Garth Dale profile picture

Garth Dale

Jesus said, 'When you strip without being ashamed, and you take your clothes and put them under your

About Me

THIS PROFILE WAS EDITED WITH CARE AND GOOD CONNECTIONS. I'm a Posterboy for the lame. I pretty much spill my coffee every time. I belie myself sometimes by being shy. My car has wheels. I don't respect people who are fake all the time. I have a dream of becoming a mullet shampooer. I didn't wax the flag poll 'till I was a sophomore in College. I'm addicted to tuna wraps from Subway, I can stop anytime I want so back off Julie Dick. I have the smallest bladder known to man. Bad for road trips, but good for my kidneys. I like making people smile when they've had a bad day. I smell my shirts to decide if they need washed. There is a little known fact about me that I once made all the rice. I regretfully admit this is true. Once I got a whole bag of rice and screwed it up so many times I had to use the whole bag. Ladies don't judge me. I can change, I got a rice maker now.

My Interests

Learning my shapes and colors. ..

I'd like to meet:

Someone at FBCU Bank where we meet accidentally. We'll start to talk when she borrows my pen, and when I go up to heaven, Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

Music:

Anything but Sean Paul. I like: Green Day, Rage Against the Machine, Metallica, U2, Live, The Mars Volta, Abhishek Sharma Nepali Trio, Coheed and Cambria, Atari Teenage Riot, The Prayer Chain, Portugal. The Man, L7, KMFDM, Danielson, Fugazi, Primus, Unashamed, Kingston Falls, Santana, Gipsy Kings, Mana, laley, Joy Eletric, David Byrne, Public Enemy, Beastie Boys, Fugees.

Movies:

Anything but Crossroads with Britney Spears. The Big Lebowski is my #1 favorite. Pi(faith in chaos): Darren Aronofsky, Usual Suspects, Welcome to the Dollhouse, F911, Lola Rent, Adaptation, anything BALIWOOD esp. Hawa Mein Udti Jaaye...and Jawla IV. American Splender. Boondock Saints, All the Christopher Guest movies, A Clockwork Orange, The Edukators, ME AND YOU AND EVERYONE WE KNOW, The Boy Who Copied, Josie and the Pussycats. A lot of indie movies, foreign and domestic. Old movies too.

Television:

700 Club (for a good laugh), Fox News (for some good graphics), CNN (for some slanted news), The Daily Show (for some empirical data driven facts).

Books:

Good Books: 1984, Animal Farm (watch out Farmers of America), Till We Have Faces, Old Man and the Sea, Da Vinci Code, Angles and Demons, AMERICA: By John Stewart, A People's History: By Howard Zinn, Slaughterhouse V: The Children's Crusade, Of Mice and Grapes of Wrath: By John Steinbeck, A Clockwork Nothing Like the Sun: By Anthony Burgess, The War of Art: Steven Pressfield, The Art of War: Sun Tzu (Thomas Cleary translation), Running with Scissors: Augusten Burroughs (Seen the movie, have the book, still haven't read it yet), The Pilgrim's Regress: C.S. LewisMy favorite authors are: George Orwell, John Steinbeck (only after I've had plenty of coffee to keep awake), Hemingway, J.D. Salinger, Thomas Merton, Burroughs, C.S. Lewis, Fyodor Dostoevsky. I also like to read instruction manuals for electronic appliances and maps with roads that show me how to get places. Sometimes when I'm lost, I stop at random houses where old ladies live and ask for directions to the nearest gas station.

Heroes:

My Cuisinart Brew Central. Abhishek "krazie tori" Sharma

!This is Timmy the turtle with tourettes (307.23 DSM-IV-TR). If you click on his shell when his head is inside he'll get psychomotor tics. This is embarrassing so don't bother him too much. If you have time click on, "more" for worms and feed him one or two. He loves them plus they contain 45mg of Remeron to help him relax.

My Blog

I am in a Hospital Bed

You've been rushed God Said  You'll live today in a Hospital Bed You've collided with Life By Freedom pronounced Dead So the Mind can fly, unheld by the Strife Heaven is your Room Prot...
Posted by Garth Dale on Fri, 16 Feb 2007 11:21:00 PST

How a GI Joe Can Make Us Safer.

A few weeks ago I ran across an article by the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration asserting that two out of every three motorists are involved in an accident that injures someone in the ve...
Posted by Garth Dale on Thu, 21 Sep 2006 07:54:00 PST

The Poverty Gap Between Me and the Rich Continues to Grow Even Wider.

A recent report from the Michiana Bayer Federal Credit Union confirmed today that the poverty gap between me and the rich has widely increased in the last year. The report assesses that despite politi...
Posted by Garth Dale on Thu, 17 Aug 2006 07:02:00 PST

Rob the hardware store and tell 'em make me a grill

Most who know me know that I love to flex my grill.  I love all kindez of grillz.  I got me a platnum propane grill fo' right now.  In three payments I'll have a gold charcoal...
Posted by Garth Dale on Tue, 11 Jul 2006 06:58:00 PST

I miss Tom.

Dear Tom, I deleted you from my friends 'cause I thought you were some killer trying to lick my toes.  Now that I see you are a nice person and just want to be my friend, I want you back on my fr...
Posted by Garth Dale on Sun, 28 May 2006 05:20:00 PST