To be honest i wish i was a kid again. When you sit and remember what it used to be like.. When you didn't understand anything fully and nothing mattered. The days i used to run down the hills in Richmond opposite my Grandma's. When i used to sit at her house and play with toy bricks. When she gave me a heated blanket and that was like the cutest thing ever. When playing at the park in Harrogate was fun. The Days where i appreciated taking a walk with my family and having a pic-nic. The days where i could sit at My Grandad's and play stupid board games for ages. The Days where we would go to the beach and build sandcastles and play runaway. The days where playing on two pence slot machines was fun. The Days where you truely appreciated the little things.
From that i turned into a little monster. A child who would want everything she could have. Someone who didn't realise what her family did for her. How hard her mother worked for her to keep the family. The way she would spend all her money on us and nothing on her meant nothing to me. I just took everything without giving..
As i grew older i started growing out of this. There's times in my life where i've really wanted someone there but it's never going to happen. Like when you wake up on a sunday morning and you want to go to Grandad's. When we go down to Richmond and instead of playing in the fields and with them toy bricks your visiting graves.
All this has made me realise alot and appreciate stuff more. A happy child or a happy family isn't about how much money you have or what latest games you have but what you do as a family and how your always there for each other.
Last year alot happened, part of growing up. Having all sorts of choices to make about pretty much everything. You always find these choices end up been based on what your friends think, what your parents think about the situation. To be honest this last couple of months has taught me its me thats got to make all these choices. It made me realise that living life how people want you to isn't always the best way. Recently i realised there always will be them few special people who support what you want. That shows you how life should really be. Its helped me realise lifes all about taking risks. living life to the full, living every day like its your last and taking stuff as it comes. It's all about to gigs, doing stuff that makes you happy, partys, picture perfect moments, friends.
It's now the start of summer and i have so much i want to do and so much i want to see. The most important thing i want to do this year though is keep the bunch of friends i have now 'cause to be honest there the most amazing people i've ever met. There a group of people i love more than anything and will do anything for. But they will also do stuff for me, be here for me when i need them! No matter what happens and what i come across and what i learn this year i want my friends by my side.
