Uncle Beefy

Describe myself...Hm. Tough one. I don't like to talk about myself, but I'll try. In the physical sense, I'm a big fella. I shop in the "husky" section, mostly. I don't particularly see any point in lying about this, as I'm not necessarily convinced it's a bad thing, and it's more or less self-evident upon making my acquaintance. Also, there doesn't seem to be all that much I can actually do about it. Raw data-wise, this means I'm 6'5", and fluctuate between 325 and 340 depending on what I've eaten that week. But, I'm light on my feet, quick with a smile and a pithy bon mot, and my friends know I'm more or less a teddybear. Most guys my size are. Typically, this is because we have absolutely nothing to prove.
Until VERY recently, I had butt-length wavy brown hair, but after 15 years of fighting with it (and against the perceptions it brought), I've adopted a slightly more conservative coiffure. I still cultivate some reasonably successful facial hair, which I keep sculpted and trimmed to near-Pythagorean precision. The reason for this is largely because it is not socially-acceptable for men to wear makeup outside the theatrical realm (which I have not occupied with any frequency for many moons), and well-tended face-foliage something I CAN maintain which dramatically improves my appearance. As for the rest of my face, I've more or less accepted it, and have long since internalized which lighting situations and angles result in the most flattering portraits. Pity that the former becomes darker, and the latter becomes more extreme as the D.O.B. field on my drivers' license recedes further into the mists of yesteryear; but, as ever, getting older certainly beats the trousers off of the alternative.
I'm college-educated (though I never got around to finishing my degree, and likely won't), and ridiculously creative to the point of lunacy. I have a deep and abiding love for all pursuits artistic...Whether this manifests itself in the form of creating things myself, or drinking in someone else's work, I'm equally satisfied. This means, unlike most who list high-falutin' interests in an attempt to appear erudite, I actually GO to concerts, theatre, museums, and the like.
I have the world's greatest friends. They're goodly enough to opine that I'm quick and funny, which I'm sharp enough to appreciate. I'm also unfailingly loyal to them, and all who earn (and keep) my trust. However, those who cross me do so only to their own detriment. Not that I'm the vindictive sort, mind you...But no-fault-of-mine bad karma seems to visit those who go out of their way to earn my ire with alarming reliability.
I've held a surprising litany of interesting jobs (costumed theme park character, drum shop salesman, nightclub bouncer, chef, touring actor, cyber-vigilante), but after years of trying, I'm finally able to say that I make my living doing what I'm really passionate about: Writing. I realize how lucky I am to be able to say this. Recently, I've also found a renewed vigor for the precise, structured art of screenwriting, and I'm feeling really confident about it. In addition, since relocating to the Minneapolis / St. Paul area in February of '07, I've joined a rock band...Playing drums on a regular basis again as I did all through my twenties. Good times.
I love to laugh, to travel, and to meet new people, though I never get as much of a chance to do any of those things as I'd like. Though, admittedly, if I did, I'd not have much (if any) time left for anything else. I also love sushi, cherry-flavored anything, museums, and my wife.
I think that about covers the basics, and thanks for reading. Anything else, feel free to drop me a line and ask me. I'm pretty much an open book.
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Jim
Birthday: Valentine's Day
Birthplace: Earth
Current Location: Also Earth. And Minneapolis.
Eye Color: My Driver's License says "HZ.". So..."HZ".
Hair Color: Brown.
Height: 6'5"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Southpaw.
Your Heritage: German and Irish.
The Shoes You Wore Today: Birkenstocks. Then, Chucks.
Your Weakness: Cute, curvy girls.
Your Fears: Big dogs and economic collapse.
Your Perfect Pizza: Cheese, sausage, mushrooms, canadian bacon, bacon bacon, and Altoids. But the mints are for after.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Continuity.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: I avoid cliches like the plague. HAR! See what I did there?
Thoughts First Waking Up: "I sure wish I were still sleeping."
Your Best Physical Feature: Until recently, I'd have said my hair. But it's gone, now. *(Sigh.)* In lieu of that...I've been told by more than one person that I have a good nose. So I'll take it.
Your Bedtime: When I bloody well feel like it.
Your Most Missed Memory: Lilacs in spring. Why can't they be around longer?
Pepsi or Coke: Dr. Pepper.
MacDonalds or Burger King: White Castle.
Single or Group Dates: It's all good.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Cherry.
Cappuccino or Coffee: Latte.
Do you Smoke: No.
Do you Swear: Colorfully so.
Do you Sing: Yes, and I'm told I sing quite well, though I'm disinclined to believe it. I have won a few karaoke contests, though, so maybe they're right.
Do you Shower Daily: Sometimes twice.
Have you Been in Love: You betcha.
Do you want to go to College: Not again.
Do you belive in yourself: If not me, who?
Do you get Motion Sickness: No.
Do you think you are Attractive: If the light's just right.
Are you a Health Freak: Hell, no.
Do you get along with your Parents: Very well. They're good people.
Do you like Thunderstorms: No. They worry me.
Do you play an Instrument: Several.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Um...Lemme think...I don't think so, no.
In the past month have you Smoked: No.
In the past month have you been on : Been on what? Drugs are bad.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: I suppose that depends on your definition.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Where else am I supposed to get Orange Julius? Mmm. Orange Julius.
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: No. A few handsful, but not a whole box.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: YES, YES, YES. WOW, how I love the stuff.
In the past month have you been on Stage: I've been on enough stages to last me a lifetime.
In the past month have you been Dumped: No.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: I don't skinny dip. I chunky dunk.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Just kisses.
Ever been Drunk: A few times.
Ever been called a Tease: No. Teasing SUCKS. It's very simple. If you're not interested...Don't act like you are! Why advertise that which you have no interest in selling?
Ever been Beaten up: Not hardly.
Ever Shoplifted: I plead the fifth.
How do you want to Die: I don't.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Happy.
What country would you most like to Visit: Australia
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Doesn't matter.
Favourite Hair Color: Doesn't matter.
Short or Long Hair: Long is awesome, but short is hella cute, too.
Height: Shorter than me. Not that that's difficult.
Weight: Bony chicks need not apply. No junk in the trunk or spice on the rack, they're off the hook, and I'm throwin' 'em back. I like curves.
Best Clothing Style: Open
Number of CDs I own: Too many to count.
Number of Piercings: 2
Number of Tattoos: 11
Number of things in my Past I Regret: We are all an amalgam of our cumulative experience. So, being as I like who I am: ZERO.....