Jen Ryan profile picture

Jen Ryan

sweat it outtt

About Me

I know what happens when you cross a cheekbone and a pistol grip, besides hairline fractures. You get ideas, inaccurate ones like "no problem," "the son of a bitch will pay for this," and "the scary part's over." You get a ghost. Not necessarily of the dead variety. The faceless type. I've become the girl no one can every hurry into the men's room with a gun. I don't like it when someone tells me the proof is in the pudding. I've had many a good thing going with just a smile and an inner thigh. The reality is people drape their arms over chairs next to them on any sunny afternoon. They smile at the views. People love having tendons and reaching for their beer and pointing at sailboats and squeezing knees. I love shoulder-tracers. I like metal strings and the sad way the guitar man bends it. Ice melts no matter how much the sculpture was. The boys in the band are still in detox ,their skin so timeless and damp, so raw and in need of bandaging from my constant, constantly forgiving touch. I like to toss my hair last. There must be a trick, a cross between CPR and algebra to give me the perfect number to win that lottery. The roots don't need the ground, just each other. Thats how I feel too. Last night at this strip club a guy leaned over and told me he wanted to eat a bowl full of marashino cherries out of the strippers mouth, so I bought him an Amaretto Sour. I really do like it here. ******************************************************Me and my girls like to drink your reddest wine and steal your flowers from the vase. We prefer the long stems cause they smash better against our asses. I'm done getting caracatures drawn of myself- they always over-emphasize my eyebrows and my bustline. I remain unseduced by food. I planted a kiss on the wall by the landing where the turn in the stairs is called "the coffin corner". I wrote someones name by an oak tree in bright green letters and its still there. I do not like contracts. I do not like the word: verbal garlic. I enjoy a guest bathroom with heart shaped soaps that I'm allowed to use. I like a good reception with free wine and cheese...Hot Premade Layouts - Music Bands - Animals - Movies

My Interests

Reform school girls know which fork to use. Plastic plants are just as important as the ones that require water. I'm not ever telling where I buried that key. Just one glass of red wine before bed. I like it when you run your run-on sentences with just enough punctuation for me to figure it out. I enjoy pumpkin seeds from the vegetable, not the bag at the golden pantry. Circus music after 11pm feels right. The guadalupana rose candle relaxes. I pick my running shoes based on performance and how pretty there are..its a tricky combo. Etch-a-Scetch hurts my wrists. Thicky-thick girls. Lyrical dancing in the living room. Letting the neighbors watch. Bomb shelters should all have keys. Kicking the sand off first. Sconces only belong in IKEA. Dealing the cards face up counts. Vegas showgirls make-up must be tough to get off. Music that brings up the past is nice. Bling on the teeth. Knowing I can do it. Blankets that are big enough to cover up my toes. Little white gloves. The velveteen rabbit was a good lesson. Little pieces of me blowing away when the lottery numbers are called. Paper-shredding the visa bill. Georgia Peaches. Vote. Hair-care product whores. Shiny objects with killer consequences. Smoke your skeezy ass cigarettes in another room. Loving the enemy with all my heart. Using masacara as a wand and a tool. 11 french fries is enough for a side order. Exercising with proper music is a must. Declarative statements. Money orders (save those reciepts, bitches). My girls from the 145 South Poplar. Batteries and Coke-a-Cola do mix. All the Pinot Noir you and your friends have to offer. The Fall of the House of Usher. Running the comb through the conditioner. Fighting for what is Mine. Moving trucks that know the right way. I like it when the mood strikes. I don't wear ballet flats and I never will. Pulling the map out and picking a point. Vaseline is for twister. I miss the dirrrrty south.

I'd like to meet:

puppets without masters

Movies:

The Tender Trap aswell as The Boy Who Believed- starring Kell Dodson and myself (circa 1994)

Books:

Pablo Neruda

My Blog

Bro Ho's

    The girls out here are a bit different from back home. As you can see, I have carefully layed out some criteria for the newest batch of ladies I have run into in the O.C. Please read the...
Posted by Jen Ryan on Tue, 27 Mar 2007 01:09:00 PST

Lucky 7's

  My visa bill is due on the 26th. What about this: i'm so sick of playing the lottery and never scratching off those vertical 7's.  Hell, I'd even take it horizontal tonight.  I'...
Posted by Jen Ryan on Wed, 24 Jan 2007 09:32:00 PST

America's strangest loving couple

Its still winter, and I don't know you anymore. This morning I stood in the kitchen with the illusion, peeling an orange. I'm  late for work, putting mascara on while my knees did the driving. T...
Posted by Jen Ryan on Wed, 03 Jan 2007 08:57:00 PST

Sleep is for babies

Everyone here lies face down, in a line- head to toe. Everyone here needs a secret in the form of a phrase like "Snack Mansion" or "Crepuscular Concupiscence". Everyone here stares into my cupped hand...
Posted by Jen Ryan on Thu, 07 Dec 2006 11:44:00 PST