Lance Uppercut profile picture

Lance Uppercut

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

my name is barney gumble, I'm 40, I'm single, and I drink "There's a line in `Othello' about a drinker: `Now a sensible man, by and by a fool, and presently a beast.' That pretty well covers it." "Don't cry for me," "I'm already dead."--If you don't know what this is from then you suck! ---Some words to describe me: sensible, logical, generous, friendly, nerdy, loyal, painfully sarcastic, blunt, cunning, hot wings, marvelous, retarded
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: kevin
Birthplace: seattle
Current Location: lake city
Eye Color: brown
Hair Color: dark brown
Height: 5'10"
Right Handed or Left Handed: depends on what im doing
Your Heritage: american
The Shoes You Wore Today: havent put on the kicks yet
Your Weakness: weakness? pppssshhhh!
Your Fears: getting super fat
Your Perfect Pizza: pepperoni
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: clean my room
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: dont do that anymore
Thoughts First Waking Up: im so effin hung over
Your Best Physical Feature: my gargoyle feet
Your Bedtime: whenever kevin says so
Your Most Missed Memory: the memories that ive forgotten
Pepsi or Coke: whatever, i drink both
MacDonalds or Burger King: i try to stay away, but i guess BK
Single or Group Dates: either
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: either
Chocolate or Vanilla: vanilla
Cappuccino or Coffee: coffee, strong and black, like the way i like my women..JK
Do you Smoke: slightly
Do you Swear: fuck no
Do you Sing: yeah, to entertain myself at work, and annoy people
Do you Shower Daily: yap
Have you Been in Love: i dont think so
Do you want to go to College: i am
Do you want to get Married: maybe eventually
Do you belive in yourself: for the most part
Do you get Motion Sickness: naw
Do you think you are Attractive: sometimes
Are you a Health Freak: i wish, i could be doing myself a big favor
Do you get along with your Parents: oh yeah
Do you like Thunderstorms: only when im not caught in the middle of one
Do you play an Instrument: the rusty trombone....JK, no i used to play violin
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: like a matter of hours ago
In the past month have you Smoked: last night, shit
In the past month have you been on Drugs: only my medication
In the past month have you gone on a Date: no. :(
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: hate malls
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: naw
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: im not sure, its been awhile
In the past month have you been on Stage: naw
In the past month have you been Dumped: naw
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: naw
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: naw...maybe a stick of gum
Ever been Drunk: yesireebob
Ever been called a Tease: i dont know
Ever been Beaten up: not really
Ever Shoplifted: yeah, i was a little punk
How do you want to Die: go out like Scarface
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: a child
What country would you most like to Visit: your mom
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: whatever
Favourite Hair Color: brunette
Short or Long Hair: its all good
Height: at least three inches shorter than myself
Weight: not too much extra love
Best Clothing Style: no clothes
Number of Drugs I have taken: just don't be an addict
Number of CDs I own: eh?
Number of Piercings: its all good
Number of Tattoos: limited
Number of things in my Past I Regret: is this question for me, or "in a boy/girl"?
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

My Interests

Oh, you know, the usual, playing pool, driving around.. the occasional acid flashback

I'd like to meet:

whoever .. width="425" height="350" .. width="425" height="350" .. .. width="425" height="350" ..d.. puppet master, bopn andre, elsewhere, and skywalker, all dope dancers (watch for andre's dime-stops, straight ILL!!)- plus they're playing Tour de France by Kraftwerk, great old school track .. width="425" height="350" .. More poppin with Sally Sly n Acki, funky funky funky .. width="425" height="350" ..

Music:

I like lots of music, but I won't say what cuz no-name artists keep trying to add me to their friends list and it's damn annoying.

Movies:

LOTR, star wars, matrix, lock stock, snatch, lost in translation, eternal sunshine, garden state, donnie darko, ninja scroll, akira, ghost in the shell, princess mononoke, fist of the northstar, most anime, crash, batman, requiem for a dream, trainspotting, predator, T2, alien, aliens, Conan, judge dredd, warriors, butterfly effect, hero, alice in wonderland, party monster, house of flying daggers, motorcycle diaries, amores perros, princess bride, royal tenenbaums, million dollar baby, shawshank redemption, napoleon dynamite, american history X, meet the parents/fockers, crouching tiger, do the right thing, TMNT, american beauty, traffic, super troopers, evil dead, army of darkness, office space, fear and loathing, good fellas, scarface, godfather movies, SLC punk, donnie brasco, big, forrest gump, harry potter movies, texas chainsaw massacre, the wizard, fight club, inner space, dazed n confused, seven, legends of the fall, kill bill, resevoir dogs, wild style, breakin 1&2, crush groove, beat street, and many, many more...

Television:

intellectual stuff, and funny cartoons, with crude humor.

Books:

Soundwave is da ish! The Samurai Rabbit! Boh!..................this artist(Justin Bua) needs to make more art for realThis one everyone has, mine's in my room (below) ......................... currently the best cheap bottled beer, fudge yeah! have you met my wife?

Heroes:

iron man, the hulk, krang, optimus p http://www.wimp.com/rubberjohnny/

My Blog

quotable quotes

"I ate so much pussy my beard looked like a glazed donut" --Dennis Hopper in "The River's Edge" "good....bad.....I'm the guy with the gun" --Bruce Campbell in "Army of Darkness" "Surely you can't be...
Posted by Lance Uppercut on Wed, 30 Nov 2005 08:56:00 PST

idiots!

the last three times that i went to any drive-thru, the people messed up my orders so royally that i wanted to shoot someone.  but for real, i tell the dude to "double-check" my order, and all th...
Posted by Lance Uppercut on Thu, 24 Nov 2005 02:43:00 PST