Crass Hoppa

I live in San Francisco. I like it here, it's nice. I meet lots of weirdos and feel right at home. I eat biscuits and gravy as much as possible. I have invaded and taken over the room of a 17 year old. He had a lot of comics and video games which are now all mine. One of my legs is ever so slightly shorter than the other, but I won't say which one. I lent myself five bucks once and never paid myself back. My favorite gift of all time is the megaphone Willy gave me, because I JUST NEED TO BE LOUDER SOMETIMES. I never answer a question the same way twice, this has a tendency to frustrate people. I find that to be hilarious. I also think a dog that has one wooden leg and three good ones to be the funniest thing of all time - so that should tell you something. I have a scar on my chin just like Han Solo. I like to tell people this often so that it gets into their subconscious. Then, if you forget what I look like, someone can say "Ya know? The dude with the Han Solo scar," and you'll know exactly who they're talking about, and then people will start associating me with good 'ol Han. I think more things should be made out of Nerf, except for hammers, that's just cruel. I intend to win the lottery and never work again. The lottery has yet to receive that memo, but it'll happen soon. I wish someone would allow Joss Whedon to make more movies and to enforce a limit on the amount of lame-O movies Tom Cruise and Ben Stiller get to make. I'm sure there's more to this story but I'd be really surprised if you've even read this far. For that, you get a cookie!