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You can lead a horse to water. DUNE can make him drink.DUNE let the dogs out.Every time you masturbate I painted a t-shirt. Not because you masturbated, but because that is how often I paint t-shirts.If DUNE was in a room with Hitler, Stalin, and ,Oprah and he had a gun with 2 bullets, he..d shoot Oprah twice.If you wake up in the morning, it..s because DUNE spared your life.DUNE painted 93 shirts in just 4 days time. Wait, that is a real fact.DUNE once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up the location of the keys.DUNE was never addicted to Vodka. Vodka was addicted to DUNE.If DUNE and MacGyver were locked in a room together, DUNE would make a bomb out of MacGyver and get out.1.6 billion Chinese are angry with DUNE. Sounds like a fair fight.The quickest way to a man..s heart is through DUNE..s gun.DUNE once told God he needed access, the event has since been referred to as "The Big Bang."DUNE..s favorite color is severe terror alert red. His second favorite color is violet, but just because it sounds like violent.DUNE got Hellen Keller to talk.Superman wears DUNE pajamas.When Google can't find something, it asks DUNE for help.DUNE saved Private Ryan.When the boogie man goes to sleep, he checks his closet for DUNE.When you open a can of whoop-*bleep*, DUNE jumps out.Killing DUNE doesn..t make him dead. It just makes him angry.When life gave DUNE lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. DUNE *bleep*ing hates lemonade.DUNE played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.If DUNE says "I just want to talk to him/her" and that him/her is you... well Amigo, you..re *bleep*ed.Before Vodka, DUNE tried becoming addicted to speed...but it only slowed him down.DUNE came up with the idea to can and sell his own urine, that product is known as Red Bull.DUNE just gave blood to the Red Cross after endless bent needles,he asked for a bucket and a shotgun.DUNE said Hurricane Katrina was the best shower he had in years.The last person who looked at DUNE was Ray Charles.DUNE is the reason why Waldo is hiding.You are what you eat. That is why DUNE..S diet consists entirely of bricks, steel, and the tears of small children.DUNE invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.DUNE is hung like a 8 year old. No, seriously... his penis is the size of a small boy.Onions do not make DUNE cry. DUNE makes onions *bleep* themselves.If you rearrange the letters in DUNE it reveals his credo to women: "NUDE".DUNE once walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors. ***UPDATE*** DUNE once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, DUNE lives in the U.S.It takes DUNE 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.DUNE doesn..t throw up if he drinks too much. DUNE throws down!Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime.DUNE calls this "a slow Tuesday.DUNE can divide by zero. DUNE doesn..t shower, he only takes blood baths.DUNE does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.