King of shoes! profile picture

King of shoes!

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

So, you wanna know about me huh. Well, aren't we a little demanding today. Well, i'll start off by saying that my nickname is Crazy John. I don't know how this nickname came to be but it would explain my Bunny suit.( Easter is comming soon.) Many people know me but don't know me or they have forgotten about me. I don't blame them, I blame the JEWS!! I attended highschool for about a year, well... more like 3-6 months total anyway... who keeps count? ( THE JEWS DO!!!!) anywho i just stopped going... and my social life came to a screeching halt.( Just like Pauley Shore's career!) I dropped out of sight from the world. And i got sorta bored and now i'm trying to get back in touch with my friends that i knew. People remember me for humping the waterfountain... humping the vending machine... humping the chairs while the teacher is giving her learning lesson. ( I'm seeing a pattern here) and also for sticking a pencil up a dead frogs ass and telling people at lunch to worship it as their new god and repent for their sins of wearing pants. (thiers? there's? theirs?) I'm also known for tricking the english teacher. " I before E except after C... How do you spell SCIENCE?"AHHH. So many fond memories. So, on to more pressing matters like my intrest or personality.... well you could pretty much derive that I probably have ADD (OHHHH LOOK AT THE KITTY!!!!) or something similar. I do bore easily and i will try to find ways to "entertain" myself. And I am pretty unpredictable. ( :Grabs the kitty and snaps its neck:) As for my intrestest.............um.... I like to go to lazer quest?... I like to go clubbin' (baby seals) and I LOVE BURRITTOS. Oh i also hear voices too, it wasn't really a problem until they started speaking spanish. It's a total of three voices. The one with the raspy voice is called Dirty Sanchez. The one with a sqeeaky voice is called El Libro Con Guacomoles. (He's a scottish noble.) and the one with a deep voice is called Anne Hache. Also I have been trying out diffrent religions for a while. As of this moment my current religion is Norse... it's what the Vikings believe in. I am still a novice in my Viking hood but soon I will be a full fledge Viking or Berserker. (I become a berserker depending on my constitution points and agility. And even then i have to roll a 4d2) All I need now to be a Viking is to kill a bull, a couple of wolves, and a bear. I have to make a cup out of the bulls horn, Clothes out of the wolfs skin, and either a coat or a poncho out of the bear's fur. After that I can join my fellow Vikings in our Hunts. We basicly pillage a village every second Thursday of the new month... well... there aren't many villages in San Antonio so we make do with the Village Markets. If it has Village in it's name, then you can bet your sweet ass were pillaging it!!

My Interests


See me morph into Oded Fehr

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Create your own Celebrity Morphâ„¢ on MyHeritage.com um.... well, i'm a guy in a Bunny suit so..... porn, yeah, that about covers it. Oh and burritos. God i love burritos. Maybe another costume, this one is all grungy. I have a Gorrilla suit, but it's hot as hell. I tried watching king kong in that suit. man, toughest thing ever. Mmmmmm, what else. Pretty much anything intresting or queer.(Odd) Oh yeah anime. love anime, and video games. I also have an intrest in mythological animals and such. Also I have a passion for hamburgers. Pimped By PhatPimpClothing.com

I'd like to meet:

Women (who doesn't? well... except fags.) and wierd exotic farm animals like a moose or a llama. maybe Rubber Johhny... that guy knows how to party. .. um... let's see who else. Bruce Lee. I want to meet this guy because everyone says he's such a badass. Fuck that! He's weak!! I'm calling you out Bruce Lee!! Gonna wup me some chink ass! I'll kick your ass twice as hard as I normaly would because "apparently" you beat Chuck Norris in a series of fights. Nobody Fucks With Chuck! You going down Lee! Your going down! I'm serious Lee! Lets do this! Message me if you have the testicular fortitude to challenge me, bring it!! I would also like to meet Yoko Kanno... one of my gods. This goddess has redeemed the name Yoko. (Yoko Onno...) She is a Genious when it comes to music, she is on par or greater than mozart and bethoven. AND... AND I WOULD LIKE TO MEET MICHAEL McCONNOHIE AGAIN... HE ROCKS!!! For those of you who don't know this who this great man is he is THE LEFT HAND OF VAMPIRE HUNTER D... That should explain all.

Music:

I listen to all kinds. And if you have a problem with that... i'll cut you Well... for the people that loved mini Jackson... too bad! I bring you the blind guitarist! If only he chose a sword instead of a guitar... I would have gladly fought him. Taking the blind guitarist out for a while to put up some Good clean fun!

Movies:

Movies... well mystery science theatre rocks! so does Anchorman! Waiting rocked hard! And let's see... Ong-Bak one and two... long live Tony Jaa!

