Zanne profile picture

Zanne

Cultivate your curves--they may be dangerous, but they won't be avoided. - Mae West

About Me

No shy, wilting flower here. I'm a red-headed, left-handed, Jewish Gemini with a fabulous rack and a wit sharp enough to slit your wrists on. "Sweet" is not an adjective that anyone would use in my direction. Frequently accused of possessing inappropriate humour and suffering from chronic flippancy. Obviously, I'm bothered by this... Quote to live by: "Being a redhead, one simply must accept having to perform a certain amount of damage control." - unknown but obviously wise redhead Most Often Used Phrase: "Yes, they're real, and no, you can't touch them!" Voted Most Likely to Hide Human Remains in Their Basement in high school. And I wasn't even goth! Life Goals: Making sure that my liver gives out before I get wrinkles. I've already spent the money for botox treatments on cocktails. More fun facts: I'm coulrophobic (look it up). Also, I loathe reality television, and I've never even seen one episode of Friends or the trampy housewife show. Dislikes: Mayo, flip-flops, pouty significant others, nose hair, Renee Zellweger, "Wal-Mart people", breeders who inflict their progeny upon us, and "that fish smell". Biggest Contribution to the Planet: Switching to rechargeable batteries. What I'm known for: Making kickass mojitos, unrivaled cleavage, and smelling like grapes (if you don't get it, you probably don't want to know).

My Interests

Dancing, teaching dance, traveling, going for dinner and cocktails with friends, makeup artistry (I do theatrical and drag makeup), writing, reading, kicking my friends' asses at Trivial Pursuit...

I'd like to meet:

Fun people. Loud, witty, bitchy, obnoxious, drunk people who like laughing and love to dance. Anyone who can follow along with The Kevin and Zanne Show. People who enjoy crowded, noisy bars, and who can appreciate the fine art of People Watching. People with great laughs and big smiles. No Pollyannas - nice people are creepy. Biggest Turn Offs: Flip-flops, people who blame their parents for the fact that they're losers, and people who use the phrases, "Be nice" and "Can't we all just get along?" in my presence.

Music:

Rockabilly, old punk, 80's new wave, jump blues, classic western... Locally (Seattle): Vinyl Avengers/Gold Spikes, Ruby Dee and the Snakehandlers, the Roy Kay Trio, The Haggis Brothers, and Foot Stompin' Trio.

Movies:

The Wisdom of Crocodiles, Six-String Samurai, Bubba Ho-tep, Mind the Gap, Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?, The Last Supper (um, it's NOT the one about Jesus), 24 Hour Party People, The House of Yes, Mindwalk, The 25th Hour, Donnie Darko, Tristram Shandy: A Cock and Bull Story, 200 Cigarettes, Cement, and basically anything with Liev Schreiber, Parker Posey, Fairuza Balk, or Bruce Campbell (must be the chin). Films by Kevin Smith, the Coen Brothers, Noah Baumbach, and Wes Anderson. I despise all things Steven Spielberg. I'll watch any dance or ice skating movie, and have a weakness for zombie flicks, but my scary movie buddy moved to Boston last year.

Television:

This Life, Teachers (UK), Arrested Development, Wonderfalls (rent the DVDs, people!), Freaks and Geeks, Doctor Who, Dead Like Me, Coupling (UK version), Square Pegs, The Fast Show, Brasseye, This is Wonderland, Deadline, Homicide: LOTS, Chef!, Metrosexuality, Parker Lewis Can't Lose, Robson Arms, Real Time with Bill Maher. I abhor all realilty television, and feel that it pretty much sums up what is wrong with the country today. I'm also secretly fan of Buffy and Angel.

Books:

Wisdom of Crocodiles, The Counterlife, Zuckerman Bound, Les Liaisons Dangereuses, Darwin's Radio, Idiot Girls' Action Adventure Club, An Underacheiver's Diary, Lucky Jim, Einstein's Monsters, Other People, Vanity Fair (the novel, not the magazine), Canterbury Tales, poetry of Alun Lewis, wit of Oscar Wilde, the darkness of Poe, The World According to Garp, If You Can't Live Without Me, Why Aren't You Dead Yet? If it's on Oprah's reading list, I certainly haven't read it.

Heroes:

William Katt. He's the greatest. If you're too young to get that, then you're too young to be reading my profile.