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Mary

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

I've had a million jobs and a ton of "careers" but I think I've finally settled into the place I'm meant to be.make
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My Interests

I love Zenin' at the beach.
I used to love to play ice hockey. I can play any position including goalie. I think I got tired of it. I need to find a new sport of passion. Or maybe I need to just get my ass back on the ice.
I love to write. It would be nice to one day share my knowledge and experiences in life with others through my writings. I think this would help me to feel like my life was worth something.
I love my family, my cats and dog and my friends.
Back when I had credit cards, I used to travel a lot. I backpacked in Western Europe after I graduated from college. I've been to most of the US including Alaska but excluding Hawaii, the Pacific Northwest, and parts of the Midwest. I've been to some select cities in Canada (Vancouver, Winnipeg, Toronto, and Montreal.) I've also been to Mexico (Cancun, Veracruz and Tijuana) and of course, Jamaica (my birthplace). And I've been to Venezuela and Margarita Island. I haven't been anywhere in awhile but I hope to make it to Korea this year (2006) to visit my sister in Korea. And I'll definitely be going to Jamaica for New Year's to celebrate my parents' 40th wedding anniversary.
One of these days when I get my act together I'm going to go to graduate school. I'd like to attend JFK University in Northern California to get a Masters degree in Transpersonal Psychology with a specialization in Holistic Studies.
Oh, and I like to do yoga, esp. chakra yoga because it helps me to feel relaxed.
One other thing I'm interested in is trading Forex (foreign exchange). I just wish I had some money to trade. If I could ever get a good system going, I could be a friggin' billionaire. And then maybe I could afford to save the world from self-destruction.

I'd like to meet:

I'm open to meeting all kinds of people. I see everyone as a potential friend.

Music:

Qkumba Zoo - The Child Inside
Music Video Codes By Music Video Code I will listen to pretty much anything except R&B and Technoshit/Hip Hop. What I listen to depends on my mood. I love Dido and like to listen to "See the Sun" when I'm sad because it gives me hope. Plus I can relate to hiding in my sad world.
I'm a child of the '80's and '90's so a lot of what I like is from those eras...My first concert ever was Cyndi Lauper. Second concert was Madonna on her Virgin tour. Would you believe the Beastie Boys opened up for her? Yeah, people literally threw tomatoes at them. Not a good matchup for the times. Oh, and I got in trouble for wearing my Madonna concert shirt to school. My 8th grade math teacher who looked just like Yoda made me turn the shirt inside out just because it said "virgin."
Favorite all-time bands include R.E.M., New Order, Erasure, Pearl Jam, Nirvana, the Smashing Pumpkins, the Offspring, and the Toadies.
I hardly listen to the radio anymore because the car I drive doesn't have a stereo and when I'm at home I'm too busy watching TV or checking my email. But I did work at a radio station once. That was very cool. I worked at Clear Channel Communications when the alternative rock station, "The Buzz," switched dials. They had a "switch party" and STP played. That was a cool night...uh, until the guy I liked blew me off and my drunk, hysterical ass tried to drive home through tears in her eyes and ended up blowing through the HOV lane barricade. Yeah, I think my guardian angel went into cardiac arrest that night, but somehow managed to get me home safely without killing anyone.
I almost forgot, I'm a huge disco fan. I love Abba, esp. "Dancing Queen." And "Do Ya Think I'm Sexy" by Rod the Bod Stewart brings back fond memories of summer days spent in Jamaica.
We didn't have cable when I was growing up so I'd stay up late and watch "Friday Night Videos." I bet none of you remembers the cheesiest video ever, "When the Rain Begins to Fall" by Jermaine Jackson and Pia Zadora. Yeah, the only time I got to see MTV was when I babysat the kids across the street cuz they had cable. I remember dancing to the "Thriller" video with the little girls I babysat. Yeah, I just dated myself. I'm officially OLD!

Movies:

I suppose since I've seen Usual Suspects more times than any other movie on the planet, that would have to be my all-time favorite. Kevin Spacey's very cool. Pay it Forward is another excellent Spacey film.
Other favorites include The Bad Seed (original version), Taxi Driver, The Graduate, Digging to China, Girl Interrupted, and Life is Beautiful. Oh, and Muriel's Wedding. Oh, and all-time best comedy is I'm Gonna Git You Sucka.
Favorite teenybopper movie would probably be St. Elmo's Fire. I also like Stand By Me (RIP River Phoenix.) Best thriller would be The Shining.

Television:

I'm a TV junkie. It doesn't help that I'm currently not working. My "new" favorite show is "Fear Factor." I know this show isn't new, but I never used to watch it before because of all the gross stuff the contestants have to eat. But one day I sat through an entire episode and realized that only one of the three stunts is eating gross stuff and I like watching the other stunts. I think I'd like to compete on the show one day, not so much to win the $50K, though that would be nice. I'd just like the challenge of facing some of my fears. I've got lots of fears. I hate all bugs, esp. cockroaches. I'm claustrophobic. I think I'd panic if I had to be under water too long. I'm not that scared of heights, but I bungee-jumped once and that has got to be the scariest thing I've ever done. I almost didn't do it.
Back to TV shows. I'm a CSI addict. I'll watch pretty much any crime drama -- Law & Order, Cold Case, Without a Trace, Crossing Jordan, The Medium, Numbers...All-time favorite sitcom is Seinfeld, though I've seen every episode like fifty times. Oh, and I'm into Lost, though it's annoying how every episode is dragged out.
I used to work in television. Well, I was a media buyer for an ad agency. That was a good job for me because I got to estimate the ratings of the TV shows based on past ratings. It was fun trying to predict how the shows would do. Oh, and yes, I watch sports on TV. I'm not as into sports as I used to be, but I'm a definite sucker for the Olympics -- gymnastics, especially.

Books:

I read a lot of non-fiction books on spirituality, esp. Buddhist/psychology-type books. One of my favorites is Zen Miracles: Finding Peace in an Insane World by Brenda Shoshanna. Others include There's A Spiritual Solution to Every Problem and The Power of Intention, both by Wayne Dyer. I think everyone should read The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz.
I like to read biographies and autobiographies. My favorite autobiography is The Diary of Anne Frank (see heroes).
And yes, I do read some fiction. The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown is worth the hype. I read it straight through in some ten hours. I was mostly drawn to the religious contraversies that it exposed.
She's Come Undone is the last fiction book I read. I was impressed with Wally Lamb's ability to write from a female perspective. And I don't think he's gay. Just in touch with his feminine side, I guess.

Heroes:

My mom is my hero. When she dies I'm personally going to canonize her as St. Virginia. I know I will never be able to repay her for all that she has done for me and continues to do for me every day. I just hope that one day I have the opportunity to be a mother and pay it forward with unconditional love and support for my children.
Anne Frank is another hero. I am in awe at all that she had to go through at such a young age. The first time I read her autobiography was as an 8th grade reading assignment. I cried and cried when I read that she had died. Her story touched me so deeply when I read it. Even though some forty years had passed since she'd died, to me it was as if she were dying for the first time.
Other heroes include the Buddha, the Dalai Lama, Mother Teresa, and Angelina Jolie.

My Blog

Tired of being me

Tired of being me. Tired of getting panic attacks on planes. Tired of not having fun when everyone around me is having a blast. Tired of being sad and alone and feeling like I'm not in the right place...
Posted by Mary on Thu, 05 Jul 2007 12:16:00 PST

Almost

I looked through the entire mood list and "disappointed" is the closest to any mood I could think of that I am feeling. I guess another one might be "confused." I just don't know what's going on and i...
Posted by Mary on Fri, 15 Jun 2007 09:44:00 PST

Yay for small victories and other stuff

Well, one of my anxiety-inducers is driving in traffic in torrential downpours, mostly because of a bad experience I had last summer. The other day my anxiety was pretty bad (separation anxiety) and I...
Posted by Mary on Fri, 15 Jun 2007 06:56:00 PST

I need anger management

I teach an anger management class at work. What is so ridiculous is that I need anger management. I totally screwed up today and said something I shouldn't have. I feel like an f'-up. It's late and my...
Posted by Mary on Wed, 13 Jun 2007 09:38:00 PST

Pre-Birthday Rantings

So, my birthday is two weeks from today (May 26th). As an early birthday present to myself I bought myself a laptop. It's got built-in Wi-Fi capabilities so now I can be one of the "cool" people that...
Posted by Mary on Sun, 13 May 2007 05:21:00 PST

Not good

Not feeling well. Having trouble sleeping. Waking up to horrible anxiety. No one to talk to but my cats. And they don't talk back. They just look at me weird when I cry. I know I have lots of people t...
Posted by Mary on Thu, 08 Mar 2007 08:45:00 PST

I'd say things are better...

A year ago I wasn't working and I got a horrible panic attack when I was at a volunteer meeting. Two years ago I was in the hospital. Now I have a job and my panic attacks are under control. I'd say t...
Posted by Mary on Sat, 05 Aug 2006 05:55:00 PST

Turning Anger into Love

--> Eknath Easwarans Thought for the Day July 18I have learned through bitter experience the one supreme lesson to conserve my anger, and as heat conserved is transmu...
Posted by Mary on Tue, 18 Jul 2006 06:50:00 PST

Thought for the Day: The Great Art

--> Eknath Easwaran's Thought for the Day June 1That one I love who is incapable of ill will, and returns love for hatred. Living beyond the reach of I and mi...
Posted by Mary on Thu, 01 Jun 2006 06:05:00 PST

Happy Birthday to me!!! :)

Yep, I am officially in a new demographic. Today I turn the big 3-5. Only 5 years to 40! I think back to how much my life has improved since my last birthday. A year ago today I was in pretty bad shap...
Posted by Mary on Fri, 26 May 2006 07:26:00 PST