rude as jude

one time i dated a retarded girl on accident. one time this deaf chick wouldn't stop calling me. one time i fell for a stripper. my grandma says i'll marry at 30. looks like i blew it. i have commitment issues. i have intimacy issue. i like hugh grant movies. except that last one. hippies piss me off, but i try to be patient with them. my family's a bunch of tree huggers. As a child we lived on a commune briefly but were asked to leave, my pop, he was a bit violent. my ma just moved back to one... go ma!!! i was raised on most the shit these hip kids are claiming now. catch up. two things i hate, taxes and checking my voice mail. i'm an acid reflux survivor. i'm kind of bitter but fuck it.....i just said but fuck, ha. i got a job. i got benefets. i got business cards. you want one? I ran out... i'm a hustler homie. ask about me. google me. there was a time in my life when i was the white guy with dreads who now annoys me to no end. i probably won't read your profile, Here's a secret, nobody does. they just look for names to drop and drop them. i pay attention to zodiac signs. i don't fuck with capicorns. or aquarius chicks for that matter. and let's just say my venus is in my tenth house, if ya catch my drift. i like the word twilight but seldom use it. i'm a vegeterian, but i don't give a shit about animals one way or the other. i think the peta people are a bunch of dumb asses. ask me why i'll tell you why....."why jude?" because. nuff said. I notice alot of kids on here are fond of photoshop, that's cool, whatever, false advertisement. I'm secretly jealous of jewish people because god chose them and not me, bastards. Canada banned me from their country. no to - long distance relationships. yes to - ripe avocados and the first day of spring. i read books. i play cards. i do crosswords at times. i like board games. i love backgammon, the game's like life you can do everything right and still lose in the end. beautiful. i had a dictionary but i lost it. i'm good at arguing but i don't like to do it. in nyc i took the e train home. now i shoot up highland and take short cuts. i can roll anywhere and chill.....ANYWHERE style, you hear me? more places than you. my cruisability factor is high. i'm cereal. i'm a gentleman. i love my mom. my little sister's the shit. my big sis kicks ass. i went to a goth bar last year. i wore turquois there. i smoked cloves. i got love. ministry for life! everyday is halloween. i've been described as a dark horse. you ain't never gonna meet a cat more honest than me. i'm trying to curb that shit. cats say i'm real. being real's over rated. wearing the right clothes to the right bar, now that's a talent... my friends like me alot. at times i'm very witty, other times i suck. i've been called a smart ass. it works well in person not so good in letters. i was born in pontiac michigan. if i don't go back to michigan every few months i get depressed. i left new york, it's cool i guess, it's like a big shopping mall, i heard it was better in the 80's. i wrote most this shit two years ago a lot has changed since then but not enough to re-do my whole page over. i'm more tired than sad. i have hope in my heart. my look for this summer is "urban wasp". i hope it works out. i send my laundry out to get done. they keep shrinkin' my shit. bastards. i take pride in my work, but it doesn't define me.here's some shit me and my man nathan did. he shot that shit.