Stay Green, Stay in the Woods, Stay Safe

I'd like to meet:

cliff richard. i would politely ask him to stop befouling the universe with his evil, satanic ways.
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: adam lebovits
Birthday: every single day of the year.
Birthplace: a moon of saturn, i forget which
Current Location: manchester
Eye Color: a completely new colour which i just thought of now. it's called "harushnumph"
Hair Color: brown
Height: 5ft11ish
Right Handed or Left Handed: righty tighty
Your Heritage: a relative of mine once offered the mayor of bristol a sandwich. the mayor declined, but strangely, he ate it anyway.
The Shoes You Wore Today: a shoe-based concoction of my own, which is made primarily out of hemp, bamboo, and small children.
Your Weakness: none.
Your Fears: none. go on. just try me.
Your Perfect Pizza: cheese, tomato, love, friendship, peace to all beings, olives.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: to bite my own elbow.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: "dementia eh? that's quite a turn on..."
Thoughts First Waking Up: wah! where am i? who am i? what is the reason for my existance? wherefore? whom? why? which?
Your Best Physical Feature: my ruthless sexual drive.
Your Bedtime: 7:30. promptly. after teeth and toilet, and a beaker of warm milk. i can read for five minuted beforehand.
Your Most Missed Memory: my first amnesia attack.
Pepsi or Coke: coke
MacDonalds or Burger King: neither. they are both the work of cliff richard. (satan)
Single or Group Dates: gangbangs
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: i enjoy ice tea. nestea merely sounds like a skin disease, where many small flightless birds grow on your arms and peck. forever.
Chocolate or Vanilla: chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee: cappuccino is a form of coffee. you idiot. yes to both.
Do you Smoke: if by smoke you mean read ordnance survey maps- guilty as charged
Do you Swear: fuck no.
Do you Sing: with the beauty of a thousand angels, backed up by luciano pavarotti in a dress. playing drums.
Do you Shower Daily: yes.
Have you Been in Love: i am incapable of emotion. you bastard.
Do you want to go to College: i want to run away.
Do you want to get Married: i want to run away.
Do you belive in yourself: this question does not apply. i am a spiritual entity which can move freely in and out of time and space, with a faint wooshing sound.
Do you get Motion Sickness: *slumps unconscious"
Are you a Health Freak: no. *twitches*
Do you get along with your Parents: i do
Do you like Thunderstorms: yes. "BOOM!" gets me every time.
Do you play an Instrument: i'll tell you round the back, in 20 minutes. come alone.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: i ate it.
In the past month have you Smoked: no, but i have been on fire.
In the past month have you been on Drugs: not particularly
In the past month have you gone on a Date: yes. and a fig.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: yes. and a fig.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: i have put oreo's in a blender, then when they were liquidised i left them on a shelf so i could drink them later. i came back and they had evaporated, leaving a note saying they would be back in 20 minutes. they returned in 26. i cried.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: i caught a live trout in my mouth.
In the past month have you been on Stage: no. i have a fear of stages.
In the past month have you been Dumped: no. but i have fallen over at least twice.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: i went fatty dipping. i jumped in the river wearing a huge coat and 12 jumpers. i floated.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: your heart. oh, me and my ways
Ever been Drunk: yes. a man mistook me for a bottle of evian, and tipped me up and started drinking my spinal fluid. he stopped eventually.
Ever been called a Tease: no, but my friend john was in the mall and got called a tease. you might just say he's a malteaser.
Ever been Beaten up: by a gang of asthmatics, when i was walking in the park. my fault, i should have heard them hiding.
Ever Shoplifted: i lifted the somerfield in cheadle for 2.6 seconds. it landed on my fingers and i was hospitalised for a week. i now have fingers made out of twiglets. great for poking.
How do you want to Die: being torn apart by a gang of care bears. i know they're capable.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: a professional frenchman.
What country would you most like to Visit: trumpton
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: none
Favourite Hair Color: none
Short or Long Hair: none
Height: none
Weight: some
Best Clothing Style: one shoe off and one shoe on. diddle diddle dumpling, my son john. the shoes must be velvet.
Number of Drugs I have taken: the nibbling of belgians produces a hallucinagenic effect. i once put 6 of them in a tube and sniffed them. i call it a brussels chaser.
Number of CDs I own: enough to block the average man into his house with no means of escape
Number of Piercings: all over. a person without bits of metal in their skin is useless as far as i'm concerned.
Number of Tattoos: one. of a horse, winking.
Number of things in my Past I Regret: just one. the time when i showed isaac newton my law of gravity. twat.

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Honest and a defender of the innocent.
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