The General

Aim.....wtrashmike
Bro Rules:1. If you are ugly, you don’t exist.
2. Beer always sucks, but is always worth it…always.
3. Lindsey Vandervelde is HHHOT!
4. Green is the color of the Bro.
5. 3 of 5 redheads are hot, the rest are dudes.
6. Victoria is stacked.
7. Hookah is da-bomb.
8. Girls don’t fart, poop, or anything like that. (or they’re really dudes)
9. Techno is heck-no unless it is Prodigy or Gunther and the Sunshine Girls.
10. Gnar skim rules.
11. We ain’t gay.
12. We AIN’T gay.
13. Peeling out is cool.
14. Hostesses are HHHOT!
15. Malmsteen and Entwhistle are ultimate.
16. Best accuracy while driving is achieved while drunk.
17. Jazz is “sick nasty”
18. Mustangs bear hot bitches.
19. Bongo is alive and kickin’ ass.
20. Farts are ALWAYS funny.
21. Blazers or a Jimmy are Bro-Trucks.
22. Bro’s love titties.
23. Bro’s are HHHUNG.
24. Bro’s get Hoes. (Bras)
25. Shut up.
26. You cannot hide from Bro-horn.
27. All blondes love “D.”
28. OSI rules.
29. Jessica Alba is Queen Hotness.
30. You are not Bro & will never be bro…so stop trying…Broser.
31. We dress ugly and still get bitches.
32. Girls love to be called “Bitches.”
33. Bone Thugs are Boss.
34. NECRO sucks, but we listen to him anyway.
35. Bro’s are NEVER wrong.
36. Boo-boo is imminent.
37. Beezy is king of cheap food and all food.
38. DERTS are wussy.
39. Real men have mustaches and/or beards.
40. Saucony is shoe of the Bro.
41. Girls aren’t “Bras” until t hey show titties.
42. A high-five will be awarded when Bro’s are pleased.
43. If you have an imperfection we will exploit you.
44. Stoess is Boss.
45. Bro-truck is invincible.
46. Lying is both cool and funny.
47. Bro’s are the reason size matters.
48. Blaming others for your problems is morally right.
49. Pornography is cooler and superior when homemade.
50. Lamb Tacos are infinitely excellent.
51. WWF is for Mullets and people with small weenies.
52. Bro rules are subject to change without notice at Bros convenience.
53. Commitment is for sissys.
54. Thrift stores are home to the latest fashions, such as “ugly.”
55. Bro’s listen to no one.
56. No one is immune to burns.
57. If a burn is made a high five will be had.
58. If a burn is excellent, the high five will be recharged.
59. If you fight a Bro, you will NEVER win.
60. bitch got beave bitch gotta leave!