I'm a sidewinding, free floating, slap happy, flim flam, with a chip on my shoulder and a delicious spinach dip on the other. I'm a straight talker, a crooked thinker, and a kindred spirit. I don't belong to any clubs, guilds, sewing circles, book clubs, or family councils.
I don't send many greeting cards, I think pharmaceutical companies are one of the greatest evils on earth, and I don't believe you can change a world from behind a computer. I fear and marvel at the youth, try to listen carefully to the elderly, and desperately want to tell at least one person in every room to shut the fuck up.
I don't think I will ever eat enough cheese, I don't think I will ever stop thinking farts or people falling down are funny, and I think 2 girls and 1 cup is fake. No one shits like that. I hope beyond hope that this next election changes this countries course, and I once just once, I wanna see Rupert Murdoch in Fallujah wearing a "Allah is Gay" tee shirt.
I love my family, my girlfriend, and my apartment. I'm so lucky, and often don't know it. Sometimes I just wanna take care of chimps for a living. (Quick update as of January 5th: I am not as lucky as I thought, but still luckier than others. I no longer want to take care of chimps either. I'd like them to take care of me.)
