jesus satan profile picture

jesus satan

it turns out that i'm not even a rock star.

About Me

HEY! LOOK PAST THE SURFACE, FUCKERS! i'm not some chick fucking a rabbit! it's called sarcasm...

don't try to add me without sending me love letters first... perhaps some chocolates. send a request without preface and it will be unrequited. such are the harshities of life.

i'm not a dick, i just don't care.
Your Depression Level: 96%
You seem to be severely depressed.
You should seek immediate attention from your physician.
Depression can be cured - you just need to take the first step. Are You Depressed?p.s. you know what's fucked up about this? i was just being honest.

My Interests

my cats fucking rule. also, i like sex a lot, but the two hardly ever coincide.

I'd like to meet:

i've already met them...maybe this guy.

Music:

FAITH NO MORE



old skull.

Movies:

all of them.

Television:

sigh.

Books:

print is dead. Bukowski is swell, but reading his stuff usually makes me want to stab myself in the flesh.
a woman, a tire that's flat, a disease, a desire: fears in front of you, fears that hold so still you can study them like pieces on a chessboard… it's not the large things that send a man to the madhouse. death he's ready for, or murder, incest, robbery, fire, flood… no, it's the continuing series of small tragedies that send a man to the madhouse… not the death of his love but a shoelace that snaps with no time left … The dread of life is that swarm of trivialities that can kill quicker than cancer and which are always there - licence plates or taxes or expired driver's license, or hiring or firing, doing it or having it done to you, or roaches or flies or a broken hook on a screen, or out of gas or too much gas, the sink's stopped-up, the landlord's drunk, the president doesn't care and the governor's crazy. lightswitch broken, mattress like a porcupine; $105 for a tune-up, carburetor and fuel pump at sears roebuck; and the phone bill's up and the, market's down and the toilet chain is broken, and the light has burned out - the hall light, the front light, the back light, the inner light; it's darker than hell and twice as expensive. then there's always crabs and ingrown toenails and people who insist they're your friends; there's always that and worse; leaky faucet, christ and christmas; blue salami, 9 day rains, 50 cent avocados and purple liverwurst.or making it as a waitress at norm's on the split shift, or as an emptier of bedpans, or as a carwash or a busboy or a stealer of old lady's purses leaving them screaming on the sidewalks with broken arms at the age of 80.suddenly 2 red lights in your rear view mirror and blood in your underwear; toothache, and $979 for a bridge $300 for a gold tooth, and china and russia and america, and long hair and short hair and no hair, and beards and no faces, and plenty of zigzag but no pot, except maybe one to piss in and the other one around your gut.with each broken shoelace out of one hundred broken shoelaces, one man, one woman, one thing enters a madhouse.so be careful when you bend over.-c. bukowski

Heroes:

i don't believe in heroes.
not the terrorists?maybe these guys...

My Blog

" contr overs ial surve y"

1) Do you have the guts to answe r these quest ions and post them as "The Contr overs ial Surve y" ? gee, miste r. . . i dunno . seems kinda lame. and i think you' re confu sing the term " ...
Posted by jesus satan on Sat, 11 Oct 2008 02:40:00 PST

see you in heaven, George Carlin

...
Posted by jesus satan on Mon, 23 Jun 2008 11:28:00 PST

Tape + your ultimate destiny = this weekend

sorry to bother, but one more reminder about this weekend's final performances... it's a play called Tape i directed under my wdavis pseudonym, so if you're free, then please stop on by. here, as ince...
Posted by jesus satan on Thu, 06 Sep 2007 01:16:00 PST

jesus satan is also available for directing...

hi all,i've gone and done it again. i'm directing another play under one of my numerous aliases... Tape, about what happens when three old friends come together. um, plus there's a rape and stuff.it s...
Posted by jesus satan on Wed, 29 Aug 2007 08:50:00 PST

kids in the hall + buzzcocks = i rule

so sometimes i really hate living in L.A., but last night i met Kevin Macdonald and Dave Foley from the Kids in the Hall at the Buzzcocks show at Spaceland.and they were super awesome. Kevin Macdonald...
Posted by jesus satan on Sat, 18 Aug 2007 10:45:00 PST

Alex.

you have to be cold, and alone& because only then will you be able to make a fire, out of necessity, that will last& and burn& and others will be able to see it's light from the distance& though ...
Posted by jesus satan on Wed, 15 Aug 2007 12:46:00 PST

heads up...

early warning. directing a play starring three very talented and attractive people, last weekend of Aug., first weekend of Sept.come one, come all......
Posted by jesus satan on Fri, 03 Aug 2007 10:59:00 PST

sadness...

i was thinking the other day that he was probably going to die soon. not sure why, but y'all best not piss me off, because i am, apparently, a god, with control over life and death.of some sort.but i ...
Posted by jesus satan on Tue, 31 Jul 2007 06:41:00 PST

salt.

can taste the salt in everything&my food& no matter what i do. salt and salt and salt and salt and salt...buy unsalted, and there's still the salt.drink tap water, and it's like the salt of an ocean. ...
Posted by jesus satan on Sun, 20 May 2007 09:12:00 PST

a prayer to my own heart.

i am damned as certain as a right angle, and with burning viscosity.baby spiders of the thousands will feast on my smiling face,because hell exists after all.
Posted by jesus satan on Mon, 12 Feb 2007 09:30:00 PST