AIM=x4thos3about2rok. Get at me.
When I have the time to spare, which is often, I like to renovate people's houses.
The people are generally poor, or otherwise down on their luck. Perhaps a beloved pet or old person has recently died. While construction is taking place I send the family to somewhere fun, such as Disney World or Super Wal-Mart. I send them in a nice car (sometimes even a limousine, if it is a large family). The renovations are extensive, and I do them all by myself because I am very "handy" and "people don't like working with me". I'm sure I sound pretty great, and probably handsome too, and both of these things are true. However, in all sincerity, I do these things because I think it's what the big J would want. Jesus. I'd expect people to do the same for me if I was poor, which I'm totally not at all. It's all pretty much like those television shows, except that I usually do most of the work profoundly drunk, tend to do a remarkably shitty job, and later demand from the family a ton of money. This is all, of course, completely untrue, except for the bit about my handsomeness, which I will stand by. Mr Sailboat, my official biographer, is currently penning my actual life, and has allegedly gotten as far as next month.
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