Television:

Boondocks. i love it cause my role model is in there. Rufus. A black man prejiduce against black people. "Don't trust them NIGGA'S over there! With there big ass nostrils sucking up all the air!" god i love that Nigger!!!!Here is a list of my favorite Anime Full metal panic Fumoffu Neon Genesis Evangelion Ai Yori Aoshi/Enishi Love Hina 3x3 eyes Bleach Naruto/ get rid of the filler episodes and move to 3 years from then!! Gundam Wing/Seed Hellsing Excel Saga Puni Puni Poemi Cromartie High/ Freddie Mercury Kicks Ass! 7 Samurai/ I Love RIIIIIICCCCEEE!!!! Card Captor Sakura/ DON'T JUDGE ME!!! Trigun Bakuretsu Tenshi/ only because of the ending and the unnecessary cleavage Full Metal Alchemist/ i have the strong arm alchemist's glove!!! Ah! My Goddess Ghost In The Shell Stand Alone Complex Mai Hime/ The person who made this is a sick bastard... but i like it!!! Dot Hack SignI have others but for some reason they seem to elude me from the current moment... FUMOFFU! Ah, I just remembered another great anime. I know a lot of people are gonna laugh and call me gay but let me assure you... I can and will beat the living shit out of you, I will track you down, beat you with my fist... that's all I need. And force you to watch every episode of this awesome anime. SAILOR MOON. Yes, I said it. I watched and loved Sailor Moon. Although I did find Sailor Moon R a little repetitive but Sailor Moon S came and things got intresting once again. I have seen all of the Sailor Moon Animes (Sailor Moon, Sailor Moon R, Sailor Moon S, Sailor Moon Super S, and Sailor Moon Stars. Stars did not air here and the only reason for that is because well, you have to see it.) I have only watched up to episode 13 of the live action. I love it, My god... Mercury is so hot... Keep in mind though, I can beat you with a Mackeral fish. Also a good anime is Tekkaman Blade. Also known as Techno Man in the states.

Books:

Jugs and Man Elves off the Shelves... I like the articles...

Heroes:

CHUCK NORRIS hands down. Let me enlighten you with some of the things this man has done. 1. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month. 2. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. 3.Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs. 4. Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement. 5. Chuck Norris doesn't have to do anything for a Klondike bar. 6.Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him. 7. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there. 8. Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one. 9. To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and aquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong. 10. When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side. 11. Before he forgot a gift for Chuck Norris, Santa Claus was real. 12. Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress. 13. Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away. 14. Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian. 15. After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. His reasoning? It was more "humane". 16. One time in an airport a guy accidently called Chuck Norris "Chick Norris". He explained it was an honest mistake and apologized profusely. Chuck accepted his apology and politley signed an autograph. Nine months later, the guy's wife gave birth to a bearded baby. The guy knew exactly what had happened, and blames nobody but himself. 17. Chuck Norris was going to spend a relaxing day watching television when one of those commercials for Trix cereal came on. Angered by what he saw, Chuck Norris spent the rest of his, what was supposed to be a relaxing day, punching every child he came across. He would then shout at them, “Trix are for Chuck Norris.” 18. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants. 19. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody. 20. Did you know that Chuck Norris was the fourth wiseman. He gave Jesus the gift of beard a gift that Jesus wore proudly till his dying days. The other wisemen jealuos of Chuck Norris's gift used their influence to get him omitted from the bible. All three soon died from roundhouse kick related deaths.

My Blog

I moved ladies!

Yup! I moved, it was a long and crazy task but after 3 lemonades and a mexican I managed to move all of my belongings from the living room to the back room. LAWL! All of you thought I was moving out o...
Posted by King of shoes! on Mon, 04 Dec 2006 03:29:00 PST

What Russians like to do

Why, your average Ruskie enjoys all sorts of varied leisure activities. For example, waiting in line for bread, or selling nuclear arms to terrorists in exchange for bread, or freezing to death in the...
Posted by King of shoes! on Wed, 15 Mar 2006 01:52:00 PST

Pranks!

I went down to the docks and contracted AIDS from two Dominican sailors (the hard way) and went to the mall. I then slit my wrist and started spraying little children with my blood. No one knew I had ...
Posted by King of shoes! on Wed, 15 Mar 2006 01:06:00 PST

Another section in random!

World War III May Be Fought On The Moon! We've written before that both the US and China have plans to go to the moon not for exploration, as the US claims, but to mine the incredibly valuable fuel H...
Posted by King of shoes! on Sat, 04 Mar 2006 04:03:00 PST

More Randomness!

Bulbasaur is a strong, managable Pokemon for beginning trainers. No one's sure whether Bulbasaur and its evolutions are plant or animal. They seem to have characteristics of both. A strange bulb was p...
Posted by King of shoes! on Thu, 02 Mar 2006 03:08:00 PST

Random facts!!!

The longest one-syllable word in the English language is "screeched." On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament Building is an American flag. Barbie's measurements if she were...
Posted by King of shoes! on Thu, 02 Mar 2006 02:19:00 PST