"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die."
I have to start by saying that I'm just having a little fun... If you don't like what I have to say, I don't care. Go elsewhere.
Ok, I've been getting a lot of flak from some people for my profile being too "self loathing", so I've decided to add some positive things; maybe this will somehow balance my life in some spiritual sense, allowing everything around me to go well, and hopefully birds will stop shitting on my car!.....
The Good: First off, I'm not always an asshole. I also have a soft spot for animals. For instance: If I see someone hurting an animal, I want to turn the tables and beat that person mercilessly, until they can't function.... Ok, that's a bit overboard. My intentions are usually good. I'm loyal to a fault (that's the Leo in me). I know a good beer when it hits my lips. Damn, I'm running out of things here already. I'm somewhat intelligent (see "The Bad & Ugly" below for why this doesn't always apply). I'm usually logical and rational...usually. I like the great outdoors. On a more serious note: I'm adventurous, spontaneous, dependable, independent, assertive, passionate, honest (most of the time), versatile, strong-willed, and laid-back for the most part. What you see is what you get with me; nothing fake here. I have a softer heart than I would let on or indicate to others. I'm working on being more patient; this is definitely a life-long learning experience for me. I like to help people out without being asked. I'm all about having fun and laughing it up. I'm always the one in the group trying to make things happen, and I love to get everyone together and have a party. I'm pretty much a big kid, and I still like to go through the toy section at department stores. I'm realistic, and "structured" (as my friends say). I work to live, not live to work. I take personal hygiene seriously.
The Bad & Ugly: If you take this part too seriously, you're probably too uptight and should stay away from me; I'm just having some fun. I'm a perfectionist, a realistic-pessimist, a smart ass, stubborn, a bit of a short-fused, hot-head, and more of an asshole than you can probaly deal with on some occasions. I swear too much (like a pirate some might say); I even swear in my sleep sometimes (I'm trying to work on this). My mouth gets me in trouble, and I say what's on mind, even when I know the person won't like it. 2 cents is a joke...I always have to get my $1.50 in. I am NOT a morning person. Since I'm "structured" (as my friends say), I go a little crazy when I can't control things, which usually results in me doing something incredibly dumb. I'm not always logical and rational. I get bored of things when they lose their newness; sometimes this includes people. I struggle with patience, or my lack there of it. I think most people are complete idiots, and I often wonder how the world gets by with so many of them in it. The problem with all this?: I have a zero tolerance for morons and stupidity...go figure. Loud, obnoxious people that command attention annoy me. When I drink, I lose most of my so-called "intelligence" and have been known to do incredibly stupid things like, but not limited to: falling & hurting myself by breaking bones and/or teeth, ligaments, and tearing flesh from the bone. I've gotten docile in my old age, so I don't enjoy physical confrontations, and I'm ready to settle down...that could probably go in "The Good" section.
The Weird: My memory is terrible, and I'm always forgetting things like, birthdays, how long it's been since ___(fill in the blank); I think I might have degenerative memory loss, and I was this way before I started drinking. I don't like my picture taken. I'm a little bit obsessive compulsive, and somewhat of a clean freak. I baby powder my goods after showering...what's wrong having your stuff smell good?? I could spend a good part of the day just wondering through Target checking out stuff. I'm scared of public restrooms, and do my best to stay away from them. Other people's keyboards at work are NASTY! I get embarrassed easily by the stupid shit people do; this happens quite often while watching television, and I have to change the channel. I hate to talk on the phone for more than 5 minutes, but I'm ok with texting at an obscenely large rate. I have to iron most everything I wear before I wear it...and I'm good at it too. Yes, I even iron my jeans on occasion. I'm a middle man. I love vacation, so I work too many days a year in order to take one. I always seem to be 3 shades whiter than the person next to me for some reason. I can usually sense when I'm being lied to. There are lots of little quirks I will add as I remember them.
"When my time on Earth is gone, and my activities here are past, you can bury me upside down, and my critics can kiss my Ass!" - Robert Montgomery Knight

WELCOME TO THE GUN SHOW!

I see all the other guys on MySpace had to take their shirts off, so I figured why not too?
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Kristopher
Birthday: August 15, 1977
Birthplace: Indianapolis
Current Location: Indianapolis
Eye Color: Hazel
Hair Color: Dark Brown
Height: 5'-11"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right
Your Heritage: I'm a mutt: German, French, Algonquin Indian, Irish and who knows what else.
The Shoes You Wore Today: Kenneth Cole
Your Weakness: French Fries, Booze
Your Fears: Spiders, Burning or Drowning, paralization.
Your Perfect Pizza: I like Bazbeaux Alla Quattro Formaggio- YUM!
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Getting my LC (Lighting Consultant Certification)
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: lol
Thoughts First Waking Up: What day is it?
Your Best Physical Feature: hmm, my hair I guess.
Your Bedtime: When I'm sleepy - around 10:30 during the week.
Your Most Missed Memory: Riding my bike with my friends when I was a kid.
Pepsi or Coke: Doesn't matter to me.
MacDonalds or Burger King: McD's, but I try not to eat that stuff.
Single or Group Dates: Single - Group dates seem defensive.
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: I don't care.
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate for sure. Vanilla is, well Vanilla!
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee
Do you Smoke: No, I quit 3 yrs ago.
Do you Swear: I can't say my favorite word here.
Do you Sing: Sure
Do you Shower Daily: Yes.
Have you Been in Love: Yes.
Do you want to go to College: I've been, and I hate studying.
Do you want to get Married: Yes, eventually.
Do you belive in yourself: To do what?
Do you get Motion Sickness: I get sick on any amusement ride that does circles repeatedly.
Do you think you are Attractive: I'm a 6.
Are you a Health Freak: No.
Do you get along with your Parents: Yes.
Do you like Thunderstorms: Yes.
Do you play an Instrument: No, I wish I did.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: A better question is: Have you drank Alcohol this week?
In the past month have you Smoked: No
In the past month have you been on Drugs: No, and if I have been, I wouldn't say yes on here.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Does going out w/ the girfriend count?
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Yes
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: No, I think they're foul.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: A few times
In the past month have you been on Stage: No
In the past month have you been Dumped: No
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: No
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No
Ever been Drunk: Yes
Ever been called a Tease: Yes
Ever been Beaten up: Yes
Ever Shoplifted: Yes, but I was young and dumb. Dumber than I am now I should say.
How do you want to Die: In my sleep, or in a firey ball of flames and smoke.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Oh shit!, I just now realized that I AM grown and I'm not what I wanted to be when I grow up.
What country would you most like to Visit: Ireland or Germany...yeah I know it only asked for one.
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: No preference
Favourite Hair Color: This is an incriminating question for me.
Short or Long Hair: Long
Height: Not taller than me.
Weight: Not bigger than me.
Best Clothing Style: I like some sophistication. Nice shoes on a girl is a big turn on.
Number of Drugs I have taken: ?
Number of CD's I own: Let me get out my calculator.....yeah right.
Number of Piercings: 0...even though my ear shows an old one.
Number of Tattoos: 0
Number of things in my Past I Regret: Quite a few, but that's how you learn.
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