Nate "The Face" Klaer profile picture

Nate "The Face" Klaer

The next thing you know, there's money missing off the dresser and your daughter's knocked up, I see

My Interests

I'd like to meet:

Someone who can tell me how Carlos Mencia still has a career.%D%A%D%A
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Nate "The Face" Klaer
Birthday: Cinco de Mayo, '86
Birthplace: Tucson
Current Location: Chandler
Eye Color: Right-Brown, Left-Light Brown
Hair Color: Brown
Height: 5'9"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right
Your Heritage: A little bit of everything
The Shoes You Wore Today: I've been barefoot all day
Your Weakness: Bullets and Sharp Objects
Your Fears: Dying before I get to meet Bob Saget
Your Perfect Pizza: Mushroom, Jalapeno, and Pineapple
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Record an album, Complete a movie
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Secrest out!
Thoughts First Waking Up: My dog smells funny...
Your Best Physical Feature: My balls are actually very well cleaned and maintained
Your Bedtime: Because I'm in 3rd grade still
Your Most Missed Memory: I don't remember a lot of things
Pepsi or Coke: Diet Coke
MacDonalds or Burger King: BK
Single or Group Dates: Single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Arizona Iced Tea
Chocolate or Vanilla: Strawberry
Cappuccino or Coffee: Both
Do you Smoke: When I drink usually
Do you Swear: The fuck does that mean?
Do you Sing: And how!
Do you Shower Daily: Shower?
Have you Been in Love: Maybe
Do you want to go to College: Not really
Do you want to get Married: Eventually
Do you belive in yourself: I believe I can fly
Do you get Motion Sickness: Vertigo sometimes
Do you think you are Attractive: Should I?
Are you a Health Freak: No, though I am a vegetarian
Do you get along with your Parents: Yeah
Do you like Thunderstorms: Like 8 Bitches on a Bitch Boat
Do you play an Instrument: A few
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: School's been out...of course I have
In the past month have you Smoked: Read answer to last question
In the past month have you been on Drugs: No, crazy, I know
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Yes, crazy, I know
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Yes
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: A box? Who eats a whole box?
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: No, but I wish I had
In the past month have you been on Stage: No, but I wish I had
In the past month have you been Dumped: No, but I wish I...
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: No, but I wi...
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No, but I...
Ever been Drunk: No, b...wait..yes
Ever been called a Tease: Not that I know of, I'm more of a flirt
Ever been Beaten up: My brother once beat me with a football cleat
Ever Shoplifted: What? Are you a fuckin cop?
How do you want to Die: Heroically saving my family from the wreckage of a sinking ship
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: An astronaut! No! A fireman! No! Superman!
What country would you most like to Visit: France
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Doesn't matter
Favourite Hair Color: Doesn't matter
Short or Long Hair: Again, doesn't matter
Height: Shorter than me
Weight: Smaller than me
Best Clothing Style: Not goth or punk, and especially not emo
Number of Drugs I have taken: Quite a few
Number of CDs I own: Quite a few
Number of Piercings: None, not a fan of that shit
Number of Tattoos: None, but I may in the future
Number of things in my Past I Regret: 3,357 and counting!

CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

Music:

All kinds of stuff...folk....country.....polka......lately, I've been listening to a lot of Big and Rich....Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy...man...that's some insightful, inspiring lyrics right there. Truer words have never been spoken. John Lennon ain't got shit on Big and Rich....git er done, people, seriously!

Movies:

The Usual Suspects, The Shawshank Redemption, Pulp Fiction, Clerks, Schindler's List, Memento, American History X, Leon

Television:

90s shows of Nickelodeon and ABC, ATHF, Monk, Sealab, Family Guy, Robot Chicken, Late Late Night with Carson Daly...boy, that Carson Daly sure is funny!

Books:

"The Carrucan's of Kurrajong" by Jasmine Yuen

Heroes:

Cleavon Little, Danny Glover (the real Danny Glover), and Ernie Hudson

My Blog

Hunger Strike 'Til People Realize Dane Cook Isn't Funny

Okay, so maybe I'm not going to actually hunger strike, but after watching as much of "Tourgasm" as I could before feeling the need to slam my forehead into the washing machine for 12 hours, and as mu...
Posted by Nate "The Face" Klaer on Thu, 14 Sep 2006 04:50:00 PST

No Talent Ass Clowns Vol. 1: Orlando Bloom

This just in: Orlando Bloom is not gay, as was commonly believed. Yes, he does in fact enjoy sex with men, but that is because it has recently been discovered that Orlando Bloom is, in fact, a woman. ...
Posted by Nate "The Face" Klaer on Mon, 09 Jan 2006 03:54:00 PST

Exceptions to my hatred...

I just feel the need to post this as a follow up to my delayed series of things I hate. Just to re-iterate, I still hate all of the things I said I have, but here are some exceptions to those groups: ...
Posted by Nate "The Face" Klaer on Thu, 10 Nov 2005 12:30:00 PST

Random Thoughts and Observations...

- They found a hidden sex scene in Grand Theft Auto, which makes you wonder if there's other video games with hidden sex scenes. Like what if Mavis Beacon Teaches Typing has a hidden sex scene? You pu...
Posted by Nate "The Face" Klaer on Wed, 12 Oct 2005 05:18:00 PST

Things I Hate; Vol. 3: Clowns and the People Who Fear Them

Yeah, that's really just it. I fucking hate clowns. They are quite possibly the most pointless "people" on the planet, even worse than mimes. And I say that for two reasons: 1. Basically everyone can ...
Posted by Nate "The Face" Klaer on Tue, 06 Sep 2005 01:12:00 PST

Things I Hate; Vol. 2: The Anti-Smoking Brigade...

Well, I know that I said that volume 2 would be about our President George Bush, but there's far too much shit to hate about that asshole, so that'll be a bigger post down the line.For now, I am going...
Posted by Nate "The Face" Klaer on Wed, 17 Aug 2005 04:14:00 PST

Things I Hate; Volume 1: Mormons

This is a new bulletin/blog I'm going to be posting when I feel like it, wherein I will rant about certain things in this world I do not like or agree with.In this episode: Mormons.This is not to say ...
Posted by Nate "The Face" Klaer on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Are you there God? It's me, Shaniqua...

Dear God, I have a list in my latest prayer, so I will be listing them in no particular order: - House of Wax may have been a huge waste of time, but seeing Paris Hitlon die in a gruesome manner...
Posted by Nate "The Face" Klaer on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Kiss Johnny Depp (and get a free designer handbag)

I've come to find out, mostly in later years, unless you're reaching a landmark age, birthdays suck. All people do is punch you, make you drink a lot, and say "happy birthday" a lot. Birthdays are coo...
Posted by Nate "The Face" Klaer on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Chain mail may be the dumbest shit ever....

Oh no! I just opened up a chain mail letter and I have 20 minutes to send it to 20 people or else my dick will shrivel up and I'll be plagued to live the rest of my life with one ball and a small, wri...
Posted by Nate "The Face" Klaer on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST