Jessica - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I live in Hollywood. My nicknames are all food related - Muffin, Pumpkin, Snickerdoodle...don't really know why. I love power tools and pretty dresses but have room for neither in my tiny apartment. I go to an awesome church and I love God. I love big pretentious museums and little pretentious coffee shops. Operas amaze me. I hate velvet ropes and am surprised at how often I find myself moving through them. I love a damn good musical number. Money baffles me. I like random, disconnected sentences. My friends throw great parties. I love photography. I'm a regular substitute teacher in the high school where Van Halen shot "Hot for Teacher." Do you know enough yet? Have you stopped reading? I love meeting new and weird people. I'm not easily bored. I get a kick out of riding my antique Schwinn to clubs. I sometimes let strange and disturbing things happen to me because I think it'll make a great story to tell later. I think the color red is incredible.
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My Interests

.. The Landlord on FunnyOrDie.com ..

Music:

The Arctic Monkeys, Athlete, Blind Boys of Alabama, Ella Fitzgerald, Ben Folds, Johnny Cash, Death Cab for Cutie, The Dandy Warhols, The Donnas, The Dresdon Dolls, Bob Dylan, The Faint, Franz Ferdinand, Gilbert and Sullivan (shut up! it's funny!), Glenn Gould, Handsome Boy Modeling School, Goldfrapp, The Gossip, Billie Holliday, Early Etta James, Norah Jones, Keane, The Killers, Monkee Torture (yay Glen!), The Ramones, The whole Rat Pack, Renee Flemming, The Rolling Stones, Sia, Snow Patrol, Starlight Mints, My Chemical Romance, Sarah Vaughn, Various operas, Verdi, Tom Waits, White Stripes, Wolfmother, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, blah, blah, blah...bunch of other stuff. I make no assumptions that I have good taste - I just know what I like - so all you crazy elitist music nazis can just calm down. You know who you are.

Movies:

The Notebook, Silence of the Lambs, Resevoir Dogs, Kill Bill, oh all Tarentino, Ken Burns' Mark Twain Documentary, Garden State, Amelie, Some Like it Hot, Fight Club, High Fidelity, various silent films. There are plenty of others I can't think of right now.

Television:

Trying to break the habit. Don't encourage me.

Books:

I love to read but I will probably never read a "Harry Potter" book. I'm sorry if that makes you hate me. "The Divinci Code" probably won't get picked up either. Or "The Secret." They just don't interest me. So STOP ASKING. I usually have a couple of books I'm in the middle of - just finishing up Salem's Lot right now.

Heroes:

My dad and mom. Can you blame me?

My Blog

When trying to pick up on a girl...

It is best not to ask for money first.Just a thought.When passing by Mann's Chinese Theater tonight, after being whistled at by Michael Myers I began to pass by Jack Sparrow who said, "Hey - I know yo...
Posted by Jessica on Sat, 24 May 2008 11:52:00 PST

Ask me one more time... I dare you.

Nosy Stranger: So do you have a boyfriend?Me: No.Nosy Stranger: What?? But you’re so pretty! Why not?What exactly are they expecting my response is going to be?"I was just waiting around for y...
Posted by Jessica on Tue, 18 Mar 2008 11:51:00 PST

The first oil paintings

As many of you know, I've decided to try one new thing every month.One of my previous months' new "things" was to try oil painting. Here they are!Snow WhiteBeauty and the BeastSleeping Beauty...
Posted by Jessica on Wed, 14 Nov 2007 08:34:00 PST

The girls are crying and clutching Dresden Dolls

To really get the full experience of this little video blog - you really need to view this in order.But if you're lazy and just want to see me in a white bikini - skip to the last two. Really th...
Posted by Jessica on Wed, 13 Jun 2007 06:09:00 PST

Secret Admirer

I received the following note in class yesterday:"Dear Ms. AdsitL is for the way you look at meO is for the way I can seeV is very very extra ordinaryE is even more than anyone can seeSecret Admirer"A...
Posted by Jessica on Sat, 26 May 2007 12:29:00 PST

That's it! I can finally quit my job! Woo hoo!

I just got the greatest job opportunity - through myspace!No - for reals! I'm going to retire from the temp business and quit substitute teaching.Check it out:"Hey girl, I noticed your pics on your p...
Posted by Jessica on Wed, 11 Apr 2007 03:04:00 PST

Intimate poetry from my hostessing days...

I have a big and bloody toeIt stops me when I need to goIt's filling up my shoe with bloodA biblically proportioned flood.The inside of my shoe staned red,And blood is rushing from my head,Bloody foot...
Posted by Jessica on Mon, 10 Jul 2006 11:32:00 PST

My Official Statement

As of last Saturday, June...whatever...2006, I am officially a graduate of the University of Oregon. So to all of you who said I'd never make it, who said I'd break under the strain of the acedemic p...
Posted by Jessica on Wed, 21 Jun 2006 06:59:00 PST

Sex, Tab, Chuck Norris and Dolemite- Josh's birthday was a success

Alright already! The photos for Josh's ridiculously late B-day party are up! Calm the crap down, people! I know it was the best party in the history of parties - but you were there!&...
Posted by Jessica on Wed, 15 Mar 2006 05:37:00 PST

I answer to no man!

Or woman, for that matter. That's right, I have joined the ranks of the few, the pround, the self-employed. After a semester of frantically and fruitlessly searching for an occupation that didn'...
Posted by Jessica on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST