Ben - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I chew nicotine gum and smoke cigarettes cause I like them both, I own a bowling ball named girl, I have a masters degree in philosophy, I drink the Malort, I've lived in five cities on two continents, my favourite book is Lolita, my favourite author is Calvino, I mix up my German and my Danish rendering them both useless, I beat up a cop and got away with it when I was 22, I cussed out a cop's horse and didn't get away with it when I was 19, I'm a published author, I owned a 1979 powder blue Renault Alliance convertible for awhile, Fallout Boy played my apartment, I lived with a paranoid southerner who was collecting guns for the revolution for awhile, I briefly opened a speak-easy in New Orleans, I built the back porch on my parents house, I had more shop credit than English credit and history credit combined in high school, I'm the last white man in my generation who can't play guitar, I'm pretty good at ping-pong, I vomited on AFI before they got big, etc.

My Interests

Rock n' Roll, bars, pretty girls, drinkin', cussin', spittin', and fightin'.

Music:

Rock n' Roll, Northern Soul, Shoe Gazer, New Wave, Soul, Spazz Jazz, etc, etc, etc... I listen to the clash a lot and my first show was The Vindictives and The Queers.

Movies:

I like going to the movies

Television:

msprm name=

Books:

I gotta fucking ton of books, like 1100 of em.

Heroes:

Walter Benjamin, Walter Payton, Plato.

My Blog

I had a dream

I had a dream last night that I went to a car dealership. I met with a salesman and picked one out that I thought I would like, it was blue and sort of sporty. He handed me the keys and said it ...
Posted by Ben on Thu, 30 Aug 2007 07:09:00 PST

They have completed their examination of me

I either passed magnificently or failed so badly I couldn't tell that I didn't know the answrers. The important thing is that I spazzed for 50 straight hand written pages over the course of ten ...
Posted by Ben on Sun, 19 Aug 2007 04:57:00 PST

They are examining me

I take the first of two five hour long preliminary exams in about 8 hours. I started studying (hungover) yesterday and was depressed to discover that I'm already pretty much caught up. Parmenide...
Posted by Ben on Mon, 13 Aug 2007 09:18:00 PST

Damn the Cypriats!

In the upcoming election I would like to be the first to call for a cold war unity ticket. I want Reagen and Cruschev to form together into a megalith of righteous indignation. I want Reag...
Posted by Ben on Wed, 25 Jul 2007 02:56:00 PST

Slayer is our last and best hope

I went to the metal bar down the street from my apartment on Sunday and saw the future of human happiness. It was a 35 year hesher fresh from his D&D game in palatine, all by himself and hap...
Posted by Ben on Fri, 20 Jul 2007 04:42:00 PST

Best Break Up Poem Ever Written

My friend Jeff Kane wrote this about someone special to him, it's brutal:Valentine's JudeaThis girl is a shylock of loveshe jewed my happiness down to a ninety percent discountmy heart split eight way...
Posted by Ben on Fri, 13 Jul 2007 06:19:00 PST

Teaching Evaluations

I just got my teaching evaluations, below are a few gems: Q: Pleas comment on those aspects of the teaching which need improvement? A: -Smile More -Don't throw stuff at students Q: Please comment on...
Posted by Ben on Fri, 12 May 2006 03:08:00 PST

Myspace and Game Theory

This weeks blog will deviate from the usual discussion of language to explain a fundemental idea in Game Theory and its application to life in Myspace. Among the most discussed and controversi...
Posted by Ben on Wed, 03 May 2006 06:38:00 PST

I took a Survey.

It is listed below. 1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought? -Glorious Work! Bravo! Either the lord is a sculpter or chance knows how to smile. 2. Wh...
Posted by Ben on Mon, 10 Apr 2006 07:49:00 PST

A Slippery Slope

I do not usually write whole blogs to complain about common misusage but this has been getting under my craw for some time. "Slippery Slope" is the name of an informal logical fallacy which seek...
Posted by Ben on Wed, 01 Mar 2006 09:47:00 PST