Jesus - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Isn't this Blasphemy?
ATTENTION: The one who types on my behalf does not in any way believe that he is or will ever be Me. For more info click on the above link. I will no longer reply to messages about this subject, unless it is left as a comment on the relating blog. Which again you can get to by clicking the link above entitled, "Isn't this Blasphemy?"
It all began years ago in a small backwater town in the West Bank. My father built tables and chairs and my mother was a homemaker. We were a family of humble means and my dad did all he could to raise a healthy, happy son.
The next 30 years were really a blur. As I entered my early 30's, I had gained a very dedicated following of admirers, as well as a rather notorious group of skeptics. People came from miles around to hear me lecture on things like love, compassion, and fishing.
So that's Jesus H. in a nutshell. I'll update my page often, as I'm sure you'll have plenty of questions for me and my apostles, but Please read my blogs before you accuse Me of blasphemy or ask a question. I might have already answered your response.You should create your own MySpace Layouts like me by using nUCLEArcENTURy .COM's MySpace Profile Editor !

My Interests

Hanging out with my friends, turning water into wine, not shaving for weeks at a time, moonwalking on water, taking my buddies out to lunch, healing the blind, causing trouble down at the synagogue and playing soccer. In sandals.

I'd like to meet:

All the little children of the world: red, yellow, black and white. They're all precious in my sight.
For a good local church, Click Here

Music:

My passion is klezmer, but my taste is quite eclectic. I like Johnny Cash, black Michael Jackson, Led Zeppelin, Diana Ross, Tupac Shakur, The Beatles (post 1965), and Men at Work.

Movies:

I have to tell you, I don't have much time to watch movies anymore, plus it's almost impossible to find VHS tapes these days. I will tell you, however, that Mel Gibson directed the best film in history: Braveheart. I also recommend that everyone sees Invisible Children

Television:

I call that the Idiot Box. Since the croc hunter is with me now, I really have no need for cable anymore.I'm not a big fan of talk radio but I do have a show. However KFI has politely asked Me to specify that the one who types is not associated with KFI and the program.For new cool daily videos check out realfusion.com

Books:

Let me start by saying this. "The Da Vinci Code"; what a load of garbage. I was never married, folks. The one time I ever got close, my old lady started nagging me to trim my 'stache. I wasn't having that. That said, I'm a huge fan of Mark's work.

Heroes:

My Dad.

My Blog

Understanding Pain

I have heard the cries of many of my children in the midst of their many pains, and I want you to know, that I am there with you in those times. I have spent many nights sharing your tears. ...
Posted by Jesus on Fri, 02 May 2008 04:17:00 PST

I AM Risen!

I AM Risen Indeed!Today is a good day. Today we celebrate My resurrection, My secret plan to radically change this world forever. I kind of laugh now looking back on when I told the disciples about ...
Posted by Jesus on Sun, 23 Mar 2008 08:25:00 PST

RealFusion.com Interview

OK so here it is, the first ever video interview with the one who types. Thats right the one who types drove out to LA to shoot this interview with realfusion.com. Just a warning, the one who types v...
Posted by Jesus on Thu, 28 Feb 2008 07:45:00 PST

Love

Throughout the world tomorrow, especially North America, people will be celebrating a day of Love. Many will buy flowers and chocolates for their significant others. They will go out to a...
Posted by Jesus on Wed, 13 Feb 2008 01:29:00 PST

Tell Me what you think.

All I want you to do, is simply tell me what you think about this picture.Left to Right: German Chancellor Angela Merkel; Tony Blair, England; Kofi A.Annan, UN; Osama bin Laden; George Bush; Indian Pr...
Posted by Jesus on Wed, 12 Dec 2007 11:26:00 PST

How will you celebrate my birth?

This year millions of people will buy expensive gifts for their family, and eat lots of food to celebrate My birth. And I do love celebrations, My first miracle was at a wedding, so you know I h...
Posted by Jesus on Sat, 08 Dec 2007 02:34:00 PST

The Zeitgeist blog is missing!

Well the one who types does not know what happened to the Zeitgeist blog. He did not take it down, but it is missing none the less. He also did not save it, and so he can not simply repost...
Posted by Jesus on Sat, 08 Dec 2007 02:13:00 PST

So the Pope says you are in the wrong church?

One of my children recently released a statement causing some confusion that needs My attention. The man formerly known as Joseph Ratzinger, now as Pope Benedict XVI (I don't know why he insists on be...
Posted by Jesus on Thu, 19 Jul 2007 11:31:00 PST

The Misconception of Pride

There is a horrible misconception that the great majority of people (And even many of My children!) seem to have about Me that I need to clear up. A quick scan of the comments on My page will give you...
Posted by Jesus on Sun, 03 Jun 2007 12:01:00 PST

Homosexuality

I know it has been some time since my last blog, but the one who types has been busy, and to be quite honest he can also be a bit lazy at times. That being said I have seen a lot of people with ...
Posted by Jesus on Tue, 13 Feb 2007 01:03:00 PST