the most important thing for one to be is happy. i beleive that completely. but i have an unrealistic notion of what hapiness is, and i hope i get over that, because until then it will be unattainable. i dont hate anything or anyone. you're wrong in assuming that. but there are very few things that i actually like, and i wish to develop a passion for something that gives me satisfaction and fills the void in my life. friends will stab you in the back, love will screw you over, and everything happens for a reason. i promise. but id like to be proved wrong. im scared of being alone. in more ways that one. and im scared that i'll never find something that makes me happy. im scared of failure in the sense that ill spend my whole life searching for something thats not there. trust is something that i wish to find but i am often discouraged at how impossible it seems to trust someone.
"and i want so
badly to beleive
that there is truth
that love is real."
