Gemma profile picture

Gemma

I am here for Serious Relationships

About Me

I'm learning to play bass again, i am crap, but it distracts me. I really want to start a band, but no one else wants to. I'm hoping to get some shit together at least for FEST 8 so i can get one of those free PBR wristbands. I taught myself "happy birthday" and figured out bits of 1 Soviettes song, 95% of the whole Ramones catalog AND a High Tension Wires song today alone. Last night I came up with a nice little tune that, i think, would actually be an ok song with some drums and guitar. At this rate, i feel the debut solo album will be ready to record in about 10 days. For the cover I'm thinking a half naked, photoshopped to oblivion portrait of myself ala Mariah Carey, or Beyonce. I might give myself a music myspace. I might become an internet sensation like Tila Tequila. Naturally in a year or so i would then get my own reality TV love search show. All contestants would have to be chubby and hairy. I'd call it "I Need A Shot of Love, Can You Guess Where?!".

My Interests

Talking to myself. Being rad. Being shy. Pizza loving. Mexican food. Beer. Whiskey. Dude's with 'tude's. Whining. Giggling. Belly achin'. Big heart. Big belly. Small ass. Constant earthquake paranoia. Paying complements to the point of being a total creep. Yes my eyelashes are real and no, i'm not wearing a hair piece or wig. Hooped earrings, hoodies, no pants.

I'd like to meet:

Pulled pork, fried chicken, beer.

Music:

Basically, all the good stuff.

Movies:

Anything with dwarves, zombies, violence, blood, sex scenes and fights.

Television:

Peepshow. The Hills.

Books:

Dishwasher.

Heroes:

Mom and Dad. Girl groups. My bra.

My Blog

An open letter to Pizza

All i can think about is how much i want your hot cheesy goodness/badness in my mouth. I love you, i'm salivating. I have had you for dinner 4 times times this week, and once as a post midnight snack....
Posted by Gemma on Mon, 02 Jul 2007 01:46:00 PST

A poem someone wrote about me...

You're My Favourite (UK spelling edit)You're my favourite hooker of all time,all the other white girls wait in line,'cause you're my favourite hooker of all time.By Ravi on the back of a napkin, Hemlo...
Posted by Gemma on Thu, 29 Mar 2007 03:33:00 PST

Maltitol

I don't think i have ever shit more in my life than i have done in the past 2 hours. I never thought i would liken any food, especially chocolate, to satan but Hershey's Sugar free dark chocolate squa...
Posted by Gemma on Thu, 09 Nov 2006 08:02:00 PST

Me and my house mate without our make up.

...
Posted by Gemma on Tue, 10 Oct 2006 12:13:00 PST

8:08pm, August 2nd 2006...

I felt my first earthquake! That is all. It was scary and exciting, when the floor moves, things are just weird. Ok, off to catch a plane to England. It's all go and glamour when you are a whiskey soa...
Posted by Gemma on Thu, 03 Aug 2006 02:22:00 PST

It's So BIG It's Fluorescent

No, M.O.T.O weren't singing about my big zit of 2006 but they may as well have been. One of my first "blogs" ever was about 2004s once a year spot. No, I'm not blessed with the skin of a peach, but as...
Posted by Gemma on Tue, 30 May 2006 09:12:00 PST

Uh Oooh

Butt grabbing is considered a 3rd degree form of sexual ASS-ault. Better keep them drunken hands under control from now on.
Posted by Gemma on Tue, 23 May 2006 04:42:00 PST

Best Birthday EVER!!

Thank you to everyone who got in touch in some form or another and those who actually managed it out to come drinking with me - i love you all, you all rule. So the day started well with a, actually m...
Posted by Gemma on Mon, 01 May 2006 01:21:00 PST

"Healthy May"

No Booze all month (except for May25th)No Pizza ALL monthNo Mexican food until Sunday May 21st (FUCK)
Posted by Gemma on Mon, 01 May 2006 10:42:00 PST

A small query...

why am i such a lazy piece of shit?
Posted by Gemma on Tue, 25 Apr 2006 04:57:00 PST