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kittykhatdoll

Come hear the voices in my head ...They say you wanna hurt me and they want you dead

About Me


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I'm a model on
My blood consists in half of tetracyclines, heptabarbital and opium. My name is Tramadol Hydrochloride. You can fall asleep with me with no pain, forget your problems with smile of delight on your mouth. My love is sodium pentobarbital. Turns off the central nervous system, taking a breath away, close the eyes, raises over the matter.
Cyclobarbital, has taken my dreams, killed the illusions. I was lifeless without my daily dose, almost addicted. MAde my hands tremble, when my mouth didnt relished that characteristic taste, so special for barbiturate's calcium salts. Cyclobarbital works as fast as druggerive causing physical and psychical addiction. What's good - discontinuing do not causes any side effects but a emotional disorders. Typical narcodrug for 2,5 Euro in chronical illness. But narcodrugs reveals one characteristic feature: to elipse work of previous - another must be stronger minimum about 2 molecules.
At the firts moment, he displayed effects of tiopental. Stimulated me and then muffled my nervous centers, waving with every another dose. I could suppose that after a few visions typical for black-drug-medicines, effectiveness will die with natural death, making me wait for stronger drug. After of several days application, the toxin forced into my system, making me an addict. Addiction was too strong to give it up. Heptabarbital with the most effective treatment of destroyed by previous black drugs, system. Farmacotherapy brought me effects that I couldn't expect. Now I'm the best drug addict that ever lived or stay alive more than one week. Fell into clutches of My-Perfect-Drug. Better than ever.
My Psylocybine Lover gave me more than any god could ever send. Now I had to start to live my pregnancy with new personality of mine. My veins are full of perfumes made of his skin.
...:::For all fuckz who feel frustrated or are just discontended cuz of my happiness - one I can give, and all I want is a finger. I should write they can kiss my sexy ass and get the fuck out of this site, but I think for more of them it could be the fulfilment of their dreams.
Amen. :::....
What more? Wanna something darker?
I know easier is to paste here a lyrics, poem or something like that and have a time for...whatever. But I don't like it. Then what? If I paste a song lyrics here, that it will be my reflection? No fucking chance. I'm afraif that none of them was about me. But no...once in secondary school, some freak wrote the song about me. It started from "Die bitch for everything you've done to me. May the hell take you" but hell didn't. They don't want me there. Heaven for sure the same. Poor the angels would be under my depravity.
In general, people used to call me bitch. In various combinations. Bad bitch, cold bitch, mean bitch, cynical bitch, malicious bitch or just simple - bitch. There was the time, when I thought about what is an axiom of beeing a bitch and what is not. For one I was a bitch 'cause I had dropped him from the stairs with his faded flowers he bring to me, as the sign of his love (three times shaked). For someone else I was a bitch 'caue I ridiculed his pseudo-original outfit. So my beeing a bitch is an abstract - for everyone means something else. ...and here should be dark poem about angels, razors and other blades. But it will not be.
And one thing more... Actually my single life died and I hope to be fuckin happy so every matrimonial or sex proposition will not be taken into account. You can wish me luck or death but important is, that I won't live my luck or die my death alone. Enjoy!
Phrases that I often use (sometimes too often):
-Hot!
-Have a mercy!
-It's a joke...isn't it?
-Errrr...
-Trap!
-...go to hell...
-Cigarettes...where are my cigarettes?
-Everything's synthetic
-I feel high...
-So...?
-Endorphines up!
And if someone asks - I am NOT a nazi. It's just an element of my sick design. I do not support nazi ideology and do NOT identify myself with nazism.

ONLY ONE GUY I AM MAD ABOUT

Disorder Rating
Paranoid Disorder : Very High
Schizoid Disorder : Moderate
Schizotypal Disorder : Very High
Antisocial Disorder : High
Borderline Disorder : Very High
Histrionic Disorder : High
Narcissistic Disorder : Very High
Avoidant Disorder : High
Dependent Disorder : High
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder : High
--

My Interests

My Zombieboy ^^ Shopping, Fucking, Industrial
Graphics, photography, modelling, acting, preparing to be a f-mad wife ;)

I'd like to meet:



There was Tila Tequila before but actually I'm almost married, so... criteria "I'd love to fuck" are changed now for "I 'd like to drink with"

WEDNESDAY!!!

Music:



Electro, industrial, goth, darkwave, trance

Movies:

The Devil wears Prada, Se7en, Lost Highway, Eraserhead, Zoolander

Television:

MTV!

Books:

The eye, Lolita, The enchanter, The Murders in the Rue Morgue

Heroes:

Me!
...and Anna Wintour

My Blog

Madly, madly, f-madly in luvvvvv!
Posted by KittyKhat [Sidaroth's personal Whorestar] on Fri, 26 Sep 2008 02:03:00 PST

First time I feel so high. Now I can say that all I have experienced before was needful for me to learn how to live with and for someone. Same as all guys who ever wanted to save me from myself...
Posted by KittyKhat [Sidaroth's personal Whorestar] on Tue, 15 Jul 2008 03:00:00 PST

There is no happiness without tears, no life without death.Time of tears must wait. I-feel-high
Posted by KittyKhat [Sidaroth's personal Whorestar] on Tue, 15 Apr 2008 06:21:00 PST

If I only think that worse cant be, life always shows me that I am wrong.So head up, smile on and play my fav game - everythings fine.
Posted by KittyKhat [Sidaroth's personal Whorestar] on Wed, 02 Apr 2008 09:28:00 PST