junkie profile picture

junkie

though it starts with your fist, it must end with your mind.

About Me

i shouldn't have to tell you how old i am. i shouldn't have to tell you i'm female. i shouldn't have to tell you i have red hair and blue eyes.no, these are things i shouldn't have to tell you. i should be telling you the things you don't know. that laughing with my daughter is the highlight of my day. that putting my son to sleep makes my heart ache because he is the last bit of life this battered body will ever create.he is the last in his line.i will tell you my favorite color is pink and stick to that lie. i am terrified of bees and wasps and will tell you i am allergic so i don't look like such a wimp. i pretend i am a badass because it is easier than being emotional sometimes. i can be sarcastic but i mostly try to be kind. i am the most forgiving person you will ever meet (ask anyone who's trampled me). i will hold your secrets. i will hold grudges. i will do anything for you that is within my means. i have two ex-husbands, both of whom i am pleasant with. i am letting go of my past. it scares me more than you will ever know.i secretly aspire to be an artist but i have little time to perfect it. i am an avid writer. i can't play blackjack but i can beat your ass in poker. i am a recovering drug addict and former alcoholic. i am very honest and will tell you whatever it is i need to. i will not sugar coat things. i am more shy than you can ever imagine. i hate myself for the things i've done but not for who i've become. don't tell anyone, but i'm not as fat as i think i am.i am constantly changing, evolving and day-to-day nothing is the same except for what you knew before you read this.i am twenty-two. i am female. i have red hair and blue eyes."Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? Fall head over heels. I say find someone you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. I'm not hearing any heart. Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love - well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived."--anthony hopkins, meet joe black

My Interests

too lazy to do this on my own
.. Now Icons

I'd like to meet:

bah. i hate these questions. there are so many people i want to meet; family that has adopted me from overseas via friends to ghandi to...hell, pick a random person on the street. people are interesting to me. everyone's got a different story painted in their eyes, on their lips-- a hidden truth within themselves they've been waiting to share. i want to hear all of these. i want my own personal collection that i can pick and recall whenever the mood strikes.

Music:

dropkick murphys, the aggrolites, the tossers, great big sea, flogging molly, tim armstrong, regina spektor, linkin park, mighty mighty bosstones, sublime, green day, old school no doubt, johnny cash, ozzy, meatloaf, 311, mb20, three dog night, mindless self indulgence, crossfade, coldplay, fear factory, blink 182, the who, jimmy hendrix, motley crue, ac/dc, pink floyd

Movies:

i am sam, gothika, the ring, peter pan, hook, we were soldiers, braveheart, the panic room,the professional, from hell, hellboy, benny and joon, romeo and juliet, the bourne identity and supremecy, triple x, the majestic, the truman show, the passions, secrets of the ya-ya sisterhood, steel magnolias, home is where the heart is, someone like you, identity, man in the moon, forrest gump, big fish, edward scissorhands, fight club, nightmare before christmas, beetlejuice, dogma, the prophecy, natural born killers, pulp fiction, the punisher, swordfish, the rock, face-off, strangeland, interview with a vampire, jason vs. freddy...and the list goes on as i watch more and more.

Books:

you are here, shanghai baby, theory of relativity, coinlocker babies, crackpots, obsidian butterfly, freak the mighty, when we were gods, house of leaves, dracula, frankenstein, the killing dance, comfort & joy, clockwork orange, animal farm, in babylon, salem's lot, going nuclear, yiddish with dick and jane, layover, the zygote chronicles, the complete works of poe, shakespeare, the language instinct...

Heroes:

what, exactly, is a hero? is it someone who saves you from peril? from destruction? or someone who is there to hold your hand, drag you forward when your body ceases to function and your brain is screaming obscenities? or is it a person, a being, that completes you wholey? who knows you best inside and out and with just a look is able to capture your emotion and return a glance as if to tell you it will all be just fine?i have many heroes. most of them are my friends. four of them are my children. one is my husband. but, my greatest hero is myself.after all. no one can save you except for you.

My Blog

it's all about the delivery.

before i go anywhere with this, i must make a few things crystal clear: i am far too emotional for my own well being (and yours). and if you know what's good for you, you'll write this off as incohere...
Posted by my girl friday on Fri, 30 Mar 2007 10:51:00 PST

something a little fun with a cracker jack's prize for good measure (update)

we're going to play a game. :)(this will be fun, i swear!) i'm going to provide you with a list of songs that make up the soundtrack of the fifteen people i hold nearest and dearest to me. you get to ...
Posted by my girl friday on Thu, 29 Mar 2007 05:32:00 PST

problem: heartache. solution: avoidance.

So kiss me and smile for me,Tell me that you'll wait for me,Hold me like you'll never let me go.Cause I'm leaving on a jet planeDon't know when I'll be back again i'm going on hiatus.like the song sa...
Posted by my girl friday on Thu, 22 Mar 2007 02:17:00 PST

fkkn' gome(!) bitches!

minor update: i have roughly ten pages. for those of you keeping track that means i wrote seven of them today. i am half-way to my goal of twenty by sunday. gome! (and, of course, i figure at this rat...
Posted by my girl friday on Thu, 22 Mar 2007 09:40:00 PST

three pages. three hours. wtf more do you want from me?

the blog title kind of sums it up nicely. i have written three pages in the last (roughly) three hours. i'm sure i'd have more if i didn't get so fkkn' hung up on minute details. and if i didn't put s...
Posted by my girl friday on Wed, 21 Mar 2007 08:22:00 PST

devon, i owe you ten bucks.

and for the rest of you cheap bastards:   buy it. :)   (yes, yes, so i took vincent's advice and put it on lulu. i'm totally killing it on cafepress. might i add, though, that setting it up...
Posted by my girl friday on Sun, 04 Mar 2007 02:23:00 PST

question for the masses.

and i'm kind of hoping people will actually take the time to answer:   if you subscribe to my blog, what made you do it? if it was a post, which one?   just a curious, random question, reall...
Posted by my girl friday on Sun, 04 Mar 2007 12:50:00 PST

oh happy day.

i. am.a.demigod. why? because in two whole hours (combined), if that, i whipped up the story line for two children's books. one for each of my babies. now all that's left is to stop making excuses and...
Posted by my girl friday on Sun, 04 Mar 2007 12:47:00 PST

and...it's done. so long and good night.

two things: one- i am rather accomplished. not only did i get ninety percent of my housework done in a rather short period of time but i also sat down and wrote a children's book about when my son was...
Posted by my girl friday on Sat, 03 Mar 2007 10:30:00 PST

stick that in your juice box and suck it.

this was almost titled 'frankie goes to hollywood: part two.' but, i much prefer what it is because, well, that's how i feel, folks. for the last three months, my life has been hell because (apparentl...
Posted by my girl friday on Thu, 22 Feb 2007 06:54:00 PST