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Lu

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been wid

About Me

I'm so hip I have trouble seeing over my pelvis. I'm so cool you could keep a side of meat in me for months. I'm just this guy, you know?

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My Interests

I've got a few general interests. You're probably not on the list.

I'd like to meet:

Please don't bother e-mailing me. Most of you write like troglodytes and bore me. I don't have time to date right now and I have friends with whom I am pretty happy.

Music:

I will listen to anything. Whether or not I will kill you for making me listen to some hippie, tree-hugging, pinko commie bullshit, however, is up in the air.

Movies:

Movies that make me think and laugh are good. Movies that make me sad are not. Usually. Unless I change my mind. I dig the moving pictures.

Television:

I like the boob tube but I don't watch it. I do, however, watch television shows. I would totally watch it if it were, in fact, a tube with boobs. How cool would that be? You sit on a couch with a few friends, some popcorn with tabasco and a beer, and you watch some cylindrical object in front of you covered in sweater kittens.I now like t.v.

Books:

All of them. I love books. They make me feel smart, they make me feel sad, they make me feel happy... they make me feel. Books are good for the vicarious experiences and the learning. What else do you want?

Heroes:

I don't do heroes. A hero implies this is a person you aim to be; I aim to be myself. Just, y'know, a slightly improved version.

My Blog

Laziness and Un-PCness

I'm too lazy to pack lunch most of the time. Often, I run over the Safeway and grab a bowl of soup or a salad. It's easy, cheap, and fast. I was there about a week ago and while I was at the cash r...
Posted by Lu on Thu, 31 Jan 2008 10:12:00 PST

Im bringing sexy back

So, apparently I have a sex phone operator's voice. If you work at 1-900-SEX-LINE and you sound like you're constantly reciting code sections, I think we both got screwed.I re-did my voicemail for th...
Posted by Lu on Wed, 30 Jan 2008 02:32:00 PST

My cell phone should have a breathalyzer on it

Seriously. Did I tell you I don't want to see you anymore? Did I decide, rationally and thoughtfully and carefully, with sisters and friends that you are simply not up to snuff? Or, did I have some...
Posted by Lu on Tue, 29 Jan 2008 12:17:00 PST

I got banged for the first time since sixth grade!

It was a big change, I wasn't sure I was ready for it... but I got bangs. I'm pretty excited about it, frankly. I'm not, however, excited to have snooty hairdressers condescend to me.The chick is at...
Posted by Lu on Mon, 28 Jan 2008 12:53:00 PST

My heart hurts

For those who don't read SP's blog, he posted about the top 100 quotes from some Christian chat room. Reading this hurts something deep inside of me (maybe I do have a soul?). He didn't have the lin...
Posted by Lu on Wed, 23 Jan 2008 06:39:00 PST

The best present I ever gave

..Adorable? Or mind-numbingly stupid little beast?They have to eat roughly one forest of bamboo per Panda per day and turn their little noses up at anything else. Bamboo flowers, seeds, and dies eve...
Posted by Lu on Wed, 16 Jan 2008 08:37:00 PST

I always get the fuzzy end of the lollipop

I came in Sunday night to get some work done at the office. I was here until 8:30 p.m. to prepare for crap that had to go out Monday. However, little did I realize that wouldn't leave me with any im...
Posted by Lu on Tue, 15 Jan 2008 07:50:00 PST

Dantes Buffalo Wings

..Last night I did my usual Monday thing, same group of friends as always... We get together, have a few drinks, sometimes eat some food, shoot the shit. Always fun. Last night, a friend Paul made a...
Posted by Lu on Tue, 15 Jan 2008 10:04:00 PST

Ever had a family member accidentally get you sick porn?

I have apparently. My father got everyone these little 2008 calendars as one of the Jewish versions of stocking stuffers. One was cartoons, one was classical paintings and mine was filled with pulp ...
Posted by Lu on Mon, 14 Jan 2008 07:08:00 PST

I’m Sorry

It has finally come to my realization that treating a guy like a friend and simultaneously, even accidentally, flirting with him is fucking mean. It never really occurred to me before. You know that...
Posted by Lu on Thu, 10 Jan 2008 12:50:00 PST