u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out

About Me

.. RICACHAN PROFILE.... THE PERSON I LOVE,DOESNT LOVE ME...... RICATOKZ is my name.. ^_^ .. Maria, Rica S. Urbina.. .. Born on July 10.. Himitsu =) .. .. Im 1/4 chinese coz my mom is 1/4 chinese.. .. But im a PURE FILIPINO baby.. =b.. .. I wish i could have Blood JAPANESE, ^_^.. .. But,Never mind ;( .. .. and a 100% autisthic(Crazy,buang,bakamitai..)i had my own WORLD.. .. my friends often told me that im a MANHATER..^_^ .. im contented to what i have... .. friendly and simple..comedian,.. .. and im truly, madly crazily in love with BUANG.. .. .. perfect combination DI BA?? hehehe..
How do you cool your lips After a summer's kiss How do you rid the sweat After the body bliss How do you turn your eyes From the romantic glare How do you block the sound of a voice You'd know anywhereOh I really should have known By the time you drove me home By the vagueness in your eyes Your casual good-byes By the chill in your embrace The expression on your face That told me you might have some advice to give On how to be insensitiveHow do you numb your skin After the warmest touch How do you slow your blood After the body rush How do you free your soul After you've found a friend How do you teach your heart it's time To fall in love againOh you probably won't remember me It's probably ancient history I'm one of the chosen few Who went ahead and fell for you I'm out of vogue, I'm out of touch I fell too fast, I feel too much I thought that you might have some advice to give On how to be insensitive

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Sorry guys but someone owns my ♥HEART♥... If only i could LOVE a person that is only my FAMILY and SUGIYAMA .. .. till the last chapter of my life.. and if ever i could lose them, i kept the promise all by myself

i AM i am a daughter,a sister,a grand-daughter a niece,a cousin,a Friend,i am PARTNER, A YOUNG girl and a GROWN woman, I am CONFIDENT and SCARED terrified and EXCITED ..I am LOVING and CARING and THOUGHTFUL and HOPEFUL, I am SICK and TIRED. I am SHY and Friendly.and Careful and Carless. I am BROKEN and Whole... I am MISUNDERSTOOD,MISGUIDE, and MISLEAD, I am hard WORKING and DETERMINED, But little SACRED on the inside, I wish on the stars and DREAM my dreams, I pray to GOD and CRY a TEARS, I SMILE on the Outside while im DYING the inside, I listen to the other who won't LISTEN to me, I walk on the eggshells,and i walk on FIRE.. I believe in PASSION, But not in TrueLove... I LOVE YOU but no one could LOVE you like i do.. I want you but too close. I am EVERYTHING and NOTHING all at once.. And all i want is you to love and accept ♥ME♥

.. MY CONFESSION....... GOD provide me unhappiness .. .. he doesn't love me, does hell .. .. GOD hated me so much, and he just let me suffer for all stupid things.. .. he left me here in his own world to be neglected.. .. I am weak and dont have a confidence .. .. I felt so weird with all his creatueres .. .. And he let me live in his lonely way .. .. I still have TRAUMA ,PAIN and even UNSECURITY .. .. Even in times i almost die in crying.... .. I love exactly,But Pain still REMAIN .. .. I always get fall,But none of people catch me .. .. Im doing my best,while failure comes in.... .. he always takes me to a trouble,and people destroys me.. .. Im scared to fight for another reasons to stay again .. .. Im scared that someone i loved leave me alone again,You know i'll die for it,Even my HEART & SOUL.. .. Why YOu Give My Life so much pain.... .. Im SCARED please dont HURT me again.... .. Im AFRAID to FACE loneliness again.... .. YOu Know im not that strong.... .. I does GIVE UP now if you let the person leave me alone again.... .. I dont wanna CRY anymore.... .. Please....

TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Maria. Rica Salvador Urbina
Birthday: July 10, 1987 oh my God im turning 20...waahh
Birthplace: Manila/
Current Location: Bulacan,But i stay again here in manila for other purposed =) hope i can make it...
Eye Color: kinda blue on the surface.. and blend with black..hahaha
Hair Color: Coffe Brown/black
Height: 5'3 im so small,I like tall people..hihihi
Right Handed or Left Handed: to the right,to the right....haha
Your Heritage: uhm, kind of japanese..but filipino baby
The Shoes You Wore Today: shoeless...hahaha
Your Weakness: uhm, Trauma of people who always turn away and leave me all alone..
Your Fears: To lose my love one..I dont want to happen again anymore..
Your Perfect Pizza: uhm,with bacon and mushroom..
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: to finish my studies,Well soon to be a witch doctor..hahaha But i want to be a designer also
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Gotcha??shit..
Thoughts First Waking Up: anu ba yan?? Oh asawa miss you!!
Your Best Physical Feature: uhm my sexy body..hahaha joke
Your Bedtime: 4 am something like that..
Your Most Missed Memory: uhm, i missed all about sugiyama
Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi..
MacDonalds or Burger King: Burger King.. i like ham with cheese burger..yummy..
Single or Group Dates: Single.. But im looking for double date..but never mind haha
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Nestea..
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate..
Cappuccino or Coffee: cappuccinno...
Do you Smoke: Uhm sometimes when im depressed
Do you Swear: Yeah, But i wanted to remember as people get sincere..
Do you Sing: Yeah..Often times when im happy..but when im sad i cant..
Do you Shower Daily: Of course i am..suck
Have you Been in Love: Yeah.. So deeply In Love
Do you want to go to College: yeah,thats why...
Do you want to get Married: Of course..But never mind.. Nobody wants to marry me..hihihi
Do you belive in yourself: No..sad to say..Becaused im a weak person..
Do you get Motion Sickness: yes,Cry,Cry,cry always attemp suicide.. ^_^
Do you think you are Attractive: Maybe..People can judge me..But i cannot please people
Are you a Health Freak: waaahhh..
Do you get along with your Parents: No.. I dont have father...My mama is also sick
Do you like Thunderstorms: sometimes
Do you play an Instrument: yeah,i play piano before,now little bit of guitar..i wanna play drums too
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: yeah, I think 2 months ago..
In the past month have you Smoked: yeah..so sick and mad at people who destroy my personality..but never mind..
In the past month have you gone on a Date: yeah with sugi
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: No.. No money..waaaahhhh kawawa naman
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: no.. i hate that
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: yeah.. i very like to eat that..dont ya make me hungry...yummy
In the past month have you been on Stage: yes..
In the past month have you been Dumped: Fuck it..
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: no
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: yeah,someone stole my camera my neclace even my ring, But i believe in KARMA..who ever you are..FUCK
Ever been Drunk: kinda..a bit of lasing word..
Ever been called a Tease: yeah..
Ever been Beaten up: yeah..
Ever Shoplifted: No it sucks
How do you want to Die: Yeah always,I attemp suicide 3 times for all of my life,But im still wondering why im still alive.. i
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: I wanna be a successful business woman in the earth,but never mind..I dont have business..hihihi
What country would you most like to Visit: Japan and California,Though pilipinas i like sometimes
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: brown
Favourite Hair Color: black and white
Short or Long Hair: short..
Height: 6' and up i like tall...
Weight: uhm kinda slim, consider it malnourised..hehe joke
Best Clothing Style: uhm,Formal..and neat and clean
Number of Drugs I have taken: uhm, let ya think..hahaha
Number of CDs I own: 1000+
Number of Piercings: 50+
Number of Tattoos: i hate tattoos, but i wear henna sometimes.. like bad girls huh??
Number of things in my Past I Regret: uhm, i dont want to remember..Some things that so mean so much to me..but no way.... huhuhu

Extraordinary spirit Easily angered Angry when provoked Observant Careful and cautious Thinks quickly Independent thoughts Loves to lead and to be led Loves to dream Talented in the arts and defence Sensitive but not petty Learns to relax Hasty and rushy Romantic Loving and caring Loves to make friends -not particularly romantic, but I am interested in action.I mean business. -have no patience for flirting and can't be bothered with someone who is trying to be coy, cute, demure, and subtly enticing. I am an up-front person...
http://www.friendster.com/ricatokz (juzt type in).. .. http://www.myspace.com/ricatokz .. .. http://www.myspace.com/ricachansadsite .. .. http://www.hi5.com/rikachan .. .. http://www.friendster.com/ricachan .. .. or just search (RICATOKZ).. .. in yahoojapan.com /google.com /wakwak.com /yahoo.com,/Hi5.com etc...
..Oopss,to all who's viewing my site.. .. BEWARE to those people who tried to used my pictures.. i think they are nothin' to do in theyr own lives!.. Huh?? what the heck? o People are people!!i wanna meet Spiderman, Superman Or Mr. Dracula.. And Sugiyama

Heroes:

♥ SUGIYAMA ♥ daijin no hito...(ZUTTO DAISUKI no hito) itsumademo♥♥
RICATOKZ !! that's mE!?!(Hahahah).... An idiot hero.. Soon you'll meet Her.. (hehehe) goodluck!.. Watashi wa ♥RICA-CHAN♥ desu .. .. Yoroshiku Onegaishimasu..

My Blog

the hardest feeling and plans to make... i dont need any alibi..

in my life im giving out all best..i tried to be more patient and take it very simply not to hurt, i know im young but im at the right age to understand whats the meaning of true love is..Some other m...
Posted by u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out on Sat, 30 Jun 2007 12:21:00 PST

all of you shit people,Stop messaging me,what the heck u thinkin,dont mess w/ me..

stop that.. what ever your purposed is i may not believe you... what the heck?? stop putting words.. whatever may you say i wont believe you.even this is true or not, i can make it... dont mess with t...
Posted by u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out on Fri, 29 Jun 2007 04:44:00 PST

im not like her,im not like them,i am different to what u think.. im not also a fool,dont play

i brought you here so that i can express the things i've been thinkin bout give me your ear.cuz i don't normally do this so bare with me through this. there are so many things that iwant to say. but l...
Posted by u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out on Fri, 29 Jun 2007 04:16:00 PST

LoVE' REASON<SEASON and LIFETIME.. 100% me

LOVED" REASON, SEASON & LIFETIME; People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When someone is in your...
Posted by u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out on Sun, 24 Jun 2007 11:12:00 PST

on my sadsite!?! i dont need to explain myselp..becoz this is me!!

on my sad site?? this a apart of my personality.. You know im not that strong..im still fight even when im down..im scared a lot of thing the most the words"GOODBYES"... all i know its just be...
Posted by u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out on Sun, 17 Jun 2007 09:06:00 PST

shared some points of life??

..It's almost like second nature for us to want something that we don't have. Sometimes we even become too focused at getting that something that we unconsciously (or most of the time consciously) ign...
Posted by u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out on Wed, 20 Jun 2007 09:26:00 PST

wagamama bakari de gomenasai ne.. ;(

wasurenaii yo..all the good things we have shared.. tada kimi no koto kokoro kara aishiteru zutto isshoni itai... wasurenaii yo...
Posted by u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out on Sat, 16 Jun 2007 07:36:00 PST

I dont want to miss anything..i know ill be happy someday even if I Cant..

now my life seems so sad and slow..which way i dont know where i wanna go..i feel so stupid now im so helpless and nothing..Oh my god,i never have supposed my life to feel this way.. why i always cry ...
Posted by u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out on Sat, 16 Jun 2007 07:16:00 PST

wHeN sHe cRies- www.myspace.com/ricachansadsite

The road I have traveled onIs paved with good intentions It's littered with broken dreams That never quite came true When all of my hopes were dyingHer love kept me trying And she ...
Posted by u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out on Fri, 15 Jun 2007 06:14:00 PST

huh, got tired but i need to answer.. aaahhh tsukareta na

1. Do you still talk to the person you FIRST kissed?NEVER 2. Have you ever seen your best friend cry?YES3. What kind of vitamins did you take as a kid?none,i think alcohol is the best vitamin..hahaha...
Posted by u can see it in my eyes,im all cried out on Sat, 09 Jun 2007 12:10:00 PST