I like to start small fires, small riots, and small population bursts. Sometimes people think I'm funny. Sometimes I look funny. I have a funny family, but I like them anyways. My hair is curly, yet I have delusions of gradeaur. I can't spell, but I got straight As in college. I have 3 slightly crooked fingers and purple toes. My favorite celebrity is Howie Mandel. I simply cannot live without ice cream. For some crazy reason, I can't figure out what I want to be when I grow up. At work they call me "smartie jr" but I'm too dumb to know why. I live with a giant and two midgets; my life is pretty darn good. My older sister used to tell me I laughed like a "hyena with the hiccups" and she used to make me look a chinawoman. How does one make twins you ask? It's a simple mixture of tequila and Bud Light. (can you believe it's that easy?) Once I fell down the boulevard when I was riding my pink, Barbie bike and I didn't know how to turn. I should have known my life would be berserk when my dad dropped me off to the wrong kindergarten class. Apparently neither of my childhood dreams of marrying Ozzie Smith nor Steven Tyler are coming true. Today, I was a SpaceCadet....Isaythatinonewordcausespacesareboring. When I have boogers I blow my nose. I hover when I pee in public. It's a boy, his name is Logan and he must be a future football player because he is doing touchdown dances in my tummy. And I think that's just about all you'd want to know about me.
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