Malia profile picture

Malia

Why don't they just make the whole plane out of the black box stuff??

About Me

I moved to Denver from a wee town in South Dakota a few years ago because I was running from the law. No, I'm kidding. I was actually escaping from prison. OK, no, that's not true either. I had to escape my abusive baby's daddy who was in prison. Yeah...that's the truth of it. ;-)Anyway, I found a city where the beer was more expensive but that's okay because they pay me a lot more here to do the monkey work I'm specially trained in (law stuff). I found some friends, began training for some marathons and finally met a normal guy who had all his teeth. Now I'm super happy but dammit if I can't figure out where I left that baby!

My Interests

Training for triathalons, pondering my future, dry humping, looking for my baby and touching others' boobs. Especially Amelia's. Mine are spectacular but hers run a close second.

I'd like to meet:

People with contagious diseases, who have spent time in any sort of institution and those with easy access to cheese.

Get image codes at: PhotoPox.com
Drugs and Art do not mix! Or do they!?!?!Mitch Hedberg on Conan O'Brien

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Music:

I have crap taste in music. I bought the first Ashlee Simpson CD the first day it came out. I actually stood in line! Well, it's not total crap, I did discover Modest Mouse on my own but that was just a fluke. 'Scuse me...I have to go buy the latest Lindsey Lohan single. :D

Movies:

On the other hand, I have great taste in movies. I like everything from the super sappy to the totally hardcore (like as in drama and adventure!)Pinkies UP! That's you...that's what YOU do!!!!!!

Television:

For more info in the artist, check out ttp://www.thesneeze.com/. Pretty much the coolest site EVER!TV rots your brain. No, seriously, I was hospitalized for six months back in '99 with TV induced brain rot...it smelled like rotten eggs. So now I just watch TV when I have to, or I'm bored. But I always stop before the brain rot sets in. You stink. You smell like beef and cheese! You don't smell like Santa.

Heroes:

My boobies. They get me everything I want!There are many ways to drink a Martini...and this is one of them! Cheersh!We all need Souper Heros!http://www.bentobjects.blogspot.com/