a Past Life...
You Were: A Friendly Viking.
Where You Lived: Cyprus.
How You Died: Buried alive.
Who Were You In a Past Life?
