"And I can sum Dan up in just one word: courage, dedication, daring, pride, pluck, spirit, grit, mettle, moxie and G-U-T-S, guts! Why, Dan's got more guts in his little finger than most of us have in our large intestine, including the colon!" - Colonel Steve McCroskey, Mrs.
I'm what you'd call a bad apple. I'm a jerk, a prick. I have a lousy "I'm better than you" attitude and I snub my nose at authority. I'm a user and abuser. I'll only break your heart and leave you wondering why you put up with me. I'm also a compulsive liar and this whole paragraph has been made up in the hopes you'll be more attracted to me.
I work for an event planning company. I do most of the grunt work, printing badges, ordering what's needed and qc'ing the database.
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I've started the....
Official Gay-Hetero Slang Candy Dictionary.
Enjoy!
Parameters:
Mildly faggy - could be used to describe both homosexual and heterosexual situations.
Highly faggy - can only be used in homosexual context.
Spree! - mildly faggy; used to describe ejaculation
Example: "The worst thing a boy can do is Spree! in my mouth without any warning."
Sweet Tarts - highly faggy; describes the lone female that accompanies a gaggle of gay men. Less offensive than fag hag.
Juju Bee (sp?) - mildly faggy; slang word for anus.
Everlasting Gobstopper - mildly faggy; slang for a sex toy.
Example: "Who needs a man when I've got my everlasting gobstopper?"
Lemonhead - mildly faggy; term used to describe someone who gives less than ideal oral sex.
Violet Crumble* - highly faggy; A gay man easily driven into dramatic hysterics.
Example: "After he gets dumped the best thing to do is just stand back and watch that Violet Crumble."
Tootsie Roll* - mildly faggy; self explanatory.
Fun Dip* - highly faggy; term used to describe a male on male one night stand.
Example: "The boy's good for a Fun Dip, but I wouldn't take him home to meet mother."
Blow Pop* - highly faggy; an older submissive man who dates younger men.
Skittles+ - mildly faggy; by-product of semen and fecal matter.
Pez+ - mildly faggy; extremely small genitalia.
Example: "I had to feel around at first before I could find the poor boy's Pez."
* - thanks go to Emily for this addition.
+ - thanks go to Laura for this addition.
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I'm a horrible writer, although to be fair, I haven't written much. I did manage to get an article printed in a fanzine about a year ago.
I'm left-handed, and therefore, superior.
I am a geek and have no personality.
Did I mention I have six fingers on my left hand?
