About Me
Well, first off, I grew up in a little town called Germany, and well, it all started from there.As a little baby, I played with dirt, but that's a whole other story all together.What I'm trying to say is, motion film is my passion. And on the side, I like to play video games, because they are cool. But I wasn't making any money. So one day I say to myself, "Uwe, what are you going to do with yourself?" I said this after heating up some Ramen Noodles. Depressed, I fired up the ol' Sega Dreamcast, and started to play one of my favorite games, House of the Dead. I was really good at it, maybe the best House of the Dead player there ever was. I was so good at shooting the zombies, but what really got my attention was when the game suddenly took control of itself, and really became kind of like a movie. That's when it dawned on me, and I spilled my hot Ramen noodles all over my balls. I must make movies, based off of my favorite video games! YES!!!! That's it!!!! It will be so simple!!! Because my favorite games already have a concept to them, that saves me the time of coming up with one! All I have to do is find actors, a cameraman, and whatever else I need to make movies, then upload everything into Windows Movie Maker! I used all sorts of awesome effects and transitions, like dissolves, curtain-down, swirl, you know, real flashy high-tech stuff. Then I just got a bunch of my favorite Electronica music that I like to listen to, and put that into my movie, then I took about 50% of the budget and got some kickass slowed-down bullet CGI scenes done by a local printshop (the young man at the counter said he was going to school for that kind of stuff, and he did a wonderful job) The other 30% went to paying off the actors (I got the girls incredibly cheap, I guess the porn industry is doing well) renting the boat and the helicopter I used to get all the arial shots, the guns, the spring-boards (for when zombies need to pounce on their victims!) and then the rest I just took, because money is lots of fun!!! wheeeeeeee!!!! I like money!! And that's how I made House on Haunted Hill, one of the greatest movies I've ever seen!!!And from there, I've gone on to create more smash hits, including Alone in the Dark, BloodRayne, and Hunter: Reckoning is almost done but already it's better than King Kong ever will be!
